A Change of Heart

Chapter Eighteen

MARIAN CLIMBED INTO BED BESIDE JAMES, BUT HE DIDN’T even look up.

“Leah is home. She said she had a wonderful time with Aaron. Gut news, no?”

James nodded. “Ya.”

Marian reached for her lotion on the bedside table and lit her own lantern on her side of the bed. “Leah’s clothes were damp and wrinkled, like maybe they’d been swimming, but I didn’t ask.”

Her husband still didn’t look up.

“James, you’ve been reading all afternoon. Are you still trying to learn from the Englisch author how to rear daughters?”

James had Leah’s note pages propped up against the book he’d been reading, so it was no wonder Marian thought he was reading the Englisch author. He veered the book in Marian’s direction so that she could see the stack of notebook paper resting against it. “No, I am reading Leah’s book.”

Marian’s eyes grew large. “Leah’s book?” She scooted closer to him and pushed back his arm so she could see better. “Where did you get that? Does she know you’re reading it?”

James pulled off his glasses and rubbed his eyes. “I don’t know. Ruth gave it to me.”

“Ruth? What was she doing with it?”

He raised his shoulders, dropped them slowly. “I reckon I don’t know. She said she thought I should read it, though.”

They sat quietly for a moment.

“Is it gut? The book,” Marian finally asked.

James swallowed back the lump in his throat. “Ya,” he whispered. Then he wrapped an arm around his wife, pulled her closer. “Listen to this.” James put his glasses on and read a page from Leah’s book.

Rose thought about her relationship with God, and she couldn’t imagine herself alone and without faith—like Lauren. She sat down beside her Englisch friend and prayed for guidance, for a way to open Lauren’s heart to the Lord and His Son, Jesus. As she silently prayed, she thought about her father and what he might do in a situation such as this. Rose’s father was the wisest man she knew, often strict with his daughters, but Rose had never doubted his love for her, or his faith in God. And he had a way of knowing what to do in a crisis.

Rose recalled the time when her father’s brother died, Rose’s only uncle. It was the only time she’d ever seen her father cry, and despite all of their grief, he’d reminded his daughters that God’s will often causes us pain that we cannot understand, but that to question His will is to question all things in life and our purpose on this earth. “We each have a purpose,” her father had said. “Mei brother’s purpose has been fulfilled.”

James took a deep breath, glanced at Marian.

“She’s talking about you.” Marian stroked his arm tenderly. “And David.”

James thought back to when his brother’s horse—an animal fresh off the track with no road experience—bolted out onto Lincoln Highway and into oncoming traffic. He nodded, then went on.

But this was a different kind of crisis. No one had died, yet a part of Lauren seemed to be dying on the inside. Her father was a loving man, but he thought Lauren should follow in his footsteps by running the family business. But Lauren had her own dreams, dreams her father couldn’t understand.

“My father says my dreams are nonsense, and that playing music will never make me a fine living, like taking over his business will,” Lauren said. “How can I make my father understand that he can’t make me into something I’m not?” She looked at Rose. “I want to make my father proud of me, but I also want to live my own life.”

James pulled off his glasses again and leaned his head against the headboard.

“James.” Marian leaned her head on his shoulder, then kissed his cheek. “She is also talking about you here.” Marian reached for the book on her husband’s lap. “Here, let me.”

James lifted his hand so Marian could take Leah’s loose pages. He closed the Englisch book and placed it on his bedside table. Marian straightened Leah’s pages, pulled her knees up, and propped their daughter’s words in front of her. James kept his head resting against the headboard as his wife read.

Rose smiled at her friend, then latched onto her hand. “Let me tell you about Jesus. He is a personal friend of mine, and I’d like to introduce you to Him.” Rose proceeded to tell Lauren about Jesus and His Father, and she prayed constantly that God’s words would flow from her and into her friend’s heart. When Lauren began to weep, Rose knew that the Holy Spirit was settling around her friend, and she thanked God continually. In the back of her mind, though, she kept wondering if her own father would be proud of her.

James felt a tear roll down his cheek.

His wife set Leah’s book aside and kissed away his tear. “My darling James.”

“I’ve been praying for the wrong things, Marian.” He took a deep breath and gathered himself, embarrassed for Marian to see him like this. He’d only cried once in his entire life—when David died— and yet his daughter’s words were having a profound effect on him. “I’ve prayed each night for God to rid Leah of these silly stories, not once considering that His will is being done.” He turned toward Marian. “Perhaps this story of hers will change a life somehow.”

Marian smiled. “Maybe it just did.”

When Aaron took Leah home, he kissed her yet again, and the feel of her lips against his stayed with him all the way home. What a wonderful day it had been. After their swim, they’d spent hours talking, and Aaron knew that someday he was going to make Leah his wife.

He wasn’t surprised to see the Petersheim spring buggy at his house when he pulled up. When he dropped Leah at home, she’d commented that Edna had probably taken the buggy and gone back to see Abner. The closer it got to the wedding, the more inseparable Abner and Edna were.

Aaron tended to his horse, then walked up to the house, a newfound bounce in his step. He smiled. He might have to eat a lot of chicken salad for the rest of his life, but he was willing to do that to be with Leah.

When he hit the porch, he heard voices. Edna and Abner were evidently in the den. Aaron heard his name and paused.

“Leah is only using Aaron. You do know that, right?” Edna’s voice coursed through him.

“What do you mean?” Abner asked.

Aaron inched closer to the door, careful to stay out of sight, then leaned his ear toward the door.

“Daed won’t let her go out and do anything because she shirks all her responsibilities at home. She’s late to meals all the time, and she just doesn’t do her share,” Edna said. “She helped a little bit when I got sick, but then she just slipped back to her old ways.”

“How is that using Aaron?”

“Daed wants so badly for Leah to find a husband, he’s not about to tell her she can’t go out with him. She only goes because it’s her ticket to freedom.”

Aaron’s chest tightened.

“She threw a fit that first night when I said Aaron was coming over. She’s never had an interest in him. I think it’s just wrong the way she is using him to get out of the house, because I think Aaron really likes her.”

“Ya, he does,” Abner said. “But are you sure about this?”

“Sure am.” Edna paused again. “Remember the other night when Aaron and your aunt picked up Leah to go to Paradiso?”

“Ya.”

“Well, she’d already sent word by way of the postman for her Englisch friends to meet her there. Daed didn’t want her spending time with them until she was doing her share around the house.”

Aaron’s stomach began to churn. How stupid I’ve been.

But then he thought about the afternoon they’d just shared, the kisses, the playfulness, the long talk. No. This couldn’t be true.

“I don’t want to see Aaron get hurt, that’s all,” Edna went on. “Leah has said over and over that she doesn’t want to get married. At least, not any time soon. And Aaron seems ready to settle down.”

Aaron had heard enough. He walked in the door, said hello, and marched up the stairs, but he did overhear Edna say one more thing before he hit the second floor.

“Uh-oh. Do you think he heard me?”

The next morning Leah beat everyone downstairs, started breakfast, and bounced around the kitchen, humming. And she had the strangest urge to attempt another tomato pie.

She busied herself all morning with the day’s chores. After she finished the laundry, she worked on other things to help her sisters. She even took another stab at hemming a pair of pants for her father. She’d stayed up working on her latest story, but something was different. Leah didn’t feel like she had to help out—she wanted to.

She wondered if this new attitude was what caused her tomato pie to turn out perfectly. She couldn’t wait to take it to Aaron. Maybe he would kiss her again. Her stomach somersaulted at the thought.

“Mamm, can I take the buggy to town?” It was nearing two o’clock, and Aaron had mentioned yesterday that he would be leaving work at two o’clock to go home and start readying the fields for the fall harvest. She wanted to catch him at the furniture shop and give him the pie.

Her mother folded two kitchen towels and placed them in a drawer before turning around to face Leah. “I reckon it will be all right with your daed.” Marian glanced at the pie. “Did you make this, Leah? Did it turn out this time?”

“I made it for Aaron, and it turned out perfectly,” she said proudly.

“Hmm. I thought you didn’t like to cook.”

Leah shrugged. “I’m not good at it, but something about Aaron makes me want to try harder.”

Her mother nodded. “Ah, I see.”

“I’m going to go ready the buggy.”