“I need these,” she explained, suddenly timid. She withdrew her spectacles from his inside pocket and fit them on her face. It felt good to put the room in focus.
She only wished the lenses could help her make Colin out. Just what had he been doing downstairs? Trying to end their journey here? Perhaps he’d had enough of her and Francine and had decided he’d rather sponge off the duke’s generosity at Winterset Grange until his birthday.
“It’s the Shilling Club,” he said. “We play with shillings, but they stand for a hundred pounds each.”
“A hundred pounds? Each?” She felt faint. She pressed a hand to her brow. “But how will we—”
“We won’t.” He removed the waistcoat and set it aside. “I always lose, I never pay. They know I’ll be good for it in the end.”
“But why lose at all? I could make out your cards on that last hand. They were better than the duke’s. You let him win.”
He tugged loose his cravat and slung it over the back of a chair. “Yes, well . . . everyone loves a gracious loser. That’s why I’m always welcome at any card table, any evening, here or in London. I have no shortage of friends.”
“Friends.” She spat the word. “What makes people like that your friends? The fact that they’ll allow you to sit at their table and lose heaps of money? That hardly fits any definition of friendship I know.”
He didn’t answer. Merely sat on the edge of the bed to remove his boots.
“They don’t respect you, Colin. How could they? They don’t know you at all. Not the real you.”
“And what makes you an expert on the real me?”
“I suppose I’m not. I’m not even certain you know who you are. You just become whomever the situation requires.”
He kicked his boots aside and passed wordlessly into a connecting room. Presumably a dressing or bathing area. She heard the sounds of water splashing into a basin.
She raised her voice. “I mean, I am beginning to notice a pattern. All your guises are variations on the same theme. The charming, fun-loving rogue with the not-so-deeply hidden pain. Obviously, it works for you nicely. But doesn’t it grow tiresome?”
“Tiresome indeed.” He strolled back into the room with his hair damp and his shirt untucked and cuffed to the elbows. “Min, please. I’m a little drunk and extremely fatigued. Can we hold the rest of this character dissection for the morning?”
She released a sigh. “I suppose.”
“Then get in bed. I’m exhausted.”
With a bit of contortion, she managed to undo the hooks at the back of her gown. She drew the tattered, wine-stained silk down over her hips and cast it aside on the chaise longue. The thought that she had nothing else to wear tomorrow was lowering indeed. At least in the morning, she could ring for a proper bath. For now, she did her best with the washbasin and soap.
After rebuttoning her shift, she lay down on the bed next to him, staring up at the ceiling.
A few minutes passed.
“You’re not sleeping,” she said.
“Neither are you.”
She bit her lip. Something lay heavy on her mind, and she didn’t have anyone else to tell. “He doesn’t know me, either.”
His reply was groggy. “Who doesn’t?”
“Sir Alisdair Kent.” At the mention of his name, she felt the sudden tensing from Colin’s side of the bed. “I mean, he knows of my scientific findings, and he admires my intellect. But he doesn’t know the real me. I’ve conducted all my Society business through written correspondence, and I’ve always signed myself M. R. Highwood. So Sir Alisdair . . . well, he thinks I’m a man.”
Several moments passed.
“He’s in for a great surprise.”
She giggled up at the ceiling. “Indeed he is.” Whether it would be a pleasant or unpleasant surprise, she was afraid to guess.
“But that’s odd, “ he said. “There was genuine affection in that letter.”
“Mere friendly interest, I’m sure.”
“I’m not so convinced. Perhaps he’s in love with you.”
Her heart gave a queer flutter. Not at the idea, but at the sound of that word from his lips: love.
“How could that be?” She rolled onto her side, bending her elbow and propping her head with her hand. “Didn’t you hear what I just said? Sir Alisdair thinks I’m a man.”
“Oh, I heard you.” Devilish eyes slid to meet hers. “Perhaps he thinks you’re a man, and he’s in love with you. Poor fellow has some heartbreak ahead of him, if so.”
She frowned, unsure of his implications.
He chuckled low. “Don’t listen to me, pet. My bollocks are aching, and my pride is smarting. I’m foxed, and I’m feeling very wicked tonight. If you know what’s best for you, you’ll ignore me and go to sleep.”
“Why are your bollocks aching?” She sat up. “Were you injured somehow? Was it the highwayman?”
With a groan, he threw his wrist over his eyes. “My dear girl, you might be a brilliant geologist, but your grasp of biology is dim indeed.”
She dropped her gaze to the front of his breeches. They were impressively tented.