By the time he was brushing his lips to hers the kiss felt inevitable. Avery kissed him back without thinking, eager to see what Watt felt like, tasted like. The kiss was soft and slow and she loved how warm his hands were on her hips.
When they finally broke apart, neither of them spoke. Avery felt a strange, aching happiness. She’d finally done it: kissed someone who wasn’t Atlas. For real this time, not someone she was halfheartedly avoiding, not a sloppy makeout at a holiday party, but someone she might actually like. It felt like sacrilege, and yet it hadn’t been that hard at all.
Maybe this was what she needed, she thought, to help her get over Atlas once and for all. Maybe Watt was what she needed.
“Good night, Avery,” he said, turning back toward the hover. The feelings swirling uncertainly around Avery’s mind coalesced into a single word.
“Wait.”
Watt stopped, the door halfway shut.
Avery’s heart was beating too fast, her breathing uneven. She wondered if Atlas was home and would see them together. Stop thinking of Atlas. She didn’t want Watt to leave, and yet she wasn’t sure she was ready for this. But maybe she never would be.
“I was thinking …” She bit her lip. Watt stood there patiently, watching her watch him. And Avery realized her decision was made.
“Do you want to come in?”
WATT
AT FIRST WATT wasn’t sure he’d heard correctly. “Yeah. I mean, I’d love to,” he told Avery, trying not to sound too eager.
He let the hover drive off as she took his hand and led him inside, through the imposing mirrored entryway that opened onto their vast, two-storied living room. He half expected to go toward the couch, but instead Avery turned immediately to the right, down a carpeted hallway. Were they really going where he thought they were going? he wondered. He wasn’t used to doing this stuff without Nadia’s help.
“This is my room,” Avery murmured, pushing open a door.
Watt was dimly aware of an ornate bedroom with a massive four-poster bed, everything decorated in soft blue and cream, antique prints and heavy-framed mirrors spaced evenly on the walls. But he couldn’t focus on anything but Avery. He hesitated, his mind whirling, wondering if he should make the first move or if that would be too forward.
And then Avery leaned in and kissed him, and he was done thinking.
They fell backward onto the bed in a wild tangle. Watt wasn’t being careful with his kisses anymore. Avery began impatiently unbuttoning his dress shirt, yanking the straps of his suspenders down over his shoulders, and then her hands were on the plane of his chest and she was pushing him back against her pillows, her kisses insistent, almost frantic. In whatever part of his mind was still functioning, Watt wanted to shout some primal victory cry.
He couldn’t quite believe it. He was in Avery Fuller’s bedroom, on Avery Fuller’s bed, kissing Avery Fuller. The most beautiful, most incredible, most intriguing girl in the entire world. And of all the infinite guys she could have, she had somehow picked him.
He slipped his hands around to the zipper at the back of her dress. Avery made a sound deep in her throat. Mistaking her meaning, Watt tugged it down all the way, and Avery pulled back as if scalded.
He blinked, dazed. “I’m sorry. We can slow down,” he said thickly.
“No. It’s not—I just—” Avery took a deep, rattling breath. “I can’t do this.” She sounded close to tears.
Watt sat up and raked a hand through his hair. “I promise. Nothing you don’t want to do.” He searched for his shirt and threw it back on, feeling guilty.
“It’s not that …” She trailed off, biting her lip. “I think you should go,” she said, and there was a finality in her voice that scared Watt more than anything she’d said.
“Okay. But … why?” he couldn’t help asking.
Avery didn’t say anything, didn’t even look at him. He was reminded suddenly of Eris’s birthday party, how they’d been talking, even flirting; then in a bewildering instant Avery had gone pale and dumped him on Ming. And what about that weird, wistful comment she made tonight, about not always getting everything she wanted? Even without Nadia, Watt’s mind was capable of putting together the pieces.
“Is it someone else?” He knew it was an asshole thing to ask, but he wanted to know. Avery just looked at him in apparent distress. “Never mind. Forget it,” Watt said, hating how bitter he sounded.
Without another word, he turned and walked out of Avery’s room, out of her apartment, and maybe out of her life for good.
LEDA
LEDA SLID INTO the hover alongside Atlas. It was later than she’d realized, and she’d drunk more than she’d meant to. All the uncertainty in her life was throwing her off. But it didn’t matter; she and Atlas were here, together, alone at last. She scooted closer to him, too drunk to worry anymore, and looked up at him through her lashes.
She was sick of waiting. She wanted him so acutely she couldn’t think straight. The hover reached her house, and Leda started to kiss him.
“Leda.” Atlas pulled back, circling her wrists with his hands and lowering them to her lap.
“You should come inside,” she persisted.
Atlas shook his head. “We need to talk.”
Those four words sent a cold finger of dread down her nerves, already buzzing and on edge with the alcohol. “So talk,” she said bluntly.
“I had a lot of fun with you at the gala,” Atlas began awkwardly. “You looked beautiful tonight, you know. But,” he went on, and in that but she saw all her heartbreak, “I don’t think we should go out again.”
“You don’t want to at least sleep with me before you run off this time?”
Atlas flinched. “I’m sorry. What happened in Catyan … I should have stopped it before it went so far.”
“If it was such a mistake, then why did you ask me out again tonight?”
“Because you’re incredible. Any guy would be lucky to go out with you.” Atlas looked straight into her eyes. “You deserve better than me—you deserve the truth. And the truth is, I have feelings for someone else. It wouldn’t be fair to you, letting things go on when I feel this way.”
“All right, then.”
Atlas started to come around to open the door for her, but she stepped out and slammed it shut before he had the chance. “I’m sorry, Leda. I hope we can stay friends,” he said.
She just carefully climbed up her steps, letting him see how unaffected she was, stubbornness and wounded pride keeping her head aloft. She wondered what he would say, if he knew that the last time he’d pulled something like this, she’d gone on a wild tailspinning bender that ended in two months of rehab.
She should have known better. She should have known that Atlas would play boomerang with her emotions again, ask her out to big public events and then tell her stiffly that he wanted to be “fair.” I’ll show you fair, she thought, walking in her front door without turning her head even a fraction of a degree back in his direction.
But the moment she was safely in her room, Leda crumpled to the floor, cradling her head in her hands. A terrifying part of her hated Atlas for the way he’d treated her. She wanted to hurt him, him and whatever stupid girl he supposedly had feelings for.
Leda realized with a start that she still hadn’t used the best weapon in her arsenal. She started mumbling, composing a message to Nadia. You were wrong. Atlas just told me that he’s in love with someone else. Figure out who it is, or you’re fired.
A moment later, a response she didn’t expect flashed across her vision. Too late. I quit.
Her blood boiled. No one quits on me. You can’t quit, not now.
And you wanted to fire me. It sure is hard to keep up with your mood swings.
You little—