Chapter Four
Me: Pretend you’re going to the bathroom or something.
I place my phone back down on the table and begin eating again. I’ve been here almost an hour and Six and I have barely had a chance to talk. I don’t know if I’ll even need Breckin to out us, because I’m about to lose my patience and do it myself.
I know everyone’s curious about her trip to Italy, but she seems uncomfortable talking about it. Her answers are short and clipped and I hate that I’m the only one who seems to notice how much she doesn’t want to bring up Italy. I also like that I’m the only one who notices, because it proves that whatever connection I feel with her is more than likely genuine. I feel like I know her better than anyone else here. Maybe even better than Sky knows her.
Although it’s absurd to feel that way, since I still don’t even know her birthday.
Six: There’s only one bathroom in the hallway. Even if I were to go there it would be obvious if you got up and followed me.
I read her text and groan out loud.
“Everything okay?” Jack asks. He’s seated next to me at the table, which is fine any other time but I really wanted Six to be in his chair. I nod, then put my phone facedown on the table.
“Irritating girlfriend drama,” I say.
He laughs and turns back to Holder, continuing with their conversation. Six is involved in a discussion with Sky and Karen. Breckin ended up not being able to come, which was probably a good thing. Not sure I could have handled the fact that he knows.
Right now it’s just me and my impatience having a silent war at the dinner table.
“That reminds me,” Six says loudly. “I bought you all presents. I forgot.” She scoots back from the table. “They’re at my house. I’ll be right back.” She stands and takes two steps before turning back toward us. “Daniel? They’re kind of heavy. Mind giving me a hand?”
Don’t act too excited, Daniel.
I sigh heavily. “I guess,” I say as I scoot back from the table. I look at Holder and roll my eyes, then follow Six outside. Neither of us says a word while we make our way to the side of the house. She reaches her window, then turns around.
“I lied,” she says. Her eyes are worried, which causes me to worry.
“About what?”
She shakes her head. “I didn’t buy anyone presents. I just can’t take another second of all the questions, and then seeing you across the table and knowing how much I just wish it could be the two of us is making this whole dinner really irritating. But now I don’t have presents. How do I go back in there without presents?”
I try not to laugh, but I love that she’s been just as irritated as I’ve been. I was starting to worry I might have a few issues.
“We could just stay out here and never go back inside.”
“We could,” she says in agreement. “But they’d eventually come look for us. Not to mention it would be rude, since Jack and Karen went through all this trouble to cook for me and oh, my God, what if it’s true, Daniel?”
I don’t know if it’s me or if she’s just really difficult to keep up with, but I have no idea what she’s talking about. “What if what’s true?”
She exhales a quick breath. “What if our feelings are just reverse psychology? What if Holder had told you to date me Saturday night? You might not have been interested in me after that. What if the only reason we like each other so much is that it’s forbidden? What if the second they all find out the truth, we can’t stand each other?”
I hate that the worry in her voice sounds genuine, because that means she actually believes the shit she’s saying right now.
“You think there’s a chance I only like you because I’m not supposed to like you?”
She nods.
I grab her hand and yank her back toward the front of the house.
“Daniel, I don’t have presents!”
I ignore her and walk her up the front steps, open the door, and march her straight into the kitchen.
“Hey!” I yell. Everyone turns around and looks at us. I glance at Six and her eyes are wide. I inhale a deep breath, then turn back to the table. Specifically to Holder.
“She fist bumped me,” I say, pointing at Six. “It’s not my fault. She hates purses and she fist bumped me, then she made me push her on the damn merry-go-round. After that, she demanded to see where I had sex in the park, then she forced me to sneak into my own bedroom. She’s weird and half the time I can’t keep up with her, but she thinks I’m funny as hell. And Chunk asked me this morning if I wanted to love her someday, and I realized I’ve never hoped I could love someone more than I want to love her. So every single one of you who has an issue with us dating is going to have to get over it because . . .” I pause and turn toward Six. “Because you fist bumped me and I could care less who knows we’re together. I’m not going anywhere and I don’t want to go anywhere so stop thinking I’m into you because I’m not supposed to be into you.” I lift my hands and tilt her face toward mine. “I’m into you because you’re awesome. And because you let me accidentally touch your boob.”
She’s smiling wider than I’ve ever seen her smile. “Daniel Wesley, where’d you learn those smooth moves?”
I laugh. “Not moves, Six. Charisma.”
She throws her arms around my neck and kisses me. I wait for the moment Holder yanks me away from her, but that moment doesn’t come. We kiss for a solid thirty seconds before people begin clearing their throats. When Six pulls away from me, she’s still smiling.
“Does it feel different now that they know?” I ask her. “Because it actually feels better to me.”
She shoves my chest with an irritated laugh. “Stop! Stop saying things that make me grin like an idiot. My face has been hurting since the second I met you.”
I pull her to me and hug her, then suddenly become aware that we’re still standing in Sky’s kitchen and everyone is still staring at us. I hesitantly turn and look at Holder to gauge his level of anger. He’s never actually hit me before, but I’ve seen what he can do and I sure as hell don’t want to experience it.
When my eyes meet his, he’s . . . smiling. He’s actually smiling.
Sky has a napkin to her eyes and she’s wiping tears away.
Karen and Jack are both smiling.
It’s weird.
Too weird.
“Do you guys talk to my parents?” I ask cautiously. “Did they teach you their dirty reverse psychology tricks?”
Karen is the first to speak. “Sit down, you two. Your food is getting cold.”
I kiss Six on the forehead, then take my seat back at the table. I keep glancing at Holder, but he doesn’t look upset at all. He actually looks a little impressed.
“Where the hell is my present?” Jack asks Six.
She clears her throat. “I decided to wait until Christmas.” She picks up her glass and brings it to her lips, then glances at me. I smile at her.
Everyone else resumes whatever conversations were going on before my interruption. It’s like no one is even that shocked. They act like it’s completely normal. Like it’s a natural thing . . . me and Six.
And I totally get it, because it is. Whatever we have is good and even though I still don’t know her birthday . . . I know this is right. And based on the look on her face right now, so does she.
“I really like this one,” I say, looking at the picture in my hands. I’m leaning against the wall, sitting on the floor in Sky’s bedroom. Six is passing around pictures she took in Italy to Sky, Holder and me.
“Which pic are you looking at?” she says. She’s lying next to me on the floor. I look down at her and flip the photo over so she can see it. She shakes her head with a quick roll of her eyes. “You only like that one because my cleavage looks great.”
I immediately turn the photo back around. She’s right. It does look great. But that’s not at all why I liked it at first. She looks happy in this one. Peaceful.
“I took that picture the day I got to Italy,” she says. “You can keep it.”
“Thank you. I wasn’t planning on giving it back to you, anyway.”
“Consider it an anniversary present,” she says.
I immediately look down at the time on my phone. “Oh. Wow. It really is our anniversary.” I readjust myself until I’m leaning over her. “I almost forgot. I’m the worst boyfriend ever. I can’t believe you haven’t dumped me yet.”
She grins. “That’s okay. You can remember the next one.” She slips her hand to the back of my neck and pulls me forward until our lips meet.
“Anniversary?” Sky says, confused. “Exactly how long have the two of you been dating?”
I pull away from Six and sit back up against the wall. “Precisely twenty-four hours.”
An awkward silence follows, then of course Holder fills it. “Am I the only one who has a bad feeling about this?”
“I think it’s great,” Sky says. “I’ve never seen Six so . . . nice? Happy? Spoken for? It’s a good look for her.”
Six sits up and wraps her arms around my neck, then pulls me to the floor with her. “That’s because I’ve never met anyone as vulgar and inappropriate and horrible at first kisses as Daniel.” She pulls my mouth to hers and kisses me while she laughs at herself.
This is a first. A kiss and a laugh at the same time? I think I might be in heaven.
“Six has a bedroom too, you know,” Holder says.
Six stops laughing. And she stops kissing me.
Holder is about to be put on my shit list.
“Six doesn’t allow penises in her bedroom,” I reply to him while still staring down at her.
Six moves her mouth to my ear. “As long as you don’t expect me to stroke his ego tonight, I kind of want to kiss you on my bed.”
I didn’t know people could move as fast as I’m moving right now. This has to be some sort of record, because my hands are under her back and knees and I’m scooping her up in my arms before her sentence even completely registers. She throws her arms around my neck and squeals as I head straight for Sky’s window. I put her down gently, but then practically shove her outside. I begin to follow right behind her without even telling Sky or Holder goodbye.
“They are so strange together,” I hear Sky say right before I’m out the window.
“Yeah,” Holder says in agreement. “But also oddly . . . right.”
I pause.
Did Holder just compliment my relationship with Six? I don’t know why I always want his approval so much, but hearing him say that fills me with this weird sense of pride. I turn around and take a step back to the window and lean inside. “I heard that.”
He looks at the window and sees me leaning inside, so he rolls his eyes. “Go away,” he says with a laugh.
“No. We’re having a moment.”
He cocks an eyebrow, but doesn’t respond.
“You’re my best friend, Holder.”
Sky shakes her head and laughs, but Holder is still looking at me like I’ve lost my mind.
“For real,” I say. “You’re my best friend and I love you. I’m not ashamed to admit that I love a guy. I love you, Holder. Daniel Wesley loves Dean Holder. Always and forever.”
“Daniel, go make out with your girlfriend,” he says, waving me off.
I shake my head. “Not until you tell me you love me, too.”
His head falls back against Sky’s headboard. “I f*cking love you, now GO AWAY!”
I grin. “I love you more.”
He picks up a pillow and tosses it at the window. “Get the hell out of here, dipshit. ”
I laugh and back away from the window.
“You two are so strange together,” Sky says to him.
I pull the window shut, then turn around to face Six. She’s already in her bedroom, leaning out her window with her chin in her hands. She’s grinning.
“Daniel and Holder, sittin’ in a tree,” she says in a singsong voice.
I walk toward her and improvise the next line of the song. “But then Daniel climbs down,” I finish the rest of the sentence in a hurry, “and goes to Six’s window and climbs inside her bedroom and throws her on the bed and kisses her until he can’t take any more and has to go home and stroke his ego.”
She’s laughing and backing into her bedroom to make room for me to climb inside.
Once I’m inside, I look around and observe her room. I finally understand what she meant when she said my bedroom was more than just a room. This is like a secret glimpse into who Six really is. I feel like I could study this room and everything in it and find out everything I ever need to know about her.
Unfortunately, she’s standing at the foot of her bed and she looks a little bit nervous and way more beautiful than I deserve, and I can’t take my eyes off of her long enough to even study her bedroom.
I can’t help but smile at her. I can already tell this is about to be the best anniversary I’ve ever had. The lights are off, so the mood is already perfect for making out. It’s quiet, though. So quiet I can hear her breaths increase with each deliberately slow step I take toward her.
Shit. Maybe those are my breaths. I can’t tell, because every inch closer I get requires an extra intake of air.
When I reach her, she’s looking up at me with an odd mixture of peaceful anticipation. I want to push her onto the bed right now and climb on top of her and kiss the hell out of her.
I could do that, but why do the one thing she’s expecting me to do?
I lean in slowly. Very slowly . . . until my mouth is so close to her neck she more than likely can’t even tell if I’m touching her skin or not. “I have three questions I need to ask you before we do this,” I say quietly, but very seriously. I pull back just far enough to see her gulp softly.
“Before we do what?” she asks hesitantly.
I lift a hand to the back of her head, then pull back from her neck and position my lips close to hers. “Before we do what we both want to do. Before I lean in one more inch. And before you part your lips for me just enough for me to steal a taste. Before I put my hands on your hips and back you up until you have nowhere to go but onto your bed.”
I can feel her breath teasing my lips and it’s so tempting I have to force myself to lean in to her ear again so I’m not so close to her mouth. “Before I slowly lower myself on top of you and our hands become curious and brave. Before my fingers slip under the hem of your shirt. Before my hand begins to explore its way up your stomach, and I discover I’ve never touched skin as soft as yours.”
She gasps, then exhales a shaky breath and it’s almost as sexy as the fist bump.
It may even be sexier.
“Before I finally get to touch your boob on purpose.”
She laughs at that one, but her laugh is cut short when I press my thumb to the center of her lips.
“Before your breaths pick up pace and our bodies are aching because everything we’re feeling is just making us want more and more and more of each other . . . until I’m afraid I’ll beg you not to ask me to slow down. So instead, I regrettably tear my mouth from yours and force myself away from your bed and you lift up unto your elbows and look at me, disappointed, because you kind of wished I would have kept going, but at the same time you’re relieved I didn’t, because you know you would have given in. So instead of giving in, we just stare. We watch each other silently as my heart rate begins to slow down and your breaths are easier to catch and the insatiable need is still there, but our minds are clearer now that I’m not pressed against you anymore. I turn around and walk to your window and leave without even saying goodbye, because we both know if either of us speaks . . . it’ll be the collective demise of our willpower and we’ll cave. We’ll cave so hard.”
I move my hand to her cheek. She whimpers and looks like she’s about to collapse onto the bed, so I wrap my other arm around her lower back and pull her against me.
“So yeah . . . three questions first.”
I let go of her and immediately turn around two seconds before I hear her fall onto her bed. I walk straight to the desk chair and take a seat, for two reasons. One, I want her to think I mean business and that everything I just said to her didn’t affect me like it did her. And two, because I want her more than I’ve ever wanted anything and my knees were about to give out on me if I didn’t sit down.
“Question number one,” I say, watching her from across her room. She’s lying on her back with her eyes closed and I hate that I’m not watching her up close right now. “When’s your birthday?”
“October . . .”—She clears her throat, obviously still recovering—“thirty-first. Halloween.”
How could the date of a birthday make me fall even harder for her? I have no idea, but it somehow does.
“Question number two. What’s your favorite food?”
“Homemade mashed potatoes.”
Never would have guessed that one. Glad I asked.
“Question number three,” I say. “It’s a big one. Are you ready?”
She nods, but keeps her eyes closed.
“What’s the one thing in this room that tells the biggest secret about you?”
As soon as the question leaves my mouth, she’s completely still. Her exaggerated breaths come to a halt. She remains motionless for almost a whole minute before she slowly pushes herself up until she’s seated on the edge of the bed, facing me. “It has to be something inside this room?”
I nod slowly.
She lifts her hand and touches a finger to her heart, pointing at it. “This,” she whispers. “My biggest secret is right in here.”
Her eyes are moist and sad and somehow with that answer, the air instantly changes between us. In a dangerous way. A terrifying way. Because it feels like her air just became my air and I suddenly want to take in fewer breaths in order to ensure she never runs out.
I stand up and walk to the bed. Her eyes follow me closely until I’m directly in front of her. “Stand up.”
She stands slowly.
I weave both hands through the locks of her hair until I’m holding the back of her head. I stare at her until my heart can’t take anymore, then I press my lips to hers. I’ve lost count of how many times I’ve kissed her over the past day. Every time I kiss her, the feeling I get is like nothing I’ve ever experienced. The closest I’ve ever come to feeling this way is the day I was pretending to be in love with the girl in the closet. But even that day, the day I thought would surpass every day after it, doesn’t come close to this.
Her mouth is warm and inviting and everything it always is when I kiss her, but it’s also so much more. The fact that I have this reaction to her after one day scares the living shit out of me.
One day.
I’ve been doing this with her for one day and I have no idea what’s happening. I don’t know if it’s a full moon or if I have a tumor wrapped around my heart or if she really is a witch. Whatever it is still doesn’t explain how this kind of thing can exist between two people this ridiculously fast . . . and actually last.
I feel like deep down my heart knows she’s too good to be true. My mind and my whole body know she’s too good to be true, so I kiss her harder, hoping to convince myself that this is real. It’s not some fairy tale. It’s not an hour of make-believe.
This is reality, but even in our imperfect reality, people don’t fall for each other like this. They don’t develop feelings like this for someone they barely know.
The only thing my entire thought process is proving to me right now is how much I need to grab her tight and hang on, because wherever she goes, I want to go, too. And right now, she’s going backward, down onto the bed. I’m easing myself on top of her in the same way I just told her this would happen. And we’re kissing, just like I said we would, only this time it may just be a little more frantic and needy and holy shit.
Her skin.
It really is the softest skin I’ve ever touched.
I move my hand from her waist and inch my fingers underneath the hem of her shirt, then slowly begin to work my way to her stomach.
She pushes my hand away.
“Daniel.”
She immediately lifts up and I immediately lift off her. She’s breathing so heavily I catch myself holding my own breath, scared I’m hogging too much of her air.
She looks both regretful and embarrassed that she suddenly asked me to stop. I lift my hand and stroke her cheek reassuringly.
My eyes scroll over her features, taking in her nervous demeanor. She’s afraid of what might happen between us. I can see on her face and in the way she’s looking at me that she’s just as scared as I am. Whatever this is between us, neither one of us was searching for it. Neither one of us knew it even existed. Neither one of us is even remotely prepared for it, but I know we both want it. She wants this to work with me as much as I want it to work with her and seeing the look in her eyes right now makes me believe that it will. I’ve never believed in anything like I believe in the possibility of the two of us.
I can tell by the way she’s looking at me that if I tried to kiss her again, she’d let me. It’s almost as if she’s torn between the girl she used to be and the girl she is now and she’s afraid if I try to kiss her again, she’ll cave.
And I’m afraid if I don’t get up and walk away, I’ll let her.
We don’t even have to speak. She doesn’t even have to ask me to leave, because I know that’s what I need to do. I nod, silently answering the question I don’t want her to have to ask. I begin to ease off her bed and a silent thank you flashes in her eyes. I stand up, back away from her and climb out her window without a word. I walk a few feet until I reach the edge of her house, then I lean against it and slide down to the ground.
I lean my head back and close my eyes, attempting to figure out where I went right in my life to deserve her.
“What the hell are you doing?” Holder asks. I look up and he’s halfway out Sky’s window. Once he makes it all the way out, he turns and pulls her window shut.
“Recovering,” I say. “I just needed a minute.”
He walks toward me and takes a seat on the ground across from me, then leans against Sky’s house. He pulls his legs up and rests his elbows on his knees.
“You’re already leaving?” I ask him. “It’s not even nine o’clock yet.”
He reaches down to the ground and rips up a few blades of grass, then spins them between his fingers. “Got kicked out for the night. Karen walked in and my hand was up Sky’s shirt. She didn’t like that too much.”
I laugh.
“So,” he says, glancing back up at me. “You and Six, huh?”
Despite my effort not to smile, I do it anyway. I smile pathetically and nod. “I don’t know what it is about her, Holder. I . . . she just . . . yeah.”
“I know what you mean,” he says quietly, looking back down at the grass between his fingers.
Neither one of us says anything else for several moments until he drops the blades of grass and wipes his hands on his jeans, preparing to stand up. “Well . . . I’m glad we had this talk, Daniel, but the fact that we already professed our mutual love for each other tonight is leaving me a little overwhelmed. I’ll see you tomorrow.” He stands up and begins walking toward his car.
“I love you, Holder!” I yell after him. “Best friends forever!”
He keeps walking forward, but lifts his hand in the air and flips me off.
It’s almost as cool as a fist bump.