Chapter Fourteen
The rest of the week flew by. Everything was winding down at school—talk of graduation practice and parties were on everyone’s lips. Then on Monday afternoon when I breezed through the garage door, I found our kitchen had been transformed into Wedding Central. I raised my eyebrows as Mom and a dude I’d never seen before were hunched over the kitchen table buried in a mountain of books. Grammy was sitting across from them furiously taking notes. I cut my eyes over to the stove where Greg stood, arms folded over his chest.
I grabbed a bottle of water out of the refrigerator and went over to him. “Dude, what the hell is going on?”
“Your Mom’s scaled back her hours for the next few months, and I traded with Dr. Sanchez to have this afternoon off to discuss… the wedding plans.”
I leaned over and lowered my voice. “Um, who’s that?”
Greg rolled his dark green eyes. “That would be Gerard, the wedding coordinator,” he grumbled.
I eyed the guy in the pale pink suit with a fake rose in the lapel. “Wow,” I murmured.
Greg nodded. “I totally understand that Maggie has waited her entire life to have the wedding of her dreams, but him,” he paused and gave me a look like he wanted to hurl at any minute. “I don’t get him.”
Stifling a laugh, I nodded. “Dude, I feel your pain.”
Greg grinned as he held out his fist for me to bump. Normally, I would have thought he was a total douchebag, but I rethought my strategy and decided to give him a chance to try to be my future step-father. I knocked his knuckles with mine and smiled.
Mom glanced up from the pile of papers and magazines to see me. “Noah, come here and let me introduce you to Gerard.”
“Okay,” I said, reluctantly before shooting Greg a look.
As I walked over to the table, Gerard jerked his head up to take me in. A smile widened across his lips shimmering in pink lip gloss. “Now look at this fine piece of male specimen!” he exclaimed. He turned to my mom. “Maggie, when you told me you had a seventeen-year-old son, you didn’t tell me he could’ve hopped right off the runway at Fashion Week!”
Mom beamed in appreciation of his compliments of me. I, on the other hand, wanted to slap the shit out of him. I didn’t like the way he was ogling me—like I was a pretty piece of flesh or something. Ugh.
“Noah, it’s a pleasure to meet you. Your mother is one of the most promising clients I’ve had in years. Why her wedding just might make it into Atlanta Brides or another magazine,” Gerard drawled.
“Oh, um, wow. Great. Thanks,” I muttered since I was totally unsure of what to say.
He gingerly shook my hand, and then he turned back to my mom. “Isn’t he going to look absolutely divine in his tux, and when I think about him giving you away—” Gerard flapped his hand in front of his eyes, trying to calm himself. “I just want to weep at the moment!”
Dumbfounded, I stared in surprise at Mom. “You want me to give you away?”
She smiled. “Of course, I do. You will, won’t you?”
Wow, I hadn’t expected that at all. My heart did a funny flip-flop in my chest. “Yeah, course I will. It’s just you hadn’t mentioned anything, and I don’t know—I guess I thought Uncle Mark might do it since he’s your oldest brother.”
Mom shook her head. “Nope, it’s you all the way, sweetheart.”
“Oh, that’s just precious!” Gerard gushed.
I glanced over my shoulder at Greg who was doing his best to stifle his laughter behind a dish towel. He removed the towel and held his hands up in self-defense.
“Okay. I’d love too,” I said.
“And I’m sure there’s probably a hundred girls vying to be your date at the wedding, you yummy little dream,” Gerard said.
Then he did the unthinkable. He. Pinched. My. Cheek. He better be damn glad it was the cheek on my face and not my ass, or he would have been picking himself up off the floor. Involuntarily, my fist curled, and I had to fight not to smack him regardless. When I shuddered violently, Greg turned a laugh into a cough. I shot him a death glare to which he winked in response.
Mom tried not to laugh at the expression on my face. Instead, she cocked her head. “So, who are you going to bring?”
I was still contemplating my revenge on Gerard. “Huh?”
“You don’t have to bring a date, but I was just thinking you might.”
A date? Huh, I hadn’t even thought of that. The truth was even though I was more accepting about the wedding, I still wasn’t too thrilled to think or talk about it. But I’d probably look like a big loser showing up dateless to my mom’s wedding.
“Yeah, I’ll find someone.”
Mom smiled. “Oh good.” Then she bit her lip like she always did when there was something she wanted to say but wasn’t sure she ought to.
“What is it, Mom?” I questioned.
“Well, I was just going to tell you that I’ve asked Pastor Dan to marry us.”
My eyebrows shot up. “You have?”
Gregg nodded as Mom replied, “Yes, we did.”
“But you barely know him,” I countered.
“That’s true, sweetie. But after Pastor Phillips died last year, I really haven’t connected with any of the other ministers at our church, and I don’t know, there was just something I really liked about him the other night at the Nelson’s. Plus, he’s so good to visit the sick, and he always comes to the hospital to pray over the new babies.”
I didn’t really know what to say. “Then I think that’s a good idea.”
A pleased expression came over Mom’s face. “Oh good, I’m glad you think so.”
Gerard clapped his hands. “So sorry to interrupt this family moment, Maggie, but we’ve really got to press on with the details. We’re on a tight schedule here you know.”
“Hey, people who are already pregnant get married all the time!” I exclaimed, jumping to Mom’s defense.
Trying to hide a smile, Mom shook her head. “Gerard wasn’t talking about my pregnancy, Noah. He’s talking about how Greg and I have moved the wedding up because of our schedules,” she explained.
“Oh,” I murmured. Gerard raised his eyebrows at me. “Sorry,” I said.
He smiled. “No problem, sugar.”
On that note, I started backing out of the kitchen. “Where are you going?” Mom asked.
“I-uh, I gotta see about my date,” I replied.
She nodded, and I gratefully escaped out the door. As I climbed into the Jeep, I couldn’t help thinking about how Jake would have reacted to Gerard. At the insane things he might’ve said or done, laughter started bubbling out of my mouth. As I wiped the amused tears from my eyes, I couldn’t help thinking that Jake would be proud for Mom. He would have certainly enjoyed partying at the rehearsal dinner and wedding. He also would have probably made some lameass excuse that he should be made my baby sitter’s godfather—like any of us would want that. With my spirits raised, I headed over to Maddie’s.
When she answered the door, I couldn’t help myself, and I broke into a goofy grin. “Hi!”
“Hi Noah,” she said. Her expression was strained, and suddenly, I felt like an idiot for just showing up on her doorstep.
“Um, I’m sorry for not calling. Is this not a good time?”
Maddie hesitated. “It’s just, um, Josh had a treatment today, and he’s not-”
A small voice interrupted her. “Is that Noah?” Josh called.
“Yeah, it’s me,” I answered.
“Tell him to come in and visit me,” he said.
I looked at Maddie, and she nodded. She stepped aside, and I walked into the foyer. In the living room, Josh stretched out on the couch. He was so pale he could’ve passed for an albino. I hesitated at first, and then I sucked it up and headed over to him.
I eased down on the couch and smiled. “Hey Little Man, how’s it going?”
“Not good.”
“I’m sorry.”
Maddie stood behind the couch. “Hey, how about some ice cream?”
“Yeah,” Josh replied, with as much enthusiasm as he could muster.
Maddie smiled. “Okay, I’ll go fix you some.” She headed into the kitchen leaving Josh and me alone.
“So treatments suck pretty bad, huh?” I asked, trying to make conversation.
Josh widened his eyes. “You’re not supposed to say words like that.”
“Oops, sorry.”
He grinned. “That’s okay cause they really do suck!”
I laughed. I reached into my pocket and pulled out a dollar. “How about you taking this money instead of the cuss can?”
“Really?”
“Sure.”
“Okay,” he said, and he grabbed the dollar out of my hand. “I haven’t gotten anything for a treatment in a long time.”
“What do you mean?” I asked.
“Mommy and Daddy used to buy me a present for each treatment I had to do. But they can’t afford it now.”
“Why not?”
“Cause we don’t have a lot of money now cause my medicine and stuff costs so much.”
“Oh,” I murmured. Damn, not only did the Parker’s have to deal with the emotional pain of Josh’s illness, but they also had to get kicked when they were down with the financial part. It just wasn’t fair.
A panicked look entered Josh’s eyes. Before I could ask what was wrong, he jerked forward and puked all over me.
I sat in shock as my mind processed what had just happened. Part of me was utterly disgusted and wanted to race out the door and never look back. Then another part felt awful for Josh—especially after the expression of pure horror came over his face at the sight of me drenched in his vomit.
Maddie rushed back into the room. “Oh no!” she cried.
“I-I’m s-sorry, Noah,” Josh stammered.
My heart dropped at the sight of tears pooling in his big dark eyes along with his chin trembling.
“Hey, Little man, don’t cry. It’s okay.”
“N-No, it’s n-not,” he whimpered.
“Yes, it is. It’s totally fixable, okay? I promise.”
I stood up, which caused the vomit to slide down my shirt onto my jeans. Maddie rushed over to the couch. She yanked the blanket covering Josh and quickly started patting me down. When her hand dipped below my waist and brushed across my crotch, I gasped. Raising my gaze to the ceiling, I silently willed my dick not to get the wrong idea and spring into action.
Maddie flushed bright red from her cheeks all the way down to her neck while stumbling away from me. “Oh, um, I’m s-sorry.”
“It’s okay.”
She quickly turned her attention away from me and started patting Josh down. Luckily for him, he only had a little on the top of his Scooby Doo pajamas. The rest had managed to hit me and the blanket.
Once Josh was cleaned up, Maddie turned to me. “Why don’t I get you something to change into?”
“Okay.”
“Come on,” she said, motioning for me to follow her. We left Josh for a moment as we headed down the hall to her parent’s bedroom. She flicked on the light in the closet and started rifling through her father’s things. Pastor Dan was a big, muscular dude, so the clothes were gonna be a little awkward.
Maddie handed me a shirt. “I’ll find you some shorts, too,”
“Thanks,” I replied. Without thinking, I tore my puke- stained shirt off. Maddie momentarily stopped searching the racks to stare at me. Not just the way you’d look at somebody who happened to be undressing in front of you, but more like somebody you wanted to be undressing. I’d never seen that look in her eyes before, and I had to admit, I totally dug it. A whole reel of fantasy images flickered through my mind of her running her hands over my bare chest or kissing a wet trail down to my…F*ck! Get a grip, Pervert! Her sick brother just puked on you, and she’s just trying to help you, not screw you!
My sex-fiend thoughts were forgotten as Maddie’s face turned beet red when she finally realized she was openly ogling me. “S-Sorry.” She thrust a pair of gym shorts at me.
“Thanks.”
Because she looked so cute and sexy when she blushed, I brought my hands to the button of my jeans. Her eyes widened, and she flushed all the way down her neck. “I better go check on Josh,” she muttered and then quickly breezed past me. Inwardly I groaned as the delicious and dangerously sexy scent of her perfume invaded my nostrils. It was like a jumpstart to my groin each and every time.
She practically sprinted out in the hallway before I could say anything. I smiled as I changed into the shorts. When I got back to the living room, she’d already gotten Josh a change of pajamas and a new blanket was covering him.
“All better?” I asked.
“I think so.”
“So where’s your mom and dad?” I asked.
A funny look came over Maddie’s face. “They, uh, had to take care of some business—um, church business, so I told them I’d watch Josh.”
I could tell there was something she wasn’t telling me, but I let it go. I noticed Josh was peering up at me. “What is it, Little Man?”
“Maddie says you sing and play guitar.”
“Yeah, I do.”
“Then will you sing for me?”
“What?” I asked in surprise.
“It’s just Daddy always sings to me after I have a treatment—you know so I can go to sleep and all.”
I glanced over at Maddie, and she smiled. “Well, I don’t know…”
“Please?”
Geez, what could I say? “No, Little man, I’m just not feeling it this afternoon?” Yeah, that would make me an unimaginable a*shole.
“Okay, I guess I could. What do you want me to sing?”
“Know any John Lennon?”
I raised my eyebrows. “Course I do—do you?”
Josh gave me a wide grin, showing the gap from one of his newly lost teeth. “Yeah, he’s one of my daddy’s favorites.”
“Is that right?”
“Uh, huh. You know Beautiful Boy?”
“Yeah, I know it,” I replied. Warmth filled me because it was one of my mom’s favorite songs. She loved for me to play it because she said it was exactly how she felt about me. She also had me change all the times John mentioned “daddy” to “mommy”.
“Will you play it then? Daddy plays that one for me a lot.”
“Okay.”
Maddie went to her dad’s office and came back with a shiny Gibson Southern Jumbo. “Wow, nice,” I mused.
She smiled. “It’s Daddy’s treasure.”
I gently took it from her. “I promise to be very careful.” After I eased down in the chair next to the couch, I took the pick out of the top and then stared down at the strings. My body shuddered as I realized the last time I’d held a guitar in my hands was at Jake’s funeral. If I closed my eyes, I could almost hear the symphony of weeping and or smell the sickening sweet aroma of all the flowers.
“Noah?” Maddie questioned.
“Uh, I’m sorry…I haven’t played in a while,” I replied as I started strumming a few opening chords. As I focused on the music, I tried desperately to push away the suffocating pain ricocheting through my chest at the thought of Jake and his funeral.
Instead, I focused on entertaining Josh. With rapt attention, he kept his eyes on me for most of the song. Of course, they started drooping by the end of the first chorus, and by the end of the song, he was asleep. I glanced up at Maddie. A strange look flickered in her eyes before she smiled at me. “Thanks,” she whispered.
“No problem,” I replied.
She motioned me towards the kitchen where we could talk. “I’m really sorry about your clothes and all. I can wash them for you if you want,” she offered.
“Really, it’s not a big deal at all, so please don’t apologize. Things like that happen when you’re sick.”
“Yeah, they do.”
I shifted on my feet before nervously raking my hand through my hair. “Listen Maddie, I came over here because I wanted to ask you something.”
“You did?”
I nodded. “My mom is getting married two weeks from Saturday, and I wanted to know if you’d like to go with me.”
Her eyes widened as she gazed skeptically at me. “As your date?”
“Of course.”
“Sure, I’d love to,” she replied with a smile.
“Great.”
“So does this mean you’re okay with the wedding and all?”
Leave it to Maddie to always play Dr. Phil. “I’m still not thrilled with the prospect, but I’m learning to deal with it.”
“Because you know your mom will be happy?”
“Yeah, something like that.”
She nodded. “I know what you mean. My parents have so much going on with Josh and with…” She hesitated like she was going to say something but then thought the better of it. “I just try to think of things I can do to make them happier, but it’s hard.” She smiled ruefully. “That’s why I work so hard to keep my act together—the last thing they need is me worrying them.”
I bit my lip before I finally asked her what was on my mind. “Um, Maddie, is there something besides Josh’s illness going on?”
Playing with the hem of her t-shirt, she asked, “What do you mean?”
“You’re just acting a little funny—like about your parents being gone. I just wondered if everything was okay.”
She sighed. “No, it’s not okay. It’s about my brother.”
“Josh?”
“No, my older brother, Jace.”
My eyebrows rose in surprise. “I didn’t know you had a brother. Is he away at college or something?”
Pain flickered on Maddie’s face. “No, he’s in Charter Peachford for drug addiction.”
I swayed a little on my feet. Pastor Dan had a son who was a drug addict? The idea was almost too hard to comprehend. Maddie and Josh were practically Stepford Children. It was hard believing there was a bad seed in the perfect Parker gene pool.
“I’m sorry, Maddie. I didn’t know.”
“It’s okay.”
“How long has been an addict?” I asked.
“On and off for five years. He started experimenting when he was fifteen, and it went from there. He hit the really hard stuff about a year and a half ago. After he lost his scholarship dropped out of college, we finally did an intervention, kinda like that show on TV.”
I nodded.
“That’s when he went into treatment. But he’ll stay for a while and then leave. He comes home and tells us he’s better, but he’s really not. Mom and Dad refuse to let him come around anymore because it’s too hard on Josh—both physically and emotionally.” Maddie sighed. “It’s hard on all of us.”
I reached over to tenderly rub her cheek. “I’m so sorry, Maddie.”
The moment I touched her, she jumped like she’d been shocked. We stared at each other, barely blinking or breathing. Finally, Maddie murmured, “Thanks.”
I wanted to say more, but I didn’t know what. “If you ever need to talk, I’m here.”
She gave me a weak smile. “That’s sweet of you, Noah. I appreciate it.”
I nodded, but my heart ached for her at that moment. I wanted so much to help her—to take the worry and burden off of her, but I didn’t know how. More than anything, I wanted to draw her into my arms—to somehow physically shield her from all the sorrow surrounding her. But I didn’t. Instead, I shoved my hands in my pockets to keep from touching her.
“Well, I guess I better go. Tell your mom and dad I said hello, okay?”
“I will. Thanks again for everything.” She handed me the bag with my puke clothes that were utterly reeking.
As I headed out to my Jeep, my mind was whirling. Josh’s face flashed before my mind, then Maddie’s, and then the Parker’s. The more I thought about it, the more I wanted to do something for Josh. I wanted to be his personal Make a Wish Foundation. I tried thinking of something that would blow him away, and then it hit me.
He was a baseball fanatic, and there was nothing more he would want than to meet his idol. The more my mind raced with emotions, I thought about the cash strapped Parker’s, and I wanted to do something for them. In the end, all roads led to Mr. Baseball himself, Joe Preston.
The last time I’d seen my father I was seven. He was on a four-day game stint in Atlanta and staying at a friend’s house on Lake Lanier. He’d asked Mom if he could have me come and stay with him. It was the longest I’d ever been with him. Up until that point in my life, he’d drop in for a couple of hours at a time, play with me a little, and then bail.
I remember being absolutely beside myself with excitement as Mom packed up my clothes in my Power Rangers suitcase. Even Jake was pumped about my dad’s visit. “Will you get me his autograph?” he’d asked.
But as bouncing off the walls as I was, I didn’t notice that Mom wasn’t sharing in my excitement. I would never forget the look on her face when my dad came to pick me up in a BMW convertible with a curvy blonde in the front seat. I might’ve been a kid, but I did appreciate the fact Tiffany wore low cut shirts and short skirts the entire weekend!
It was a whirlwind four days that would’ve been any kids dream—going to the baseball park every day, staying up late, going to the zoo, the movies, getting to swim in the lake, and riding through the city with the top down.
My dad took me to meet the team, and I even got to hang out in the dugout during batting practice. It was the first time in my life someone said, “Damn, Joe, he’s the spitting image of you!” I did look like my father, but it was something no one in my family would ever acknowledge. Poor Mom—it must’ve been a double edged sword to love someone so much who looked like someone you hated.
I ate my weight in junk food. Unlike Mom, my dad never harped on me to eat vegetables, and I got ice cream at every meal—even if I didn’t clean my plate. It was absolute heaven, and I didn’t want it to end. When it was time to go, I pitched a fit and cried like a spoiled little brat.
My dad knelt down beside me. “Hey kid, don’t cry. We’ll do this again real soon, I promise.”
I nodded my head, but I was unsure if I really believed him. Mom came to pick me up at the lake house. Dad leaned over and kissed her on the cheek and told her how beautiful she looked. He said something about the two of them getting together the next time he was in town, but Mom didn’t reply. Now that I’m older, I realize what the douche bag was alluding to about getting together. Yeah, nothing like a booty call with the mother of your child.
On the way home, I talked ninety miles a minute, filling my mom in on every detail—well, everything that wouldn’t get me in trouble like the ice cream and staying up late. She would smile and nod as I described every moment of the four days. Finally, when I was finished, I looked over at her. Huge, silent tears dripped off her face.
And then something turned over in me. I wasn’t mad at Mom for crying at all my excitement. Somehow even at seven, I realized how much he’d hurt her. She wasn’t trying to be selfish—she was just a twenty-three year old girl still desperately in love with the prick who’d knocked her up and dumped her.
The more I thought about it, I realized she’d been the one who’d gotten up with me during the night, who’d rocked me for hours when I was sick or cranky, who’d sing to me when I was scared, and kiss the bruises to make them go away. She’d sacrificed everything for me—her friends, her dating life, stretch marks…the whole nine yards.
So I vowed then and there that unless my father wanted both of us, I’d never speak to him again. Mom argued with me over and over again. “Noah, Mommy is okay with you going to see your daddy, I promise. Please don’t do this!” she’d beg when I’d refuse his phone calls. She even forced me to talk to him a few times, but Granddaddy told her it wasn’t a good idea to do that to me.
Finally, my dad stopped calling me. He would talk to Mom occasionally. So, like I did with everything else, I pushed the pain deep inside. I turned to my Granddaddy and to my uncles, and they became everything I needed—for a while. But I couldn’t run anymore. I was almost a man, and I needed to face the skeletons of my past.
When I got home, I found the house dark. I breathed a sigh of relief to find the cheek pincher gone. There was a note on the counter.
Noah,
Greg and I have gone to have dinner at the Country Club and to finalize the menu for the
reception. There’s some leftover chicken casserole in the fridge if you get hungry.
Love ya,
Mom
I was kind of glad I had the house all to myself. I needed absolute quiet and privacy for what I was about to do. Without turning on any lights, I padded down the hallway to the office. On the desk was my mother’s black address book. Flipping through the pages, I stopped when I got to the P’s.
My heart pounded in my ears, and my fingertips were so sweaty I could barely dial the numbers. When I finished, I shakily brought the receiver to my ear. He answered on the third ring. “Hello?”
For a moment, I couldn’t find my voice. I sat paralyzed in the desk chair, trembling all over like a little girl. Get it together, dickwad! I thought to myself.
Finally, I mustered my strength. “Uh, hey, you don’t really know me, but this is Noah—your son.”
***