Thickly built but shapely and blessed by a beautiful, clear-skinned face, she knew her flaming waist-length hair was an eye-catcher and used it like a prop, tossing and arranging and rearranging as she sashayed toward us in impossible heels. Her glossy satin dress shifted between gray and mocha depending on the light.
The garment looked tight enough to restrict respiration. One of those sadistic things brides pick for their supposed friends in order to look good in comparison. But Leanza seemed to enjoy working it, walking in a way that maximized gelatinous bounce. Her smile nearly bisected her face, her teeth whiter than fresh snow.
Milo led her to the area vacated by Sean’s group.
She sat carefully, tugged her bodice down to expose an additional inch of bosoms.
“At your service, Lieutenant.” A look at me. “Yours, too, sir.” Tinkly, little-girl voice. Huge blue eyes awned by false lashes that could’ve been fashioned from tarantula legs.
Milo said, “Sorry for the wait, Ms. Cardell. Terrible thing you’ve been through.”
“Call me Lee, Lieutenant. Yeah, it freaked me out, I mean all I wanted was a place to…you know.” Spidery flutter. “The little girls’ room. But I’m fine now, had a Martini—that’s okay, right? I mean I don’t have to be totally sober to talk to you, do I?”
“What you endured, Lee, I can see booze helping.”
Leanza Cardell laughed. “You sound kinda like a TV detective.” Edging satin knees closer to Milo.
He said, “Columbo?”
“Who’s that?”
“Historical figure.”
“Huh?”
“Please run it by us again, Lee.”
* * *
—
With her hair and chest as props, Leanza retold her narrative, creating a mini-drama in which her bladder starred.
“I mean, really, you go in to tinkle—that’s what my grandma calls it, to tinkle—you go in to tinkle, are trying to pull down your panties, and you see that? I thought I’d lose it completely. So who is she?”
“That’s what we’re trying to find out, Lee.”
“She was dressed to party, had to be on the invite list.”
“She isn’t and no one seems to know her.”
“Really? I assumed she was from his side. I mean I knew she wasn’t from Brears’s side, I know everyone Brears knows.”
“You and Brears go back?”
“High school, we were both cheerleaders.”
“So your first impression was she was Gar’s friend.”
“Well,” she said, “I just assumed. She’s not? Wow, that’s weird. You’re sure she’s not?”
I said, “No one from his side admits knowing her.”
“Admits? You think they’re lying?”
“Any reason they would be?”
“I’m not saying that—can I ask your name? So we can talk like people. You, too.”
“Milo.”
“Alex.”
“Nice names for nice guys,” she said, smiling crookedly. “All I mean, Alex, is that if she’s not from Brears’s side, she’d have to be from Gar’s side, right? It’s like, that’s the whole thing, right? So if they don’t admit—I mean it’s the process of elimination, right? She has to come from somewhere.”
I nodded. “You were just sitting with Gar’s family. Did anyone indicate they knew her?”
“Uh-uh. They weren’t talking much. Pretending like it didn’t happen, you know? Gar’s dad did go on a bit about how much it cost and now look what happened, and Gar’s sister—the married one—was saying she was pissed she couldn’t bring her kids but now turned out that was a blessing.”
We waited.
Leanza Cardell said, “That’s it, really.”
I said, “Did Amanda have anything to say?”
“Her? The freak? She reads,” said Leanza Cardell. “Brears warned me about her.”
“Warned you about what?”
“Her being a psycho freak. Autistic like, what do they call it, spectral? You just met her, she’s weird, right? Brears didn’t want to invite her to the bachelorette in Vegas but she had to. Thank God she didn’t come. Said she had a test. Wasn’t nice about it.”
“Rude.”
“Not answering the e-vite, not answering Brears’s calls. Finally, the day of she emails, like, ‘got a test.’ Every time I’ve seen her, she’s reading. I mean come on.”
I said, “Speaking of the bachelorette, anything interesting happen?”
She flushed scarlet. “No, it was great.” Loss of volume on the last two words. Her eyes slid to the right and back.
Milo said, “Lee, if there’s something that could relate to this murder, we need to know.”
Fingers knotted around flame-colored hair. Pale knuckles.
“Lee?”
“No, no, nothing like that, it was—the usual.”
I smiled. “Never been to a bachelorette so don’t know what the usual is.”
She squirmed. Satin squeaked. “You know. We ate and drank and had…you know, male dancers.”
“Any conflict—fights among the girls?”
“No, we were—it was all about the party.”
White knuckles as her lips moved. Again, she glanced to the side.
I said, “Did Brears do anything that might’ve gotten her into trouble with someone?”
Leanza Cardell’s head dipped toward her satin lap. “I really don’t want to talk about this. It’s not fair.”
“To who?”
“Brears. She’s entitled to her…time on the runway.”
“Stardom.”
“Yeah, it was supposed to be her big day.”
I said, “So what, the party was an intro to the big day?”
“Well…” Grimace. “I don’t want to talk about it.”
Milo said, “Someone was murdered, Lee. If you know anything—”
“I don’t. It had nothing to do with it.”
“What’s it, Lee?”
“Nothing.”
“What happened?”
“Nothing,” she repeated. “Dancers are nothing to anyone, they’re like…they’re…no one even knew anyone’s name, okay? It’s not like the two of them had an affair, just a quickie—”
She clamped her hand over her lips. “Omigod I’m such a…” Wet eyes.
Milo said, “There was some fooling around. A dancer and Brears.”
“You never heard that from me. It’s not important!” She began crying.
I said, “We’re not here to judge.” One of the baldest lies I’ve ever told.
“I’ve messed up everything!”
“You haven’t, Lee. Really.” I placed a hand on hers. Warm, slightly moist flesh. A body maintained on simmer.
She looked at me. “Really? You’ll forget about it?”
“If there really was nothing more than some fooling around.”
“There really wasn’t, sir—Alex. I swear to you. We don’t even know their names, everyone wears masks, no one knows anybody or anything.” She looked around, panicked. Lowered her head again and said something inaudible.
“What’s that, Lee?”
“Ma fau.”
“Your fault?”
Mournful nod.
“For…”
“Not stopping it. He asked me first, picked me out and said I was hot, it would be fun. I said no way.”
“You opted out. Nothing wrong with that, Lee.”
“That’s what I thought!” Squeezing my fingers.
I said, “Brears thought differently.”
“It was supposed…I thought…I figured it would just be—” She stroked air. Placed a hand behind her head and pushed down. “I should’ve done it to save her. I just wanted to stay classy!”
I said, “You took care of yourself, Lee. Nothing to be ashamed of, just the opposite.”
“But I should’ve protected her. She already had drank way way too much, she had these cocktails…I should’ve, I mean I tried, told her don’t do it but she laughed and then she’s getting up pulling her dress down so her you-knows are all exposed and then he’s taking her hand…” More tears. “They actually did it. I couldn’t believe it, they did it. And everyone’s cheering.”
“Then it was over,” I said.
“Don’t judge her. Please. That’s how she is.”
“Determined.”
She sniffed. “Yeah. She always gets her way. Always.”
* * *
—
Milo produced a tissue and Leanza dabbed her eyes. We questioned her gently, going over the same ground, probing for new info. She said, “Uh-uh, I swear that’s everything. And no way the party is important.”
I said, “How many girls were there?”
“Why? You’re not going to talk to them—please, I don’t want them to know I told!”
Milo looked at me. If we needed to find out, we could.
He said, “Sure. Big party?”