Theo comes into the store and flashes me the “you’re not trying hard enough” look I’ve been getting all week. He goes over to the woman and by the time he’s done schmoozing her, she comes to the register with a T-shirt that’s not green and a dress that’s not gold.
“Callie,” he says, when the customer is gone, “I know you’re new to all this, but you really need to work it a little more. Make the sales.”
“I’m sorry.” I’ve attempted to compliment the customers the way Kat does, but the words always trip over my tongue and taste insincere. And although I am Greek, what it means to be Greek is an alien concept, so I can’t use it to my advantage the way Theo and Alex do. “I’ll try harder.”
He sighs as if he doesn’t believe me. “Go ahead and take your lunch break now. I’ll cover you, and Kat should be here by the time you’re done.”
It feels as if I’m being punished.
My bench is empty, so I go there with my daily hummus and Coke. When Alex sees me, he says something to Jeff, hands him the keys to the truck, and they do one of those complicated guy handshakes. Jeff glances in my direction as he climbs into the cab and drives away. The whole exchange unsettles me somehow. Maybe because it feels as if I’ve answered some sort of silent booty call and now even Jeff knows what’s going to happen next. And maybe I’m embarrassed because I wouldn’t mind being something more than Alex’s booty call. Still, that doesn’t stop me from stepping aboard the boat and following Alex down into the cabin.
“Hi.” His arms come around me and he pulls me against him.
I thread my fingers through his curls as he lowers his face. His mouth is almost on mine when my own hoarse hello comes out. Just before he kisses me, he gives me that grin that makes my knees go rag-doll limp.
“I’ve been thinking about you all week.” Alex’s mouth is against my neck as his hand slides under my T-shirt. His skin tastes faintly of salt and sweat, and any hesitation I had about being nothing more than a booty call dissolves.
I’m pulling my shorts back on—and four minutes past the end of my break—when he asks me what time I get off work.
“Five.” I’m not worried about Theo, but I’m afraid that Kat has started her shift and she’ll be watching for me. That my T-shirt won’t hide the bite mark on my collarbone.
“Do you want to come over later?” His eyes follow my movements, as if I’ll disappear if he looks away. Ironic, considering he was the one who disappeared without a word. “I’ll get Chinese and maybe we could watch a movie or something.”
“I, um—” I pull my shirt over my head so I can escape his gaze for a second or two before I have to tell him the truth. I look at the floor when I say the words. “I kind of already have—plans.”
“Oh.” His eyebrows pull together, as if it hadn’t occurred to him that I’d be busy.
“You just left, so I thought”—the cabin grows smaller and I’m not sure how to end that sentence—“you could have called or something.”
“No, you’re right.” Alex looks away and I hate that. I could break my date with Connor. God, I want to break my date with Connor so much. But that wouldn’t be right. I don’t want to be that kind of girl. “I didn’t really think about it. So, it’s cool. Maybe another time.”
“Definitely. Absolutely. Yes.” Too many words are coming out of my mouth, but I hope that one of them might be the spark to reignite whatever it was I saw in his eyes before. I want him to suggest we do something tomorrow night instead, but he leaves me hanging.
“Okay, well, I have to go. I’m already late from break,” I say. “So, I guess I’ll see you later?”
“Sure.”
But as I let myself out of the cabin and walk to the store, I keep looking back. Not sure about anything at all.
Kat is helping customers when I come in. She smiles and waves at me in a way that makes me think she’s been too busy to worry about me. Which is good, because I’m too busy trying to figure out what just happened with Alex to make up an excuse.
“Oh my God, Callie, why didn’t you tell me Connor asked you out?” She comes over to me as I’m reorganizing the jewelry spinner. “I had to hear about it from Nick.”
“I guess I forgot.”
“How could you forget?” She bounces on the balls of her feet and her charm bracelet jingles. “This is so exciting! What are you going to wear?”
“Probably jeans and maybe a plaid shirt.”
“Good call.” Kat bobs her head as if my lack of planning is a plan. “Understated yet cute. Maybe with one of the lace-trimmed tank tops underneath and—ooh, that necklace with all the keys. And those brown leather sandals. You’ll look—um, you look as if you’re about to puke. What’s wrong?”
“I don’t know.” I hang and rehang the same necklace twice, just so I don’t have to look at her excited face. “I’m not sure about this.”
“Why? Connor is the nicest guy I know.”
“It’s just—I’m not feeling it.”
“I used to think Nick was completely annoying. But one day during our freshman year, he sweet-talked the lunch lady into giving him an extra peanut-butter cookie and then gave it to me. It was such a dumb little thing, but”—she shrugs—“that did it for me. Give Connor a chance. He might surprise you.”
I work my lower lip between my teeth. I wish I could be honest with her about Alex, but she wouldn’t understand, especially when she wants this thing with Connor to happen. It’s in her face, in her voice. And I don’t want to fight with her anymore. “Yeah, okay.”
Theo lets us leave work a little early, and as we walk to Kat’s car I can’t help but sneak a glance at the boat. Alex stands on deck, stringing sponges the way he did the first night I saw him, and I have to quell the urge to tell him I want to eat Chinese food and watch movies with him. Disappointment thumps with every heartbeat when he doesn’t even look up.
It feels like an event when the whole family walks Connor and me to the front door and waves from the porch as we get in the car. Everyone’s expectations seem to be riding on my shoulders, and I feel like I’m going to get this wrong.
“You, um—you look nice,” Connor says, pulling away from the curb. “I like your hair.”
Kat wove the front into two small French braids and ribboned them together in the back. It’s pretty.
“Thanks.” He’s wearing a distressed polo-style shirt and faded jeans, and his cologne is sporty and slightly strong, as if he just put it on. “So do you,” I say.
He fiddles with the radio as he drives, scanning up and down the frequencies until he finds the right song—something hard rock I don’t recognize—and glances at me to make sure his choice is okay. I smile, but I’ve got nothing to say. Playing checkers in Greg’s backyard was easy because we didn’t have to talk, but now … this is awful.
“I, um—” I turn down the volume on the radio. “I don’t really know how to say this, but—”
“You don’t really want to go out with me, do you?” His voice is quiet and I can hear the disappointment running through it.
I slide my finger along the frayed spot on my jeans. “How did you know?”
“I could kind of tell.” He brakes to a stop at a red light. “I mean, the first time I asked, you said you’d think about it. That should have been a bigger hint. I guess—I don’t understand why you said yes if you’re not interested.”
“Kat was so excited and I’ve never been on a real date before, and I thought you’d be …” I search for a flattering word. Comfortable. Nice. Those words suck. “… safe.”
Why didn’t I say “fun”? What guy wants to be told he’s safe? As proof, Connor’s nose crinkles as if I’ve used a profane word. Then he sighs and the sound punches me in the stomach. I would have avoided all of this if I had just said no.
“Not gonna lie.” He looks up through the windshield at the traffic light, as if he can’t wait for it to change so he can drive away from this moment. “I feel like an idiot because, well … for once it seemed as if I had a chance with a girl who is completely out of my league.”
“I’m not.”
Connor shrugs. The light changes and he makes a left.
“We can—”
“Yeah, I know. We can hang out.” He sounds tired and slightly sarcastic. I guess I can’t blame him for that. “Be friends.”