Josephine felt awful. ‘I didn’t mean it how it came out, Michael, but I’m so worried about her. You need to get out there again and retrace her steps, there has to be someone who knows something.’
Michael interrupted his wife. He was still furious with her for losing them the only lead they’d had with the letter. How could she kid herself like this? ‘Are you having a fucking laugh? I’ve been out there looking for her since she first went AWOL. Unlike you, of course, Josephine, who still can’t bring yourself to leave your fucking bedroom. Who has sat here on your arse the whole time, drinking wine and watching your DVDs to take your mind off it all, and couldn’t even open a fucking letter! It’s a joke, Josephine. Your whole life is a fucking joke. This is your fault. Your life is what helped our Jessie to go off the rails. You always pretended everything was all right, but it wasn’t, Josephine. How dare you even try to tell me what I should be doing, when you have done fuck-all! You really can’t see how hard it’s been for me, can you? Watching you waste your life away up here like a fucking character from a storybook. It’s a fucking excuse of a life, Josephine, it has been for years. And it’s cost us our daughter.’
The pain Michael had caused his wife with his words was evident. She was white-faced, her eyes so big and wide she looked like a bush baby. He had hurt her badly, but he didn’t care. His daughter, for all she might be, was missing and could be dead, and he couldn’t play this game with his wife any more. He was sick of pretending that everything was normal. He couldn’t protect her from the truth any more – he didn’t want to. Josephine needed a reality check, and it had been a long time coming.
As she dropped her eyes from his, and turned away from him – acting like she was the only one of them who was hurting – he felt his anger building up inside his chest once more. She really knew how to play the victim.
‘Do you know what, Josephine? I can see what you’re doing, acting the innocent, as always. Poor old Josephine, who can’t be expected to do anything useful, not with all her problems, eh? Well, do you know what? You can go and fuck yourself because, unlike you, I’ve done everything in my power to locate Jessie. I know that and, more to the fucking point, you know that.’
Josephine Flynn was aware that she had finally used up all the goodwill that her husband had always shown to her. She was feeling thoroughly ashamed of herself. She had always known that Michael had given her more love than she had ever deserved from him. He had been losing patience with her for a while now, and she didn’t know how to make it better, how to make him understand that she couldn’t help herself, that she hated herself for her weakness.
‘Please, Michael . . .’
He turned away from her, waving his arms in dismissal. ‘I can’t listen to you, Josephine. I’m sorry, but I’ve got to go.’
Chapter One Hundred
and Nineteen
Declan wasn’t sure if he was doing the right thing, but he couldn’t, in all good conscience, ignore the woman’s request for a meeting any longer. Nor could Michael either – he was already on his way to the meet.
She had contacted him personally, and she had waited a long time to be heard, refusing to discuss her business with anyone but Michael. She had been ringing his offices for over a week, but hadn’t explained why. Declan had finally called her back, and realised from her tone she might have important information.
He smiled at the woman sitting opposite him, sipping her cup of tea, and she smiled back at him, a serene smile, that made him feel better about everything. No matter what the outcome might be, she was at least being genuine. What more could anyone ask for?
Michael arrived at the address he had been given by Declan, and he parked his Range Rover carefully outside the house in question. This was his old stomping ground; he had grown up round the corner from this street, and he was pleased to see the change in it. East London was now a desirable place to reside. The houses that were once barely one step above slums, were now changing hands for exorbitant amounts of money. It was a fucking joke – everyone else dreamt of getting away from the area; now it seemed certain people were determined to buy a property there. Wonders would never cease.
He was already feeling guilty about turning on Josephine, even though he knew she had been asking for it for a long time. But he did love her, and he felt as much to blame for the way she lived as she was, because he had never once challenged her about her lifestyle. Until now.