“I’m not sure.” He looked back over his shoulder toward the office.
“I’l go back in and have a look now, and then—do you need to go to your place to pick up some stuff, Hannah? I can fol ow you there if you like? That is . . . I thought I’d drive, if you’re okay with that. I figured you might like a break . . .”
Hannah shrugged. “Sure. My car’s here, in the parking lot. I have an overnight bag in the trunk that I packed when Camila and I thought we were going to stay in Yorktown. I can bring that, just in case. Otherwise, I’m good to go. But I’l wait here for you, if that’s al right. I’l take a minute and just check in on my mom.”
Camila left. Sean went back into the law school building in search of the photograph. Hannah retrieved her bag from the trunk of her car and telephoned her mother. Laura answered the cal on the first ring.
“Hannah.”
Shit. Laura’s voice was a rasp. She’d obviously been crying, which meant she’d been drinking. It took only Hannah’s name, said in precisely that way, for Hannah to understand what kind of state her mother was in.
“Oh, Mom.”
“I’m sorry. I’m so sorry. But you didn’t cal me. You said you would and then you didn’t.”
It would be useless to protest that she had cal ed, just later than planned. “It’s okay. Please, it’s okay. Where are you? Are you home?”
“Yes.”
“That’s good. Did you see Jan today? Did you go to your meeting?”
“I saw Jan. I can’t stop thinking about you out there. About the risks you’re taking. So then I . . . I’m sorry, Hannah.”
Laura didn’t drive. She’d lost her license a few years back and since then Hannah was the only one who drove the car. So how had she gotten her hands on alcohol? Jan wouldn’t have bought it for her. Laura must have had a stash somewhere. Damnit. Damn. That felt like such a betrayal. Or no. More likely she’d just cal ed a cab and had it drive her to the liquor store. Laura couldn’t help the drinking. She’d been through so much that had stripped her raw, torn away al of her defenses, and now sometimes the world was just too much for her. Alcohol was the anesthetic she chose to numb the pain. Hannah understood al that but sometimes it was hard.
Sometimes she felt let down or hurt or just overwhelmed. That wasn’t okay. That was taking Laura’s trauma and making it al about herself. She needed to be stronger than that.
“You know you can’t drink anymore, right? You have to stop now or you wil hurt yourself.”
“I’m sorry.” Laura was crying harder now.
Hannah drew a breath. “Do you need me to come home?”
“I . . . I don’t know . . .”
Hannah closed her eyes for a second. “The most important thing is that you’re okay. Al of this . . . none of it is worth doing if you’re going to be hurt by it.” The whole point of everything was to help Laura. To heal her.
“I’m al right.” Laura’s tone was stronger.
“Are you sure?”
There was a moment’s silence and then Laura spoke again and she sounded stronger, more together. “Do you feel like what you’re doing is making a difference?”
“Yes. Yes, I definitely do.” She lowered her voice. “Dandridge’s defense is weaker than I expected. I think what I’m doing is keeping everyone off balance. And there’l be other opportunities. I’m just getting started.”
“I wish you didn’t feel like you have to do this. I’m worried about the risks you’re taking. If you get caught, if they find out that you’ve been lying . . . they won’t al ow you to graduate. You could lose everything you’ve worked for. But I understand why you’re doing it.
And . . . I. . . .” Laura let her voice trail off and she was silent for a long moment before she spoke again. “Maybe it would make a difference if I could believe he’d final y paid the price for what he did.”
Hannah felt a flood of emotion that left her almost giddy— surprise and hope, combined with a fierce need not to let her mother down. “I’m going to cal Jan. She’l come over again and help, if you’l let her. I’l ask her to stay with you for the rest of the day, okay?”
“Yes, al right.”
“And I’l cal you tonight, fil you in on everything, and you can let me know how you’re doing.”
They talked a little bit longer until Hannah saw Sean coming back out of the building. He waved at her. Hannah waved back, held up one finger in a wait gesture. She ended the cal with her mother, then quickly cal ed Jan and explained the situation. The other woman agreed to go to the house and cook dinner and to visit three times a day for the next couple of days. Hannah said she would check in as soon as she could, then hung up and joined Sean.
“You okay?” he asked, giving her a sideways look.
“Yes, yes. Fine.”
“Everything okay with your mom?”
For a split second she blanked about the cancer story and was struck dumb, thinking irrational y that he had somehow overheard her conversation. Then memory came back.
“Uh . . . she had a bad night, but she’s okay. She’s reading.”
“That’s good. Good that she’s feeling okay today, I mean, and up to reading.” Sean took her bag from her and put it in the trunk of his car. They climbed in and he started the engine. “It can’t be easy for you,” he said. “You know, Rob’s a workaholic, but don’t let him push you around. If you need to be with your mom you need to tel him that. He’l have to deal with it.”
“No. It’s okay. My mom . . . she wants me to live my life. I want to be with her, of course, but she gets upset if she thinks I’m giving up opportunities to be with her.”
“I hear you. My mom is exactly like that. Independent as al get out. Hates it when I try to take care of her. Makes it hard to celebrate her birthday, or Mother’s Day.”
For a moment Hannah thought he was being sarcastic, but his expression was entirely sincere. “Real y?”
“Sure. I mean, obviously, it’s different for me. My mom’s not sick.
And I get back to see her a couple of times a semester. It must be real y hard for you.” He turned on the radio. Adele came on, singing her heart out about love and loss. He flipped the channel. “Nope.”
“Not a fan?”
“Definitely a fan. Just too sad for today. We need something with some energy.” Lizzo came on with “Truth Hurts.” “Oh, yeah.” He turned it up, grinned at her. “Now we’re talking.”
It was a four-hour drive to Charlotte. After a while they moved from the radio to music apps and playlists and mostly they just listened and talked music. When they were about two hours into the drive Sean changed the subject.
“Rob told me about your murder rule case.”
“Did he?”
“It sounds like it has a lot of potential.”