Anyway, that’s all a long way of saying that, sifting through it all with hindsight, there was one thing, looking back, that I always felt sure about, and it was that buzzer going off in the night. It started after Zoe got with Andrew, although thinking about it, it never happened while he was around.
It was the last Sunday of October. I remember because I had to be up early on Monday morning, on Halloween, and it had gotten to the point where I was too annoyed to answer. The buzzer went, I got out of bed, opened the front door, went straight to the lift and pressed for ground. This is gone midnight and for once all the halls, the lift, everything, was deserted. I was shaking, wondering what the doors would open on to when I hit the ground floor, but it was just the empty lobby. The lights had gone out, which they always did, but there were lampposts outside, so I could see the shine across the battered plastic floor. I walked to the entrance and opened it and saw someone, just this shadow man, walking away. I shouted after him and he stopped and turned and looked at me. All I could see was the shape of him, but I knew he was looking right at me. It had been raining, and I had bare feet, so I didn’t go outside. After a few seconds, he just backed off into the dark and disappeared.
I’ve always been convinced that if I’d taken four or five steps into the light, I would have seen him, this man who went on to take Zoe. And I’ve always been convinced that I annoyed him, like, I pissed him off by going down there that night, because after that, all hell broke loose.
From: [email protected]
Sent: 2019-01-23 10:19
To: you
on Tue, Jan 22, 2019, Joseph Knox [email protected] wrote:
Hey, yes, I am still reading, but it’s definitely not me calling you at three in the morning (no matter how many stiff ones I might have had). Not enough hours in the day rn sorry.
And I think a lot of people feel that way about writing their second book. After the first, your talent’s just a rumor, then with the second you’ve got to find a way to try and prove it. From what I’ve read so far, you ARE proving it so keep going.
I’ve been through the stuff referring to the tower and the weird kind of presence in those rooms. I find it interesting that both Lois AND Harry mention their keys being stolen early on. Just read the Shadow Man chapter, which is v unsettling. Do you know who it was? Does she??
Maybe we should both unplug our phones tonight?
Jx
# # #
Hey—well thanks for that, Knoxy—sometimes I think the rumors of my talent have been greatly exaggerated.
Re: Shadow Man, no I don’t know who it was, Kim says she doesn’t know either, but just wait until you see what the mad fucker did next.
Ex
7.
“High Notes”
The below is an uncompleted, tampered-with assignment found on Zoe Nolan’s laptop on October 31, 2011:
I have always been fascinated by popular music and its culture from a young age. Although I would like to think my interest is natural I have also been encouraged by my family who are also musical. I have mostly been encouraged by my father, who was a professional musician himself for many years. I learned basic piano from him at a young age and was specially inclined to singing. I began to play the piano and sing at family gatherings, where I learned that I also enjoyed performance. This is because I believe that music is a “language” that exists to make people feel, and I enjoy watching these feelings take place as I perform.
Although I studied music at college and passed with a B+, I am less interested in theory than I am in practical music. I sing at a Grade 8 level and am now improving my piano skills, which are currently at a Grade 5 level. However, my main focus remains on performance. I have performed as part of choirs, ensembles, and rock groups. I have accepted many offers of paid singing work in and around my local area. I feel that this has given me good insight into life as a musician and
And…?
And what, Zoe? You never quite finished your thought.
There are too many pronouns here, sweetheart—I this, I that, I the other—although I can understand the urge. You’re Zoe Nolan, after all. I wonder if you realize quite how lucky that makes you? To look the way that you look and contain the gifts you contain. I’m inside your room as I write this, but I’d like to be so much closer to you than that, because I can never—I can never—get close enough. If I could, I’d be inside your brain, and I’d be inside your body. I want to see you throw that head back with your mouth wide open, I want to hear you really hit those high notes. Because if it were up to me, sweetheart, I’d be wearing you. I’d peel you from top to bottom with my shiny then stitch myself into your skin. I’d go out into the world with your face on over mine. I want to see out of your skull. There’s more but I think you might be coming. Well, you and me both, darling ;) xx
KIMBERLY NOLAN:
Liu Wai was suddenly sitting next to me in my room, eyes down, doing this stage whisper like she was taking my confession or something. “Listen, I know how hard it can be to live in someone else’s shadow, but you’ve scared your sister. I thought I’d give you the chance to explain.” I just got up and walked out, went in to Zoe and asked what was wrong.
She showed me her laptop.
She’d left it open in her room while she’d been out, halfway through some personal statement, then come back to find this psychotic breakdown in its place. I was reading it, rereading it, when the intercom started buzzing and we both jumped. We went to it and asked who was there but got no answer. I double locked the door. After that, we always did.
LIU WAI:
Reading the essay, I’d just naturally assumed it had to have been written by Kim? She seemed the obvious person to me, because she so clearly felt that way about Zoe. Like, there weren’t that many suspects. Our flat was only me, Kim, Zoe and Alex. Obviously, I hadn’t written it. I’d been with Zoe for most of that day—we’d met after my last class and gone shopping for Halloween costumes in town—then when we got back I’d perched on her desk, still talking, and noticed how hot her laptop was, as if it had been on all day. She opened it to look and kind of went pale. So clearly she hadn’t written it either. I mean, she’d hardly stalk herself. That left Alex, who’d been out with one of her boyfriends for most of the day, or Kim. And by the way, it’s no coincidence that this happened on the thirty-first, a Monday that year. Mondays were the only days when the flat was dependably empty. Everyone had classes. I thought, who else but one of us would know that? My suspicions were only raised more when I started calling the police and Kim ripped my phone out of my hand.
KIMBERLY NOLAN:
I was stressing the point that maybe we should talk to Zoe first, maybe we should see what she wanted to do. Maybe, since Liu had made her into a laughingstock the last time something like this happened, she should get some say in how we handled it.