Chapter 17
Are you out of your mind?” Seth growled as they hunched in the cold between the cover of several buggies.
Jacob sighed. “Look—the girl’s horse was lame, in distress. What was I supposed to do?”
“And you’re sure of that. Sure that Kate Zook didn’t plan this just to set another snare for you?”
Jacob stopped. He tried to think. He’d come out of the lane and hadn’t gone more than a few hundred feet when his sharp eyes caught the glare of a buggy wheel just off the road. He’d pulled over and found Kate Zook standing huddled next to her horse and buggy, stroking the horse’s mane.
“I don’t think so, Seth. Her horse was obviously in distress. Favoring his right front. He had an abscess. He can’t be pulling a buggy with an abscess.”
“You could have sent her down to our house. Daed would have seen to the horse.”
“I did, but I was already so late.”
“You waited until the last minute with that mare, didn’t you? You could have let Daed take care of her. It’s not like he doesn’t know what he’s doing.”
Jacob hung his head.
“You still might have been able to make it. What did you do?”
“I was waiting for Kate. She had gone inside to warm up.”
Seth said nothing, just continued to glare at him.
“I was trying to be nice. I certainly couldn’t let her walk home in this weather. I didn’t know what to do.”
“Something else, Jacob. Anything else. Do you know how great that performance was by those kids? How long it probably took Lilly to get it ready—and with planning her wedding besides?”
“I know.”
“Nee, you don’t. You don’t think, and that’s what’s got you into this mess in the first place. But worse than that, you’re dragging Lilly into it with you too. And she deserves better.”
“Seth, I’ve seen you go through girls by the dozen.”
“This isn’t just any girl, Jacob. She’s going to be your wife— your wife—in two days. And you just humiliated her in front of everyone.”
Jacob had had enough. “All right. I get the point. I’ll go and see her.”
“And she’ll forgive you, because that’s who she is. Well, bruder, I’ll tell you the truth, you don’t deserve that forgiveness. None of it.” Seth turned and walked off, leaving Jacob struggling to contain his emotions.
Lilly gave a forlorn tug at the paper chain of red and green, breathing in the silence of the schoolroom now that everyone had gone. She always stayed behind for a few minutes to tidy up the decorations. She found it made the class ready to move on after the turn of the New Year and Second Christmas when the students returned. She tried to concentrate on a clump of dried white paste that had fallen to the floor and bent to scratch it off with her fingernail. Her nose began to run as her eyes welled with tears. There was no denying it; the image of Jacob’s set face and Kate’s triumphant smile had robbed the joy from the afternoon’s program. She had so wanted him to come. And for him to miss the performance because of the awful Kate Zook. She rose and tossed the paste and paper into the waste, remembering that Mrs. Loftus was waiting with her mother. She turned to find her cape, prepared to go home, then recalled that she didn’t have a ride.
“I missed it. I’m sorry, Lilly.”
Her breath caught in her chest as she looked up to see Jacob standing in the doorway.
“Jah, you missed it.” She kept her voice steady and wiped at her cheeks.
He sighed aloud and closed the door behind him, walking into the room.
“So, Seth’s a little protective of you. He took me to task for not being here.”
She shrugged. “It seems to be his nature. He’s caring.”
“And maybe I’m not?”
“That isn’t what I meant. Look, Jacob, please just go.” She concentrated on stuffing her satchel with books.
“Lilly. Kate’s horse went lame. I had to stop and help her. The animal was in pain. I had every intention of being here for you.”
“It seems like Kate Zook has a lot of pressing needs where you’re concerned.”
“I know that … I know she probably arranged to be there, waiting for me.”
“With a lame horse?”
He shrugged. “Maybe. Maybe she’s foolish and selfish enough to drive an animal that way.”
“To get your attention?”
He sighed. “I don’t know what to say. I thought I was doing the right thing. The horse needed help either way.”
“Well, it might have done you better to have helped the horse and let the girl get lame—walking.”
“I know.” His boot steps echoed in the stillness of the room as he approached her desk.
“I find that hard to believe. You don’t know how I felt. I was embarrassed and furious—and jealous.”
“Well, of course you’d feel that way.” His voice was soothing but she was not in the mood to be placated. “I make you a promise, to a special invitation, and then I go gallivanting past with another girl in my buggy—two days before we’re to marry.”
She lifted her eyes to his. “It’s not my business who rides in your buggy. You don’t owe me anything. We both know this wedding is just a—just a sham. It’s still not too late for you to back out.”
“I thought we were becoming friends.” His voice was low, questioning, vulnerable.
For an instant, Lilly almost gave in. She really did want to become his wife. She blew out a breath of frustration. “What do you want me to say, Jacob? That you’re forgiven for rescuing Kate for the second time? Fine, you’re forgiven.”
She moved to step past him, but he blocked her way with the bulk of his body. She almost ran into his chest and caught the fresh scent that seemed to drift from the skin of his throat. She arched her neck to meet his eyes and found them gold and intense. She took a step back.
“I didn’t want to help Kate. I told you; she bothers me, like fleas on a dog.” He sounded so glum that the urge to smile at him bubbled up inside of her. She ducked her head, but not before he’d seen her face.
“Ach, don’t smile, Lilly Lapp. That would mean that you believe me, that you trust me even.” He reached out one large hand and skimmed it along the sleeve of her blouse, past the bandages on her arm, to catch at her hand.
She stared down at her hand in his. His touch was warm, strong. She struggled to guard her expression, then gave in fully to the smile. “I believe you,” she said, her voice low and quiet.
He let go of her hand to lift her chin so that she was forced to look up at him once more. She felt nervous and jittery, and she wet her lips as she tried to think of something else to say.
“Danki for trusting me. And, I am not backing out of our marriage. You’ve got me, Lilly, for all our lives, as Derr Herr allows.” He bent his head and kissed her forehead; a casual, almost brotherly kiss that somehow left her frustrated and tense.
He stepped back and she watched him look around the classroom. The only thing that remained from the program was the class quilt, strung across the windows.
“I missed the program. So, give me my own performance, Miss Lapp. Tell me about the quilt. Or you can sing to me. I like ‘Silent Night.’”
“There can be no performance without the children.”
“Is there anything you can show me?”
“Well, I’m especially proud of the quilt this year. The students did the top and several of the mothers finished it.”
He smiled as he stared at the profusion of trees. “Do you remember making a class quilt when we were in school?”
Lilly tried to concentrate and recollect what square he might have made for a quilt. He laughed when she didn’t speak.
“Maybe I should ask if you remember me from school.”
“Jah, of course I do.” She paused, hoping he wouldn’t ask about her thoughts of him then.
“I bet you thought I was a wild one, a little on the bad side, maybe?”
She flushed. “Well, understanding what I do now about your reading, I know why you acted out. Besides, Miss Stahley was a bit on in years and was not the most pleasant of teachers.”
“She was an old bat.”
“Jacob!” A giggle rose in her throat despite her admonishment. Miss Stahley had been especially hard on him.
“She kept me out of the class quilt my last year in school. Do you remember that?”
Lilly lost her smile, appalled at what he’d said. “Nee, how could she do that?”
He turned from her, still studying the tree quilt. “Ach, I wouldn’t recite what she’d asked, couldn’t really. She threw me out of class when she passed out the quilt squares, then told me later that I didn’t deserve one, that I wasn’t really part of the class.”
Lilly drew an indignant breath. “That old bat!”
He laughed, turning back to her. “All things come full circle though, don’t they? Here I am, standing in the same schoolhouse where I once was not welcome, with my own private tutor.”
Lilly felt a nervous sensation of excitement at his words. She knew then just how much she wanted to teach him to read, to try and heal the old wounds caused by a tormenting teacher.
“Well, I think our tutoring will have an additional purpose then.”
He gave her an intense look. “Perhaps it will.”
“Gut.”
He seemed at a loss for something to say, then spoke quietly. “I’ll take you home if you’re ready.”
“All right. Danki.”
She gathered up the last of her books and then had a sudden inspiration for the primer she’d promised to make him. She decided, with a secret smile, that it would be one he wasn’t likely to forget.