JUN DO dreamed of sharks biting him, of the actress Sun Moon blinking and squinting, the way Rumina had when the sand was in her eyes. He dreamed of the Second Mate drifting farther and farther into that harsh light. A stab of pain would arrive, and was he awake or asleep? His eyes roamed the insides of lids swollen shut. The endless smell of fish. Shock-work whistles signaled dawn, and he knew night had arrived when the hum of a little fridge went off with the power.
All his joints felt locked up, and taking too deep a breath was like opening the furnace slats of pain. When his good arm could finally reach over to inspect the bad arm, he could feel fat horsefly hairs, the coarse thread of surgical stitching. He had a half memory of the Captain helping him up the stairs of the community housing block where the Second Mate lived with his wife.
The loudspeaker—Citizens!—took care of him during the day. Afternoons, she came from the cannery, the faint scent of machine oil still on her hands. The little teapot would rattle and whistle and she would hum along with The March of Kim Jong Il, which signaled the end of the news. Then her hands, ice cold with alcohol, would disinfect his wounds. Those hands rolled him left and right to change the sheets and empty his bladder, and he was sure he could feel in her fingers the trace of her wedding ring.
Soon, the swelling had gone down, and now it was gunk sealing his eyes shut, rather than inflammation. She was there with a hot cloth to steam them open. “There he is,” she said when his vision was finally back. “The man who loves Sun Moon.”
Jun Do lifted his head. He was on a pallet on the floor, naked under a light yellow sheet. He recognized the louvered windows of the housing block. The room was strung with little perch, drying on wires like laundry.
She said, “My father believed that if his daughter married a fisherman, she’d never starve.”
And into focus came the Second Mate’s wife.
“What floor are we on?” he asked.
“The tenth.”
“How’d you get me up here?”
“It wasn’t so bad. The way my husband described you, I thought you’d be a lot bigger.” She ran the hot cloth over his chest, and he tried not to wince. “Your poor actress, her face is black and blue. It makes her look old, like her time has passed. Have you seen her movies?”
Shaking his head no made his neck hurt.
“Me either,” she said. “Not in this dumpy town. The only movie I ever saw was a foreign film, a love story.” She immersed the cloth in hot water again, then soaked the ridges of all his scars. “It was about a ship that hits an iceberg and everybody dies.”
She climbed onto the pallet next to him. With both arms, she muscled him over and onto his side. She held a jar to him and maneuvered it until his umkyoung was inside. “Come on,” she said, then gave him a couple claps on the back to get him going. His body pulsed in pain, and then the stream began. When he was done, she lifted the jar to the light. The fluid was cloudy and rust-colored. “Getting better,” she announced. “Soon you’ll be walking down the hall to the tenth-floor toilet like a big boy.”
Jun Do tried to roll onto his back by himself, but he couldn’t, so he just lay there, curled on his side. On the wall, beneath the portraits of the Dear and Great Leaders, was a little shelf with the Second Mate’s “America” shoes on them. Jun Do tried to figure out how the Second Mate had gotten them home, when the whole crew had seen them go into the water. Tacked large on the wall was the main chart from the Junma. It showed the entire Korean Sea, and it was the chart by which all the other charts onboard were referenced. They’d thought it burned with the others in the fire. On it were pushpins marking every fishing ground they’d visited, and in pencil were traced the coordinates of several northerly positions.
“Is that the course of the rowers?” Jun Do asked her.
“The rowers?” she asked. “This is a map of all the places he’d been. The red pins are cities he’d heard about. He was always talking about the places he’d take me.”
She looked into Jun Do’s eyes.
“What?” he asked.
“Did he really do it? Did he really pull a knife on American commandos, or is that some bullshit story you guys cooked up?”
“Why would you listen to me?”
“Because you’re an intelligence officer,” she said. “Because you don’t give a shit about anybody around this backwater. When your mission’s done, you’ll go back to Pyongyang and never think about fishermen again.”
“And what’s my mission?”
“There’s going to be a war at the bottom of the ocean,” she said. “Maybe my husband shouldn’t have told me, but he did.”
“Don’t fool yourself,” he said. “I’m just a radio guy. And yes, your husband took on the U.S. Navy with a knife.”
She shook her head with muted admiration.
“He had so many crazy plans,” she said. “Hearing that makes me think if he’d have lived, he might have really gone through with one.”
She ladled sweetened rice water into Jun Do’s mouth, then rolled him back, covering him with a sheet again. The room was getting dark, and soon the power would fail.
“Look, I’ve got to go out,” she said. “If you have an emergency, give a yell, and the floor official will come. She’s at the door if someone so much as farts in here.”
She took a sponge bath by the door, where he couldn’t see her. He could only hear the faint sound of the cloth on her skin and the sound of water as it dripped from her body to the pan she crouched in. He wondered if it was the same cloth she’d used on him.
Before she left, she stood over him in a dress that bore the wrinkles of having been hand-wrung and hung to dry. Though he beheld her through the oceany vision of newly opened eyes, it was clear she was a true beauty—tall and square-shouldered, yet cloaked in a soft layer of baby fat. Her eyes were large and unpredictable and black bobbed hair framed a round face. She had an English dictionary in her hand. “I’ve seen some people get hurt at the cannery,” she said. “You’re going to be all right.” Then, in English, she added, “Sweet dreams.”
In the morning, he woke with a start—a dream ending with a flash of pain. The sheet smelled of cigarettes and sweat, and he knew that she’d slept next to him. Beside the pallet was a jar filled with urine that looked tinctured with iodine. At least it was clear. He reached to touch the jar—it was cold. When he managed to sit up, there was no sign of her.
The light was amplified by the sea, filling the room. He pulled off his sheet. Bright bruising fanned his chest, and there were pressure cuts on the ribs. His stitches were crusty, and after smelling them, he knew they’d have to be expressed. The loudspeaker greeted him—“Citizens, today it is announced that a delegation is to visit America to confront some of the problems facing our two fearsome nations.” Then the broadcast went on in the usual formula: evidence of the worldwide admiration for North Korea, an example of Kim Jong Il’s divine wisdom, a new method to help citizens avoid starvation, and, finally, warnings to civilians from various ministries.
A draft through the window set the dried fish swaying on their lines, the cartilage of their fins the color of lantern paper. From the roof came a series of yips and howls, and the constant clicking of nails on cement. For the first time in days, he felt a pang of hunger.
Then the door opened and, breathing hard, the Second Mate’s wife came in.
She was carrying a suitcase and two five-liter jugs of water. She was sweating, but there was a weird smile on her face.
“What do you think of my new suitcase?” she asked. “I had to barter for it.”
“What did you barter?”
“Don’t be an ass,” she said. “Can you believe I didn’t own a suitcase?”
“I guess you never went anywhere.”
“I guess I never went anywhere,” she said to herself.
She ladled some rice water into a plastic cup for him.
He took a drink and asked her, “Are there dogs on the roof?”
“That’s life on the top floor,” she said. “Broken elevator, leaky roof, toilet vents. I don’t even notice the dogs anymore. The housing council’s breeding them. You should hear them on Sundays.”
“What are they breeding them for? Wait—what happens on Sundays?”
“The guys at the karaoke bar say that dogs are illegal in Pyongyang.”
“That’s what they say.”
“Civilization,” she said.
“Aren’t they going to start missing you at the cannery?”
She didn’t answer. Instead, she knelt down and began rifling the pockets of the suitcase, looking for any evidence of its previous owner.
Jun Do said, “They’re going to give you a criticism session.”
“I’m not going back to the cannery,” she said.
“Not ever?”
“No,” she said. “I’m going to Pyongyang.”
“You’re going to Pyongyang.”
“That’s right,” she said. In a fold of the suitcase’s lining, she found some expired travel passes, stamped by every checkpoint between Kaesong and Chongjin. “Typically it takes a couple weeks, but I don’t know, I got a feeling it could happen any day.”
“What could happen?”
“Them finding my replacement husband.”
“And you think he’s in Pyongyang?”
“I’m a hero’s wife,” she said.
“A hero’s widow, you mean.”
“Don’t say that word,” she said. “I hate the sound of it.”
Jun Do finished his rice water, and slowly, slowly lay back down.
“Look,” she said, “it’s horrible what happened to my husband. I can’t even think about it. Seriously, whenever my mind goes there, something inside me just turns away. But we were only married a few months, and he was on a boat with you almost the whole time.”
It had taken a lot out of him to sit up, and when his head touched the pallet, the comfort of yielding to exhaustion overtook the discomfort of recovery. Almost everything on him hurt, yet a feeling of well-being came over his body, as if he’d been working hard all day with his mates. He closed his eyes and felt the hum of it. When he opened them again, it was afternoon. Jun Do had a feeling that what had awakened him was the sound of her closing the door as she left. He rolled some, so he could see the corner of the room. There was the pan that she used to wash herself. He wished he could reach it, to check if the water was still warm.
Come twilight, the Captain stopped by. He lit a couple of candles and sat in a chair. Looking up at him, Jun Do could see he’d brought a bag. “Look here, son,” the Captain said, and from the bag produced a slab of tuna and two Ryoksong beers. “It’s time to get your health back.”
The Captain opened the bottles and sectioned the tuna raw with his bosun’s knife. “To heroes,” the Captain said, and, halfheartedly, they both drank. The tuna, though, was exactly what Jun Do needed. The fat of the sea, he savored it against the roof of his mouth.
“The catch was good?” Jun Do asked.
“The waters were lively,” the Captain said. “It wasn’t the same without you or the Second Mate, of course. We got a couple hands to help out from the Kwan Li. You heard their captain ended up losing his arm, right?”
Jun Do nodded.
The Captain shook his head. “You know, I’m real sorry about how they worked you over. I wanted to warn you, but it wouldn’t have made much difference.”
“Well, it’s over,” Jun Do said.
“The hard part’s over, and you took it well, no one else could’ve done what you did. Now comes the reward part,” the Captain said. “They’re going to give you some time to heal up, figure out exactly how things will work, and then they’re going to want to show you off. A hero who risked his life at gunpoint to save another hero who’d been fed to the sharks by Americans? Come on, you’re going to be a big story. They’re going to get some use out of you. After that thing with the Canning Master and then the captain of the Kwan Li, they need some good news. Anything you want, you’ll be able to name it.”
“I’ve already been to language school,” Jun Do said, then added, “You think it’s possible, I mean with the currents and all, that he could make it back?”
“We all love that boy,” the Captain said. “And mistakes were made, but he can’t come back. He’s not part of the story anymore. That’s not how the story goes now. You’ve got to get your head straight about that. The girl, she’s doing okay with this, right?”
But before Jun Do could answer, the Captain noticed the chart on the wall. The room was dim, and he stood with his candle. “What the hell,” he said. He started tearing out pins and dropping them to the floor. “A week he’s been gone, and still that kid is tormenting me.” He pulled the chart free. “Look,” the Captain said, “there’s something you should know. Before, when we thought the Second Mate hadn’t taken anything with him, we really hadn’t looked close enough. We didn’t think to check down in the hold, where your equipment was.”
“What are you saying?”
“One of your radios is gone. He took a radio with him.”
“Was it the black one?” Jun Do asked. “Or the one with the silver handles?”
“The one with the green dials,” the Captain said. “Is that going to be a problem? Is this going to hurt us?”
Jun Do could see it so clearly now, the Second Mate out on the raft in the dark with nothing but a battery, the green glow of a radio, and cigarettes without matches.
“That radio’s pretty basic,” Jun Do said. “We can scrounge another one.”
“That’s the spirit,” the Captain said. He put on a smile. “Here, here, I’m being an idiot, have some more tuna. And the girl, what do you think of her? I talked to her, you know. She has quite a high impression of you. What can I get you, is there anything you need?”
The beer was running right through Jun Do. “That jar over there,” he said. “Can you hand it to me.”
“Sure, sure,” the Captain said, but when he picked it up, he eyed it with great suspicion. He looked like he was going to smell it, but then he just passed it along.
Jun Do rolled to his side and brought the jar under the sheet with him. Then the only sound in the room was the sound of urine filling the jar in fits and spurts.
The Captain talked over the sound. “Well, you’re going to have to do some thinking. You’re a hero now, and they’re going to ask you what you want. How about it, is there anything you’d pick?”
When he was done, Jun Do opened his eyes. Then he carefully handed the jar to the Captain. “The only thing I’d like,” Jun Do said, “is to stay on the Junma. I feel comfortable there.”
“Of course you do,” the Captain said. “Your equipment’s there.”
“And there’s power at night.”
“And there’s power at night,” the Captain said. “Consider it done. You now live on the Junma. It’s the least I can do. But what is it you really want, something only the officials can give you?”
Jun Do hesitated. He took a pull of beer and tried to think of one thing that North Korea could give him that would make his life better.
The Captain sensed his hesitation and started describing others who’d done great deeds and the prizes they’d asked for, “like the guys in Yongbyon who put out the fire at the power plant—one of them got a car, it was in the paper. Another guy wanted his own telephone—done, no questions, they ran a wire to his apartment. When you’re a hero, that’s how it works.”
“I’d have to think about it,” Jun Do said. “You caught me a little off guard. I’m not so good off the top of my head.”
“See, I knew that,” said the Captain. “I knew that about you because we’re family. You’re the kind of guy who doesn’t want anything for himself. You’re a guy who doesn’t need much, but when it comes to other people, the sky’s the limit. You showed it the other day, you really proved it, and now you’re acting like family. I went to jail for my crew, you know. I’m no hero, but I took four years so my boys could go home. That’s how I showed it.”
The Captain was looking agitated, worried even. He was still holding the jar of urine, and Jun Do wanted to tell him to put it down. The Captain moved to the edge of his chair, like maybe he was going to come down to the pallet.
“Maybe it’s just ’cause I’m old,” the Captain said. “I mean, other people have problems. A lot of people have it worse off than me, but I just can’t live without her, I just can’t do it. It’s where my mind goes, it always goes back to that, and I’m not mad or resentful about how it happened, I just need my wife, I’ve got to have her back. And see, you can do that, you’re in a position to make that happen. Very soon, you’re going to be able to say the word, and anything can happen.”
Jun Do tried to speak, but the Captain cut him off. “She’s old—I know what you’re thinking. I’m old, too, but age doesn’t have anything to do with it. In fact, it only seems to get worse with each year. Who would have thought it would get worse? Nobody tells you that, nobody ever talks about that part.” The Captain heard some dogs moving across the roof, and he looked up at the ceiling. He set down the jar and stood. “We would be strangers for a while,” he said. “After I got her back, there would be things she couldn’t talk about, I know that. But a kind of discovery would begin, I’m sure of it. And then what we had would return.”
The Captain took up his chart. “Don’t say anything,” he said. “Don’t say anything at all. Just think about it, that’s all I ask.” Then, in the candlelight, the Captain rolled the chart tight with two hands. It was a gesture Jun Do had seen him make a thousand times. It meant that a bearing had been chosen, the men had been tasked, and whether full nets or empty lay ahead, a decision was made, events set in motion.