“You don’t.” His voice is deadly. He’s deadly. He kisses me again, biting my lip.
I hate that he’s using this to distract me. To revive me.
I’m so fucking cold.
“Come back, Margo,” he says against my lips. He presses kisses along the edge of my mouth, my jaw, my throat.
“Did you put my father in jail?”
I close my eyes, letting my head fall back.
His teeth nip my throat. His lips chase away the pain, back up, up, up. My jaw. The spot just below my ear. My earlobe. My temple.
How can he destroy me and make me feel better at the same time?
We’re fucked up.
I’m fucked up for enjoying this. For letting him melt me down to liquid again and again.
His lips touch my eyelid. His tongue flicks out and tastes my tears.
This is more than just… him trying to ease the pain. Him trying to erase what happened in our past.
My heart is splintering.
His lips find mine again, but everything is soft. His touch. His tongue, sweeping along the seam of my lips.
I exhale a long, shuddering breath.
When I open my eyes, he’s watching me. Maybe he’s trying to figure me out. If I’m stable, or if, once he releases me, I’ll run.
I would if my legs didn’t feel like jelly.
“How could you?” I whisper. “Was it your idea?”
He shakes his head. “We’re not doing this right now.”
I move back into my own seat, clicking my seat belt into place. My desire for answers chews at me, but he’s right. We can’t do this now. Not after that.
He starts the car. I close my eyes. Whether I actually fall asleep or just doze, I couldn’t say. But what feels like minutes later, he’s lifting me out of the car.
I keep my head tucked under his chin. Everything hurts.
“Is she okay?” Robert asks.
“She just fell asleep in the car,” Caleb answers. His voice is soft. “I didn’t want to wake her. I’ll just put her in bed…”
I snake my arms around his neck as he’s laying me down. He chuckles in my ear, his hands sliding along my forearms.
“I hate you,” I mumble, “but I still want you to stay.”
He exhales. “Your foster parents wouldn’t be happy with me.”
I adjust my grip, plastering him to me. It isn’t really fair for him—I have the leverage.
He lies next to me, petting my hair. “Okay, Margo.”
I sigh and inch closer. I still feel broken.
It’s unexpected. It’s sharp. If I move the wrong way, my heart may start bleeding. Best to stay completely still and hope that I heal overnight. That I can wish away all the bad pieces of Caleb—and me.
I fall asleep with his hand in my hair and my nose against his throat.
28
Amelie and Savannah have pulled a disappearing act.
It’s not surprising, Riley informs me. They like to take trips, and the school is resigned to accepting their halfhearted attendance. After all, their parents make considerable donations each year.
It’s because of the masquerade ball, they went to Paris to find dresses and masks.
Always a step above us little people, I suppose.
“Who are they going with?” I ask Riley.
She shrugs. “Last I heard, Amelie and Ian were going together. Not sure about Savannah.”
Ian Fletcher. He’s been keeping his distance, but I feel his stare like a hot coal against my skin. Why he’s taken such an interest is anyone’s guess.
“We need to pick out dresses,” she says.
We walk into the library. It’s remained our safe haven. So far, Caleb and Eli haven’t come searching for us. A few times Caleb has shot me questioning glances as I slipped into the class right after lunch. But he never asked, and I never mentioned it.
It’s been three days since Caleb and I went to New York City. He kept his distance on Sunday—letting me sort my emotions, I guess—and on Monday we were back to normal. As normal as we can be, anyway. And unsurprisingly, people have stopped making so many remarks. The picture drew attention at first, but they’ve all but forgotten it now.
“Lenora wants to go shopping this weekend,” I tell her. “Want to come?”
Riley grins at me. “Absolutely.”
The door to the library creaks open. We can’t see it from where we sit in the back, so both of us automatically slink down. Students aren’t supposed to be in here—let alone with food. It’s only because of Riley’s familial relationship with Amy that this is even possible.
A few times, we’ve had to hide in the stacks because the principal came in to speak with Amy. But those are rare days.
Caleb appears with Eli right behind him.
I groan. “There goes our safe haven,” I mumble to Riley.
Caleb looks down at me. “Are you hiding?”
“No.”
“We just like the quiet,” Riley says.
Eli grunts. “You’re another matter entirely.”
Yikes.
“Let’s go,” Caleb says.
I shake my head. “The last time we went with you, bad things happened.”
He raises his eyebrow. “And if you don’t come with me now, worse things will happen.”
I lean back and cross my arms. “No.”
He sighs, but I can tell he’s enjoying this. My stomach flips.
Caleb exchanges a glance with Eli, and then he’s leaning down, hauling me over his shoulder. I squeal as he rises. I’m upside down, my ass in the air.
“Oh my god.” Riley laughs.
“Are you going to come quietly?” Eli asks her.
“Yep,” she mutters, rising. She touches my arm. “Sorry!”
Caleb moves. I grunt, holding on to his shirt. His arms are banded around my thighs, keeping me in place. The four of us pass Amy’s office. She glances up, but quickly buries her head back in her book.
Traitor.
Caleb walks right into the cafeteria with me over his shoulder. My face gets hot, but I know begging won’t stop him. Things have to be done his way. Always.
Without Amelie and Savannah here, the cheerleader table is quiet. No one wants to step up and own the bullying or their hatred of me. Still, they all whisper when Caleb and I pass. Eli and Riley follow us, and the whispers double.
Caleb pats my ass, then lowers me back to my feet.
I glare up at his grinning face. “Not cool,” I mutter.