“Estrella, stop,” Melian said, coming up behind me. Her hands came down on the tops of my shoulders, tugging me away from the stone blocking me from getting to Caelum. “We have to go.”
“I won’t leave him!” I protested, tearing away from her as my breath huffed out of me. “You go if you’re so willing to leave him behind. I won’t.”
“Stubborn fool,” she said, shaking her head in disappointment. Beck pulled at her arm, taking her further down the tunnels and leaving me behind while I waited. If, somehow, Caelum made it through, I had to believe we could catch up with them, because I didn’t know another way to get back to the Resistance in the end, and we’d have nowhere else to go.
I couldn’t think of what I would do if he didn’t make it.
The sound of fighting came from the other side of the stone barrier, and the odds that were stacked against the two men seemed insurmountable while I waited. Still, the pained grunts and shouts of terror were all-consuming as I waited, thinking at any moment that stone would be shoved aside and the Mist Guard would come for me.
My arm throbbed in response to the threat, the wound caused by the iron knife that had caught me seeming to burn through flesh like acid. I wasn’t Fae. Just an echo of a Fae soul trapped in a human body through the mate bond that linked our souls. If iron hurt me this badly, I couldn’t imagine what it did to a Fae himself.
Malice flowed through the air, raising the hair on my arms. My hands trembled as one last shout rang through the night. “Estre—”
The start of my name echoed in the air, making my heart leap into my throat. It hadn’t been Caelum’s voice that called out to me.
But Jensen’s.
I swallowed, taking a step backward as someone hit the stone on the other side. It slid to the side suddenly, the shadow of a man stepping into the entrance of the tunnel as he pulled it closed behind him.
“Caelum?” I asked, the shadows hanging about his face concealing him from me. He stepped toward me, the shadows release him as he emerged into the light. Blood splattered his clothes and face, his eyes seeming lighter than normal as he raised his sword and dragged it through a scrap of fabric he clutched in his hand, cleaning the blood from the blade which he shoved back into his scabbard. “Where’s Jensen?” I asked, my bottom lip trembling as fear consumed me.
This wasn’t the man I’d fallen in love with. This was the man tainted by Faerie magic, who had destroyed a cave beast.
“Dead,” he said, tilting his head to the side. “Do you care, my star?”
I paused, trying to decide if I did in fact care. Not for Jensen as a person, but for another Marked life gone to waste. “Did you kill him?” I asked, regretting the words as soon as they left my mouth.
Caelum grinned, something malignant flashing over his face.
“No, but I didn’t save him either.”
35
We caught up to Melian and Beck at the end of the tunnel, finding them waiting in the tree line just beyond the secret entrance to the city. “Jensen?” she asked, but from the dejected look on her face, she already knew what had happened to the other man.
Though I suspected Caelum would be dead if she knew he’d allowed it willingly. My head swam with the implications that he might have allowed another man to die, simply because he’d crossed a boundary with me. Still, I couldn’t begin to confront my relief at having Caelum at my side, even if he was stained by the blood of those he’d killed. But the comprehension of what he’d done lingered just out of reach, as if I was in shock, waiting for reality to sink in and swallow me whole.
We walked for an hour after leaving the escape tunnel, going further into the woods and leaving the city behind us as we searched for a safe place to sleep. There were no caves to keep us warm here, only the barren fields and wooded lands of the Isle of Ruin to harbor us.
“We need to rest,” Melian said, kicking the snow away from a clear spot tucked beneath one of the larger trees. Beck sat against the trunk, leaving Melian to lower herself to the ground between his spread legs and lean her back into his chest. I went silent for a moment as I curiously watched the practiced, intimate moment between the two of them.
“We should go back,” Beck said, disrupting the silence as Caelum cleared another spot of snow and sat down the same way Beck had. He grabbed me around the waist, pulling me down so that I nestled into the cradle of his embrace. The warmth of his body sank into me, heating the parts of me that I wasn’t certain would ever get warm again.
I wished I’d let him convince me to go back to the caverns, to turn a blind eye to those hiding in Calfalls and suffering.
“We’ve made it this far. We have to get to the people in Calfalls,” Melian said, glancing in the opposite direction of home. “Perhaps Beck should return the long way around the city and warn the others to go on guard, so no one leaves the tunnels except for an emergency. If the Fae have already infiltrated the cities this far North, nowhere is safe.”
“I won’t leave you out here unguarded,” Beck said, curling his arm tighter around her waist. There was something between them that went beyond a casual liaison, but I’d also seen hints of a similar relationship between Melian and Duncan.
Everything was different in the Resistance.
Melian sighed but nodded, accepting that he wouldn’t willingly leave her side; not when the Fae were everywhere.
“Have you ever seen the Ruined City, Estrella?” Melian asked.
“No” Shaking my head, I felt certain she already knew the answer. I didn’t think there were many people alive who’d seen Calfalls for themselves. It wasn’t often that people went to the city that was abandoned and destroyed.
“All of us should see it once in our lifetime. We should bear witness to the destruction the Fae wrought during the last war, so that we can truly understand what is at stake now. You both need to understand that there are greater concerns than whatever it is that’s between you,” she said, turning to Beck and nodding at him in confirmation.
“Why are they in the Ruined City?” I asked. The place that was devoid of all life seemed like an odd choice for a colony of living, breathing people.
“Nobody thinks to look there,” she said, dropping her head. “But if the Fae are willing to infiltrate cities filled with the Mist Guard, nowhere is safe.”
I rested my head on Caelum’s shoulder as dread crept through me. We’d reached another catalyst, our safety torn from our grasp. There was only so much instability I could stomach. Only so much I could tolerate as my eyes drifted closed.
I breathed in Caelum’s scent of winter, the hum of his Fae Mark floating between us on a breath of wintergreen. The knowledge that he belonged to another—he’d never truly be mine if the Fae came for us—writhed between us as I clung to him more tightly while the others fell asleep.