10
I believe I’ve already mentioned that Skinflick was in love with his first cousin, Denise. He always had been.
She was two years younger. Skinflick talked about her all the time, often in the context of his Golden Bough bullshit. About how unfair it was that he and Denise couldn’t be together just because of some stupid American prejudice that had no basis in scientific or even historical reality, and how the Sicilians had an expression, “cousins are for cousins,” that was not only more accurate historically but also an excellent piece of advice.* “Every other f*cking thing rednecks do, Americans love,” he used to complain.
After Skinflick and I finished high school we drove across the country to Palos Verdes, south of LA, to visit her.
Denise’s father, Roger, was Skinflick’s mother’s brother. He was suspicious the moment we got there, and it didn’t help that Skinflick and Denise took every possible opportunity to sneak off—or out, or upstairs—and f*ck.
Denise’s mother, Shirl, was less of a problem, at least in that way. But in regard to hitting on me, and to getting turned on by the constant humping of her daughter by her nephew, she was a lot more of a problem. Not that I was exactly a saint.
Thankfully, it was Skinflick and Denise who Roger caught in the guesthouse, not me and Shirl. Roger exiled Skinflick from the house. Denise sobbed. In a sordid way it was romantic.
Skinflick and I backed off all the way to Florida, as if the point of our trip had been time on the beach. We had dinner with my father for a couple of nights running, which was pleasant enough. Silvio was selling boats and real estate at the time, and was in a phase of his life where he kept smiling and spreading his hands and saying, “Who can know about these things? Tell me that.” He may still be in that phase. Last time I spoke to him was when he came to visit me in jail during my trial.*
Skinflick, meanwhile, continued to bitch and moan about Denise for the rest of the summer—even, charmingly, while we were out with other women.
He also continued to fail to progress athletically. His father kept urging me to teach him to fight, but Skinflick was naturally terrible at combat sports. He would try to protect his face and stomach by twisting away, which exposed his spine, his kidneys, and the back of his skull. His reflexes were good, but without willpower they just made him flinchy.
Skinflick and I had changed our minds about continuing with school by then and enrolled at Northern New Jersey Community College. We were living in a condo together in Bergen County. We both continued to laugh off Skinflick’s klutziness, since at that point I still respected him for other reasons.
I saw Denise three more times. Once was in the lobby of a hotel in midtown Manhattan before she and Skinflick went upstairs to f*ck. I don’t remember what year that was. The second and third times were in August of 1999, on the night before and then the night of her wedding.
This was four and a half years after I had gone to Poland. In the meantime I had finished my two-year degree at Northern New Jersey Community College (which Skinflick had left after one year), helped Skinflick run a “record label” (paid for by David Locano) into the ground (it was called Rap Sheet Records, good luck finding anything), and went with Skinflick to work as a paralegal at David Locano’s four-partner law firm, from which we were subsequently fired by a vote of the three other partners, apparently for spending too much money entertaining clients while not doing anything else. Fair enough.
At the time David Locano was still maintaining to both of us that he didn’t want Skinflick to join the mafia. Which was probably even true, to the extent that any father can really want his child to surpass him or be different from him. But to warn us about what the life was like, and as a penalty for flunking out of the law firm, he sent us to work at a garbage truck dispatch facility in Brooklyn. And it’s hard to see that as anything but a Very Bad Move.
For one thing, it wasn’t much of a penalty. It was dreary and boring, but it was easy. It gave you a lot of time off. And it was impossible to get fired from, since all we were getting paid for was being connected to David Locano.
Also, some of the lowlifes, particularly the nostalgic ones, were interesting. Grown men named Sally Knockers or Joey Camaro,* who cowered in front of the blow-dried scumbags who came by doo, free ties a week to pick up half the take. Some of the scumbags were interesting too.
Kurt Limme comes to mind. Limme was about ten years older than we were. He was undeniably handsome, and well dressed for real, not goombah. He seemed like an uncle you might have in Manhattan who was making a killing as a stockbroker and f*cking a lot of women. In reality he was under indictment for a series of extortion schemes involving the installation of cell phone relay towers, but even that seemed to be relatively forward thinking.
Skinflick fixated on him as a guy who was as cool, cynical, and relaxed—if not quite as smart—as Skinflick was. And who had made it. Limme, meanwhile, being the breakout member of a traditionally low level mob family, appreciated being worshipped by David Locano’s son.
Limme started taking Skinflick with him on his endless errands in the city, which seemed to me to be mostly shopping trips. I knew I should have been discouraging Skinflick from hanging out with him so much, since among other things Skinflick did a lot of cocaine when he was with Limme, but I had started working jobs for David Locano regularly, and was glad Skinflick had someone to entertain him in my absence.
Regarding the actual jobs, I’m not going to say too much. I can’t.
I will say that if it so happened that I killed a dozen or so people—people I wouldn’t be able to talk about now, because the DA didn’t know about them so they weren’t part of my immunity agreement—then these would have been the years during which I did it. Not that I’m saying I did. I’m saying if.
Furthermore, if I killed these people—if, motherf*cking if—I would have made sure that every one of them was some truly evil f*ck. A guy who, if you knew he was out there, would make you want to keep your family in a bank vault. David Locano would have known better than to offer me anything else.
And—last point—I would have done every single one of those jobs right. No shell casings, no latents, no alibi gaps. No bodies, even, for most of them. So don’t even try.
But anyway.
Skinflick and I were still working in trash-haul, at least on paper, when he found out Denise was getting married.
Elisabeth Kübler-Ross at one point said that our comprehension of death passes through five distinct stages—denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance.* When Skinflick got the news about Denise, he went straight to sullen and irritable, then started losing weight and spending a lot of time alone.
As it was, between the girls, the drugs, Kurt Limme, and the fact that we both had other places to stay (I still had my grandparents’ house, he had his parents’), I wasn’t seeing all that much of him anyway, even though we kept our two-bedroom condo in Demarest. But in the week before Denise’s wedding, Skinflick failed to show up to work even once, and I didn’t run into him anywhere else, either. And on the night before the wedding, Kurt Limme called me.
“Pietro, have you seen Skinflick?” he said.
“No. He didn’t come to work this week.”
“I saw him about three days ago.”
It so happened that I had had lunch with David Locano a day earlier, because he was worried about Limme’s influence on Skinflick, so I knew Locano hadn’t seen Skinflick for a while either. “He’s probably staying with some girl,” I said.
“Not with Denise getting married,” Limme said.
“Good point.”
“I’m worried about him, Pietro.”
“Why?” I asked. “How much coke did he have on him?”
Limme said, “I don’t do cocaine or know anybody who does.”
“Chill out,” I said. “I just want to know if he’s in trouble.”
There was a pause. “Yeah, he might be,” Limme said.
“All right. If I hear anything, I’ll call you.”
“Thanks, Pietro.”
“Yeah.”
Twenty minutes later the phone rang. I figured it was Limme again, but it was Skinflick.
Slurred. “Where are you?” he said.
“I’m at home. You called me.”
“Yeah, I was trying all the numbers. Dress up. I’m coming over in a limo. I’ve got a girl for you.”
I looked at the clock. It was only nine, but whatever this was sounded bad.
“I don’t know,” I said. “Hello?”
He’d hung up.
The inside of the limo was like a nightclub lit by penlights, and it took me a moment after I got in to adjust to the darkness. On the squishy leather couch at the back were Skinflick—glistening and pale except beneath his eyes—and Denise. Next to me, facing them, was a young blonde with good posture and strangely muscular bare shoulders and a broad neck. I later found out she’d swum competitively in college, which had ended for her three months earlier.
Skinflick was in a tuxedo with the shirt open. Denise was in a black sheath. The blonde’s dress was weirder: green satin. “Jesus,” I said, leaning over to kiss Denise as the car started up. “I didn’t realize it was prom night.”
“You look good enough, honey,” Denise said. “This is Lisa.”
“Hi Lisa.”
Lisa kissed my cheek and breathed hot alcohol on me, saying she’d heard a lot about me.
“You too,” I lied.
“Lisa’s the maid of honor,” Skinflick said.
“No shit,” I said.
Skinflick keyed the intercom. “Georgie—you know where we’re going?”
“Yes sir, Mr. Locano.”
“Where are we going?” I asked, as we started moving.
“It’s a surprise,” Skinflick said.
I looked at Lisa, who had “weak link” written all over her as far as information pumping went, but she just shrugged at me as she leaned toward where Denise was holding out a coke spoon for her. It was a weird moment.
The limo turned north at the first big intersection, so the Midtown Tunnel was out. Denise scooped some coke for me as Skinflick licked a joint closed.
“Let me have a drink first,” I said.
By the time we got to Coney I was completely drunk and stoned, and everyone else was worse. Skinflick was talking about coke spoons. Who made them, and whether they came as part of a whole tiny cutlery set. The driver, Georgie—he was a guy I knew, with a ponytail and a full chauffeur’s outfit—parked in the same lot I’d parked in when I killed the Russians in 1993. After he let us out he got back in the car to wait.
I told Skinflick I didn’t want to go to Little Odessa.
“We’re not going to Little Odessa,” he said. He took Denise’s arm and led her out across the boardwalk, toward the ocean.
The Coney Island boardwalk has to be one of the widest in the world. When you’re as f*cked up as we were it seems endless. And that’s when you’re on top of it. Once we made it down the stairs to the beach, and the women got their high-heeled shoes off, Skinflick took a small Maglite out of his pants pocket and announced that we were going back the way we came, but underneath the boardwalk.
Like in the f*cking Motown song.
“No f*cking way,” Denise said. “I’ll cut my foot. I’m getting married tomorrow.”
“Don’t worry about it,” Skinflick said. “If he doesn’t take you I will.”
“I’ll step on a crack needle.”
“It’ll be worth it.”
“To you, maybe.”
“Just step where I’m stepping.”
Skinflick headed in without looking back, and Denise followed him. It was that or lose the benefit of the flashlight he was holding. Lisa went next, with me in the back.
It was creep-out city down there. Somehow the Motown song doesn’t mention the semivisible homeless people, or how they fast-shamble away from you like they’re scared of something only they know is down there.
Still, even in the darkness and the moving shadows, and even with all the columns, Skinflick got us to the other side pretty quickly. It was like he knew his way around. At the time I thought it was just that he was so depressed about Denise getting married that he didn’t give a f*ck what happened to him or any of the rest of us, but when we reached the end—a chain-link fence that had long strips of plastic woven through it vertically—he already knew where the loose corner was. While Denise and Lisa complained about how cold the sand was, Skinflick pushed the corner in and held it open. Denise went first, and suddenly we were all back under the glare of the New York night sky.
We were on asphalt, at the rear of some kind of complex that looked like a cross between a power plant and a high school. A jagged line of cylindrical cement buildings, two or three stories tall, connected to each other at ground level by aboveground tunnels. No windows, just pipes coming out through the walls. There was a hum, and a strange smell of rot.
Also, strangely, there was an amphitheater off in the distance. You could see its aluminum bleachers from below.
“What is this, a sewage plant?” I asked. I couldn’t even tell where we were in relation to the parking lot.
“Not even close,” Skinflick said. He walked straight for the largest building. Denise and Lisa were still pulling their shoes on, and they cursed as they hopped after him.
By the time we all caught up, Skinflick was at an entranceway that stuck out of the building. And he had a key.
When he opened the door there was a blast of warm air like an exhalation. It smelled like ocean. Like ocean concentrated.
In the beam of Skinflick’s flashlight, we could see a hallway that followed the curve of the exterior wall. The place looked like the inside of a submarine: metal pipes freshly painted blue and wet cement, with a lot of dials and a couple of tanks of some sort. “Shut the door behind you,” Skinflick said as he started through it. The sea smell was far more intense than it had been on the beach.
I said, “Skinflick, are we in the Aquarium?”
“Sort of,” Skinflick said. He waited for me to close the door.
“What do you mean, sort of?”
“It’s kind of a back door,” he said.
The hall ended, and a flight of yellow metal stairs took its place, continuing up along the inside of the wall until the darkness and the curvature of the building made it vanish.
“It smells disgusting in here,” Lisa said.
“I think it smells like p-ssy,” Denise said. She was into it now, joining Skinflick in his whacked-out mood. She took his hand and started pulling him up the stairs.
It didn’t smell like p-ssy. It smelled like the front of a cave that had a giant sleeping in it.
“I don’t think this is a good idea,” Lisa said.
Denise looked down at her and put a finger to her lips. “Shh. Pietro will take care of you.” To me she turned her fingers into a “V” and flicked her tongue out through them. Then she and Skinflick clanked up out of sight, though we could still see their flashlight moving up the curve of the wall.
“F*ck,” Lisa said.
“We can stay here if you want,” I said to her.
“Yeah, right.” She looked back along the hall, which was now consumed by darkness. She pushed her sweat-lank hair off her face. “Will you go first?” she said.
“Sure.” I started up the stairs.
It soon became completely dark, and as I slowed she came up close behind me and held on around my waist. She had very solid arms. Just as it started to turn me on, though, my foot clawed air, and I realized we were at the top.
“Denise!” Lisa hissed.
“Through here,” Denise said. Her voice was throaty, and echoey. Lisa and I followed it through a low arched hallway, trying not to bang our heads, and suddenly we could see again, even though Skinflick had his flashlight off. Because the room into which we emerged had skylights in the ceiling.
“Room” might be the wrong word, but whatever it was, it was huge and hexagonal, and the grated metal catwalk we were on ran all the way around it like a balcony, leaving an open space in the center that was maybe thirty feet across.
Five feet below the catwalk, not just in the center but also below the grate we were standing on, there was water. Water glinting from the skylights but otherwise pure black.
We were above a giant water tank.
The whole f*cking building was a water tank.
Skinflick and Denise were leaning over the railing, he behind her with his arms around her. “What do you think?” he said.
“What is this place?” I asked him. It sounded like a church.
“The shark tank.”
“The one with the chest from the Andrea Doria in it?”
“Yeah, but that’s been gone for years.”
I was amazed. I’d seen the shark tank from below, through the glass, a dozen times, though not since I was a child. But from that side the Aquarium had seemed like one large indoor space. And now I realized that that was an illusion, allowed by the tunnel-like hallways that ran between the freestanding tanks.
The largest of the tanks was the one we were now above. I remembered it as a vortex of giant, nightmare animals circling past the glass with dead eyes, not needing to visibly propel themselves. In the center of the tank, on the sand, had been the treasure chest from the Andrea Doria.
“What happened to the chest from the Andrea Doria?” I said.
“Some dipshit opened it live on national TV. Before you got cable.”
“No shit. What was in it?”
“What do you think was in it? They let it sit on the bottom of a shark tank the whole time we were kids. It was filled with mud.”
Lisa cleared her throat. “Are there sharks in there now?” she said.
“Lisa, it’s a shark tank,” Denise said.
Skinflick turned his Maglite back on and pointed it down at the surface. It mostly just reflected back up.
“Can we turn on the lights?” I said. There were heavy arc lamps clipped to support beams running just under the skylights.
Skinflick flicked the flashlight beam over them, then clicked it off. “I don’t think so. They’re on a timer.”
Lisa looked down at her feet. “Is this thing sturdy?” she said.
Skinflick jumped up and pounded his feet down on the grate, making it ring out and vibrate.
“Feels sturdy,” he said.
“Thank you, Adam,” Lisa said. “Now I’m going to vomit.”
“It gets better,” Skinflick said. He led the way around the ledge, past an open, freestanding metal closet that had bunched up wetsuits and a couple of scuba tanks in it. To a segment of grating that didn’t have a railing, just a yellow nylon rope. He unhooked one end of the rope.
“Adam, what are you doing?” Denise said.
I stepped back. It was instinctive—you couldn’t look at that section of ledge without thinking of falling in.
“I’m lowering the ramp,” Skinflick said.
The ramp was folded back up onto the grate. Skinflick lifted it and let it drop out over the water.
The booming clang as the ramp bounced into place—not horizontally but pointed down toward the water, at a forty-five-degree angle—lasted forever, and the vibrating deck felt like it was going to hurl us into the water.
“Look, there’s wetsuits,” Skinflick said. “Anyone want to go for a swim?”
No one said anything.
“No?” he said. “Well I’m going to put my foot in.” Then he actually started to step out onto the ramp.
“Adam, don’t!” Denise shouted.
“You’ve got to be kidding,” Lisa said.
I said, “Skinflick. Get the f*ck away from that thing.” I was gearing up to grab him, but even getting near the section without a railing was frightening.
Skinflick lowered himself to his ass and started crab-walking down toward the end of the ramp. “Somebody take my hand,” he said. “It’s too scary.”
“No way,” I said.
“I’ll do it,” Denise said. She went and lay down by the top of the ramp, and reached one hand down to Skinflick. Then she had to look away. He took hold of it and started to work his foot over the edge.
“Skinflick, don’t do it,” I said.
He grunted. There was a good ten inches of space between the end of the ramp and the surface of the water, so reaching it with his foot while retaining hold of Denise’s hand required him to fully stretch out.
He kicked the toe of one shoe in the water, then pulled his foot back onto the ramp. “See?” he said. “No big deal.”
Almost instantly there was an explosion in the water where his foot had been, then another one. In seconds the whole surface was roiling with enormous, slimy bodies. They looked like giant snakes sliding over each other in a bucket.
“Oh shit! Oh shit! Oh shit!” Skinflick said, scrambling back up the ramp and all the way to the wall, taking Denise with him into his arms.
Now, as the water bucked and dropped in waves, you could see sharks all over the place. One rolled and broke the surface with a fin, wet and shiny in the light from the ceiling panes.
Eventually the water settled, and they were hidden again.
Skinflick started to laugh. “Holy motherf*cking shit,” he said. “That is the scariest thing that has ever happened to me.”
Denise thumped him in the chest, and he grabbed her again and kissed her.
My own heart was pounding, and I realized Lisa and I had our arms around each other too.
Skinflick let his hands slide down Denise’s back. “Okay,” he said to me and Lisa. “Which side do you guys want?”
“Like, what, like we’re supposed to have sex now?” Lisa said.
“It’s a bachelorette party. So, yes.”
“Jesus f*cking Christ.”
“It’s not supposed to be romantic,” Skinflick said. “It’s supposed to be primal. Which it is. Right, Denise?”
“F*ck yeah,” she said.
“So which side do you want?” he said.
Lisa said, “Denise—”
Denise looked at her, and shouted, “Choose a f*cking side!”
So she did. The one with the wetsuits, and the cabinet.
Which you could sit in and hold each other, and eventually even f*ck in, without having to look down through the grate and see the water. Even if you could still smell it.
How young, or crazy, or callow do you have to be to have sex in a place that feels like you’re suspended over Satan’s eye?
I can’t defend it. All I can do is point out that twenty-four hours later I met Magdalena, and my life became a completely different thing.