Chapter 29
Evie woke with the sensation that Lucas was in the room with her. Not just in the room – that he was in the bed with her, with his arms wrapped tight around her waist. She stayed absolutely still, keeping her eyes scrunched shut. If she lay just so, with the pillow wedged against her back, she could pretend she was pressed against his chest. A blinding somersault of butterflies took flight in her stomach for a blissful moment, before voices from the other room pricked her waking dream and it burst.
She swung her legs heavily off the bed and sat up, stretching out her limbs. She didn’t know how to let Lucas go. It was as simple as that. Even if she’d wanted to, she didn’t know how.
Jamieson and Flic were busy making breakfast when she wandered through into the kitchen. She noticed the time. It was late morning. Damn. She pulled her phone out of the back pocket of her jeans. A dozen missed calls. Eight from Cyrus – most in the last hour. There were several messages too, all from her mother. She opened the last one. An angry demand to know when she was thinking of coming home. She couldn’t think about replying yet. Instead, with a shaking hand she called Cyrus’s phone.
He picked up on the first ring. ‘Where are you?’ he demanded.
‘Are you OK?’ she asked at the same time.
He hesitated, ‘Kind of. We’re fine. Nothing’s happened. I just … I need to see you. Now.’
‘OK,’ Evie said, pausing a second. ‘I’m staying with Lucas’s sister and her boyfriend.’
There was a brief pause on the end of the phone, then: ‘OK, I’ll come to you.’
She gave him the address.
‘I’ll be there in ten,’ he said before hanging up.
Cyrus was there in eight minutes. She felt the buzz from him competing with the caffeine in her veins and jumped instantly off the kitchen stool, getting to the front door before he could knock.
‘Hey,’ she said, looking up at him. He hadn’t shaved. Darkish blonde stubble was shadowing his jaw.
‘Hey,’ he said back, raking a hand through his unkempt hair. His cheeks were flushed.
‘You want to come in?’ she asked, stepping aside. This was weird. He seemed embarrassed to see her – awkward – as though he didn’t know where to look.
‘Sure,’ Cyrus mumbled, his eyes darting over her shoulder.
She could sense his reticence, his hyper-alertness as they walked down the hallway towards the living room. His body was responding to Flic and Jamieson’s presence.
Evie was more accustomed to the sensation, having been around Lucas so long and so intimately, but Cyrus’s instincts were putting him on full alert: his heart was beating faster, his breathing running shallower. He was scanning the hallway, looking for exits, his fingers flying instinctively to his waist, checking his weapon. For an instant Evie wanted to take his hand and tell him to relax, but then again she quite enjoyed seeing Cyrus out of his comfort zone. It happened so rarely.
Flic and Jamieson fell silent as they walked into the living room.
Evie took a deep breath. ‘Cyrus,’ she said, ‘this is Flic and Jamieson.’
‘Shifter?’ Cyrus asked, looking at Jamieson.
Evie arched an eyebrow. Good introduction, way to go, she thought. But then, she didn’t know why she was surprised. The old Cyrus hadn’t exactly been a fan of unhumans.
‘Yeah,’ Jamieson said, getting up slowly from the sofa and extending a hand towards Cyrus, his expression wary but also half-amused.
Evie watched carefully, wondering what Cyrus’s reaction would be. Before, his only physical contact with unhumans had been when he ran a sword through one.
He shook Jamieson’s hand though, appraising him, as though he half expected Jamieson to shift there and then.
Flic stood up and offered her hand too.
Cyrus shook it.
‘Has Evie told you we’re joining your little army?’ Flic asked.
An instant frown. ‘No, she’s not said anything,’ Cyrus said, shooting Evie a brief look before turning back to Flic. ‘But if you fight anything like I hear your brother did then I’m glad to have you on our side.’
Flic smiled, a little taken aback, and Cyrus turned to Evie. He cleared his throat and looked at the ground. ‘I need to talk to you,’ he said, then added quickly, ‘in private.’
Evie hesitated. Why was he acting so weird? And was he actually blushing? She could feel Flic and Jamieson staring at her, undoubtedly with raised eyebrows. As if she knew what Cyrus wanted. And it wasn’t like that. Hell. As if.
She took Cyrus by the arm and pulled him out into the corridor. ‘Let’s go outside,’ she muttered. ‘Shadow Warriors have got good hearing.’
‘What? What is it?’ Evie asked, the moment they were outside.
Cyrus swallowed, looked away, exhaled loudly.
Evie braced herself to hear the worst, for him to tell her something had happened to Vero or Ash.
‘Why did I do it?’ Cyrus suddenly asked.
Evie shook her head, completely thrown. ‘Excuse me?’
‘Was I in love with you?’
‘What?’ Evie spluttered.
‘Why else did I sacrifice myself,’ Cyrus asked, ‘unless I was in love with you?’
Evie laughed so loud it came out as a snort through her nose. When she’d recovered she straightened her face and tried to figure a way of putting it nicely. ‘The old Cyrus didn’t know what love was.’
He frowned at her. ‘Then why else did I do it?’
Why was he asking her? What did she know of Cyrus’s feelings? ‘Chivalry?’ she suggested, hoping he’d accept that and move on.
He shook his head though. ‘It sounds like I didn’t know what chivalry was either.’
She didn’t answer, just wrapped her arms tighter around herself.
He took a half-step towards her. ‘I feel something when I’m around you,’ he said.
Evie stood fixated for a second by the brown slash across his iris. ‘You feel that around all Hunters – it’s normal,’ she finally managed to say. ‘It’s confusing at first, until you get used to it.’
Cyrus shook his head defiantly. ‘Well, I don’t feel it around Ash. Or Vero. Or any of the others.’
And suddenly he was right there, pressing her against the wall and Evie could feel the pressure building, the need for air growing, but she couldn’t look away.
‘I know you’re still messed up,’ he said, almost whispering, their faces so close their lips were almost brushing, ‘and I’m not expecting you to give me anything. I’m just trying to understand what my feelings were.’
She drew in a breath, trying to force her heartbeat back under control. ‘Believe me, you weren’t in love with me. You wanted to sleep with me, yes, but you definitely weren’t in love with me.’
He fell back as if she’d pushed him, looking at her as if he didn’t fully believe her.
But seriously. Love? Cyrus? The two words were oxymoronic. She’d had to explain to him what love was. God, she’d practically needed flash cards, the concept was so impossible for him to get his head around.
‘Was that it?’ she asked. ‘Was that why you came all the way here? To ask me if you were in love with me?’
‘Um, yeah,’ he said, still frowning at the sidewalk.
‘But we cleared it up, right?’ she asked, edging around him and heading back to the door. Honestly, this was not a conversation she’d ever expected to have with Cyrus of all people.
‘Yeah, we cleared it up,’ he said, raising his head and looking at her. ‘No love. Got it.’
‘So, we’re, um, good then?’ she asked, yanking open the door and heading back inside.
‘Yeah, we’re good,’ he mumbled to her back.