CHAPTER 12
To My Special Angel,
If you are reading this, it means that your mother and I are no longer with you to protect you and give you the information you so desperately need to stay safe from those who can harm you. I am so sorry that things have to be so complicated for you, and I wish now, writing this letter, that your mother and I could be with you to give you the information you need to arm yourself against the evil of the world. I am writing this because I know that the possibility of those who wish to harm us are going to show up one day, and when they do they will make sure your mother and I are not there to prevent them from getting to you.
Matalyn, there are some things about your mother and me that you need to know for your own safety. I know when you read this you will question every single line, but I swear to you that it is all true. I need you to keep an open mind and believe so that you can prevent harm from coming to you. I need you to understand that you are very special and unlike anyone else who has ever existed. From the time you were born we knew that you were very unique and that the others would stop at nothing to seek you out. We did our best to raise you like any other little girl, but I see now that didn’t even help. There is a world greater than your imagination that exists all around you, which you will begin to notice and become aware of even before you have the chance to read this letter. You will start to notice your own special abilities, and you will probably develop even more as time goes on. I am certain you do not know a fraction of the powers you possess or how to use them, but there will be others sent to help you with this. I know I’m making things even more confusing. Let me start from the beginning.
Years ago, before you were born, your mother and I lived in other places and we didn’t look the way you knew us to. She has always been so good, and her life’s goal was to do the work of the Father. Your mother was one of heaven’s angels. Her job was to try to help those who belonged on earth (humans) to make moral decisions that would keep them close to God and to influence those who had not come to know Him to do so. She was so good at what she did, always caring so much about lost souls. I don’t think there was ever anyone with a more pure heart. Your mother was difficult to look at because the light of God’s love flowed from her. She had indescribable beauty and grace. When she spoke it sounded like music, and those who heard it could not ignore her no matter how much they wanted to. She was the highest angel in her division with the task of winning souls for heaven, so it was more than a shame that she was targeted in such a heartless way.
Unfortunately, my story is one of shame and embarrassment. I was an angel from hell. Ruthless and uncaring, I was in charge of the leagues of hell’s angels. We were the ones responsible for unleashing the demons on the earth as we saw fit to prohibit your mother, and those on her side of the war, from winning. We wanted to inflict pain and suffering on the humans. We wanted to convince them that God wasn’t real and that He never cared for anyone. Our job was to plant doubt, fear, distrust, dishonesty, and havoc into their world and their minds—to draw them toward the darkness. I was brutal and did so many horrible things. I gained rank by becoming the vilest creature anyone could imagine, as I was totally heartless and did whatever I was told, completing mission after mission handed down to me from Satan himself. Being an angel of hell came with a beauty as well. Like your mother, I was striking. However, I used this to seduce and make people fall rather than to show God’s love through me. As an angel of hell I felt no emotion, empathy, or love. To feel emotion was something only the good angels of heaven were supposed to feel, and we were to be void of that ability.
Though heaven and hell are opposite and on most levels are enemies, they do agree on a few things. One of those things is how angels are punished, but hell is normally brasher. There are several things an angel can do to get punished, such as not follow direct orders and other petty things, but major offenses require the maximum punishment. The three major offenses of heavenly angels are breaking a promise, treason, and murder. Since the beginning of time, heavenly angels who committed these crimes would have their wings removed, have their ability removed to create children or find love, and live out their immortal lives on the earth, always desperately trying to get back to the life they once had.
Later, after the Nephilim race was created, which are the children with one angel parent and one human parent, heaven added having a human mate to its list of major offenses, considering angels were never meant to have children. Hell refused to add it, finding no harm and actually benefiting from the Nephilim to a degree, because they were evil. Even with murder and broken promises, hell was lenient. The only real major offense that a hell’s angel could commit was treason, which was punishable much more harshly, even though the agreement was that all angels be punished the same.
Satan took his angels’ fate into his own hands. Though we had the permission of creating them, most of the hell’s angels felt no need to create evil children with humans that would not be immortal like they were. In later years the angels who had been punished by having their wings removed began to find pleasure in earthly things like money, gambling, fame, and other empty things that brought them pleasure. Both heaven and hell decided this was no longer a punishment, making the decision that they would change the punishment a little. They decided that rather than just take an angel’s wings, they would also take away their immortality so that when they were forced to leave and live on earth, their body would grow old like a human’s. In addition, they removed the safeguard they had put in place, allowing them to feel the same pains and discomforts a normal person feels over the course of time. What heaven failed to realize was that upon agreeing to this, how much of an effect it would have in the war they were in against each other.
You see, Mattie, hell had a game plan all along. Hell’s desire was to create a new race of super angels that would work for them to overpower the angels from heaven who were battling against them for the souls of humans. When the safeguard was removed, allowing the fallen angels to feel all human pain, that included childbirth. The safeguard prevented angel bloodlines from being passed on.
Heavenly angels have more power than hell’s angel possess, so hell wanted to create a race that would have both. Where hell’s angels have the power to seduce humans into making poor decisions that will bring pain and suffering, unleash demons to create problems for them, and manipulate them into a life of torment, heavenly angels are capable of so much more. A heavenly angel can read the thoughts of other angels that are of their kind, know when someone needs them, protect others, use heightened senses, know when there are hell’s angels near, and most importantly, call on God to assist them.
As a hell’s angel, you never have a clue when a heavenly angel is around unless they are very obvious about it. Since most of us are on a mission when we are roaming around the earth, both sides usually look like anyone else on the street. Wings stay hidden unless you make them visible, and even if you do, only other angels can see them. Since heavenly angels have white, feathered wings and hell’s angels have black, feathered wings, it would be a dead giveaway if we all walked around displaying them, so we don’t do that.
One day I received a mission from my leader that I was chosen to create the new race of angels because I had earned my rank as the leader of his armies. He told me that my mission entailed making a powerful heavenly angel fall so that she would be cast into a human body and be able to have children. He already had the angel picked out, and I was to do this without error. To this point I had never seen your mother. All I knew was I was seeking out an angel by the name of Evana and that I would be the reason she would fall. Being a loyal and very stupid angel to the worst of all angels, I took the assignment I was given without a choice.
Before I left for the earth to fulfill the task I’d been given, there were a few things I had to take care of. Though angels don’t have marriages, there are some who belong as a pair. In heaven this is a very close relationship that is equivalent to a marriage; however, in hell it is more like owning property. As previously stated, hell’s angels do not feel emotion or love about things, so to belong to someone as a hell’s angel is like you are their property and they are yours. It is surrounded by selfishness, pride, seduction, and darkness rather than love, trust, honesty, and purity, as it is when heavenly angels belong as a pair.
I belonged with another angel named Cheryl before I left hell. When she heard of my assignment and how I was to be with another to create a new race, she was furious. I didn’t care, because I had no feelings for her at all. We were simply a pair because of the status we gained. She did not want to lose me as her property and asked me to promise that I would be back to be with her. Knowing I would risk punishment if I broke the promise, I said nothing. I had every intention of returning, but being the vile creature I was, I had gotten bored with Cheryl. She left, enraged, as she began to swear and threaten that I would regret not making the promise. After leaving my second in command, Damron, in charge, I left for earth without looking back. I knew I could not return until my mission was completed.
When I saw your mother I couldn’t believe my eyes! I never imagined such beauty could exist. The beauty of hell and its beings is breathtaking, but you can always tell there is a darkness that is attached to it. There was no creature in all the world I had come from that had an ounce of the beauty your mother had. Of course, when your mother saw me, she unfurled her great, white, majestic wings as a sign of defense, giving me the message that I needed to back away and leave. But instead of leaving, I just stood right where I was. She came to me, demanding to know what I was doing and why I hadn’t retreated. I couldn’t tell her the truth, but in that moment, looking into her electric-blue eyes I had lost the ability to lie as well. So I told her how I felt in that moment.
I told her I was confused. I told her who I was and the rank I held in hell’s fleet of angels, and I told her how they had sent me on a horrible mission that I didn’t think I could complete. I told her I thought I was cursed because I knew the work I’d been doing for so long was wrong. I don’t know where it all came from or why I had said all of that to her. I hadn’t even realized I’d felt that way. Looking into her eyes made me want to be honest. I knew at that very moment I never wanted to be apart from her. I also knew that being near her was impossible; I was the enemy. I was the opposite of everything she believed in—an abomination to creatures like herself. I also knew I couldn’t go through with my mission.
Over the next several months your mother and I spent a great deal of time together and became very close to developing pecks. I had never felt the sensation before, but I knew without a shadow of a doubt that I was in love with her. I knew no matter what punishment I would receive for it that she was worth it all. At one point she finally admitted that she felt the same as I did. As joyous as it should have been, that is when everything blew up all around us. Up to that point your mother had never admitted this to herself or anyone else. Some who knew her speculated, but that’s all that it was.
Within an instant, at least a dozen angels from heaven and hell surrounded us! I had no idea what was going on. I had already told your mother everything about my mission, and she was certain that other hell’s angels would be convinced I was going through with the mission if they saw us together. What neither of us counted on was some of heaven’s angels keeping a close eye on her to prevent anything from happening to her. They heard every word when she told me she was in love with me and never wanted to leave me.
We were taken to a mutual place of judgment, as we were both accused of treason, while our fellow angels gave us looks of betrayal and disgust. Neither of us said anything to defend ourselves, knowing the charge was legitimate. I felt love that stood against everything hell was, and she fell in love with the enemy. Because something like this had never occurred before, everyone was stumped as to how it should be handled. Though heaven and hell agreed on some things, heaven always held the power to overrule hell when it came to decision-making, as good always prevails. This turned out to be in my favor, since hell wanted to have me thrown into the Lake of Fire with all the humans who ended up there upon death. Heaven intervened on my behalf, stating that I had shown love, compassion, and a change in heart, considering I sought forgiveness from God believing in Him. They told me in light of these things they were going to cut both me and your mother a break.
We would both be stripped of our wings and cast into human bodies that would feel pain and grow old, but if we continued to show the things we had shown to each other, then we would be accepted back into heaven when our time on earth was through.
The next thing your mother and I knew, we were on earth in bodies that looked the same as we had before, but they felt different. We could tell we had begun the aging process, and we could no longer feel our wings that had been on our backs. We stayed anywhere we could while I went to college so I could provide us with the things we needed. Your mother got a job with a charity during my second year of law school that let us stay there until I graduated, got my first job, and bought us a house. Your mother was so good at what she was doing at the charity that she quickly climbed the ladder of success until she was able to start her own charity.
Within a few years, that one was doing just as well as the other one. By this point I’d made a name for myself as a criminal defense attorney and gotten my own office, and things couldn’t have been going any better, or so we thought. A few weeks later we were overjoyed as well as more confused than we had ever been before when we found out that we were expecting you. Neither of us had ever been around a baby before and had no idea what to expect. As you will recall in earlier paragraphs, angels were never meant to have children and I had never had a human mate to create a Nephilim, so we were totally in the dark when it came to all of this.
In no time at all we started receiving visitors we had never seen before in our lives, but it was clear they were heavenly angels. They had all been sent to help us out with the baby situation, and while they were at it they provided us with some valuable information. Evidently when we had both been put into our human form they hadn’t removed our angel bloodlines. This fact alone was an entire game changer. This meant we had unintentionally created a new race of angel without even knowing we had that ability. It also meant that because angel blood is different than human blood, your mother would have to have a home birth and none of us could ever have our blood taken for any medical reason.
Angel blood, whether it be from heaven or hell, has strains of silver running through the red that can be seen easily, even with the naked eye, and it also has no blood type. The angels also let us know that the baby would show the abilities of both sides, as well as the abilities of humans until it acquired its wings. They said heaven would only grant the wings to our child once it showed enough strength to overcome evil and darkness. In translation, that meant that the forces of hell would be after you from the time you were born in order to have you create more of this new race of super angels. It also meant if they were able to get to you before you got your wings, they could use you to mother other angels.
Once you were born, our lives were complete. You were so amazing and couldn’t have been more perfect if you had tried! The really outrageous thing that took a lot of getting used to was how everything around you responded to your mood. When you would cry, it would always get cloudy and cover the sun. However hard you cried that is how hard it would rain. There were times when you would throw tantrums as a child during your terrible-two stage that would bring on storms of thunder and lightning! When you were happy it was always bright and sunny, and people as well as animals were always drawn to you. It was obvious even to those who knew nothing about us that there was something special about you that they had never seen before. Your mother and I always strived to teach you not to throw fits while at the same time trying to keep you content for the sake of others!
When you were three months old we discovered you were missing from your crib. We searched everywhere, but we couldn’t find you. We were so scared and frantic that we didn’t know what to do. Someone in a park alerted the police anonymously, and you were recovered, but we knew you were in more danger than you could ever have been with a random kidnapper. It came to light that Damron and Cheryl, the ones I’d known so long ago, were the ones who kidnapped you. I knew the moment I found out what their intentions were.
They wanted to take you so that they could raise you to be like those who shared their evil beliefs. Cheryl was angry that I had fallen in love with your mother, so I believe her intention was even crueler than Damron’s. I truly believe that Cheryl’s motive was to cause me pain because I had chosen good over evil and your mother over her. Damron was out to finish what I hadn’t meant to start and prove him worthy by taking on the assignment I’d been given in the first place. Knowing they would find a way out of the situation anyway, I knew there would be too many unexplained questions if they took DNA and all of the other requirements to attempt to incarcerate them.
Considering the circumstances, we agreed to drop the charges in order for people not to be suspicious of us as well once our lack of medical records and past existence in general came into question. The police were infuriated at the thought of how parents could just let suspected kidnappers go free without a question, but because they really didn’t have a concrete case against them, their hands were tied. I hated myself every day for being forced to let them walk away without any apprehension. I could do nothing without making our family a target as well, so I was between a rock and a hard place. I felt as though I was letting our little family down and allowing you to remain in danger, which one day would become yours to face, one day on your own when I was no longer able to be there to fight it for you.
After that day no one saw or heard from Cheryl or Damron again. We kept our guard up, being over protective of you and watching everyone around us to make sure there weren’t more on the assignment. We never noticed anything, but things still felt unsafe. We knew there was an angel headquarters for heavenly angels in Oceanview, so we decided to move so that you could be better protected. I never would have thought the angel headquarters would be disguised as an apartment building, but it was a great cover up! The owner let me rent an apartment to run my business out of, and your mom found another charity that was looking for someone to run it, so the move was easy.
You seemed to fit right in at school, always staying at the top of your class with excellent grades. Everything was going perfectly as planned for several years and things have gone great until recently.
We received word from a heavenly angel named Natasha a little while ago that you had been discovered. She let us know that a heavenly angel had been created specifically to pair with you and that he would be making himself known soon. She also told us that our time to be here was nearly over and that we needed to start making preparations to go. I don’t know how we will be taken, Mattie, but I know it won’t be long. I need you to know that you have angels all around you that are good and willing to help you. Don’t forget your charm bracelet. You will find it with this letter. I put them together so that you will look at it closely as you read this. If you look at the angels on your bracelet, you will realize that they are already in your life protecting you. I don’t know who they are, but you will.
I am so sorry to have to leave you without any other information other than what I have told you in this letter. I want you to understand that if I had any other choice about the matter, I would change it. Oh, there is one more thing: your guardian angel, Lorenzo, will be as close as he can be once I am gone. I have several heavenly angels working undercover to make sure everything is okay for you, so even though you may question them, they really are good, especially Allen Hearsch. He plays a really good bad guy. I also can’t tell you enough to be careful who you trust. If they try to win you over with money or try to influence you to do things you know are wrong, then they are more than likely working with the enemy!
I love you, Mattie. You truly are a very special angel,
Daddy
P.S. You can read the journal now.