Chapter 21
Present Day
Gemma
I sat alone in my apartment with the lights dimmed. It was quiet, all except the rare sound of a car rushing by on the street outside. It was late but I couldn't sleep, not with all of the shit that was rushing around in my head.
I couldn't tell, in the heat of the moment, whether I'd done the right thing. I'd said some things that, maybe, I didn't mean. Or did I? I couldn't be sure right now.
I took a swig of wine from the bottle and set it down, empty, on my coffee table.
My mind was swirling, the drama of the night pounding away at me. I'd never broken up with anyone before. I'd had two proper boyfriends in the past, but I'd always been on the receiving end when things went sour.
I guess, in a way, I felt empowered. I was second guessing my decision but, at the same time, I knew it was the right one. I couldn't help this gnawing feeling that Cade was just using me, that he didn't care about me like I deserved to be cared about. I mean, I wasn't one of these girls who needed to be pampered and told they were loved every five minutes, but some sort of affection and sensitivity might be nice.
No, Cade never gave me that. He told me sometimes that I 'meant a lot to him', but I barely believed him. All he seemed to care about was boxing, fighting, winning. I was merely a tool for him to help him get there.
Did he care about me? Sure.
Did he care about me enough? Enough for me to stay with him? No.
I stood and walked over to the refrigerator, scanning for another bottle of wine. I felt slightly light-headed, my eyes sore from dried up tears, as I pulled a half empty bottle from the back.
It wasn't like me to turn to alcohol when I was feeling low, but then this situation was unique. Aside from my break-up with Cade I was so confused by what had happened with Zack. Everything had happened so quickly that we had no chance to talk about it.
There was just so much more between us than with me and Cade. There was this history, this deep caring. I'd loved him when I was younger, loved him as a friend. But there was more to it than that, there always was. He'd wanted to be more than friends back then, but I wasn't ready. Now, I felt the same desire in him, the same look in his eyes. It all made more sense than me and Cade, it all just fitted so well.
I heard the sound of another car rushing by outside as I slumped back onto my sofa. This time, though, it slowly came to a stop, the engine still rumbling quietly. I heard a door open and shut quickly and then, a moment later, the buzzer to my apartment started blaring frantically.
The sudden noise made me jump slightly as my heart began racing. Please don't be Cade, I can't deal with that right now.
I sat for a moment and did nothing. By all rights I should be asleep right now. The shrill noise of the buzzer ripped through the silence of the room again, cutting into my aching head.
Screw it.
I stood quickly and walked over to the door. “Who is it,” I said, my voice slightly irritated.
The response came quickly on the other end. “It's Zack. We need to talk.”
What, now? This surely wasn't the time to discuss things.
“Zack, do you have any idea what time it is?!”
“Yeah, I know it's late, but I need to speak with you.”
I signed deeply and reluctantly pushed the button to open the security door at the bottom. I heard a click downstairs and the door open, before shutting loudly. I opened the door and saw Zack coming up around the corner of the stairwell. His eyes were heavy as he stormed forwards and straight into my apartment.
He hadn't been here before, but took no time to look around.
“What happened tonight, what happened with you and Cade?” he asked, his voice quick and frantic.
“We broke up,” I said, shutting the door.
“And what did you say about me and you? Why did you tell him!”
“It just slipped out Zack. I was nervous and he was in my face. I was just explaining why we were late and it slipped out. Look, I'm sorry....why is it such a big deal? It's all my fault, not yours, and it's over now anyway, so...”
He ripped his hands through his hair and walked over towards my sofa, reaching down and picking the bottle of wine up from the coffee table. “Do you have anything stronger?”
I shook my head, and he took a long gulp.
“This is all f*cked up Gem. He's got this picture on his phone....someone took a picture of us together in the bar.”
A frown hit my face. “Yeah, so what. We were just having a drink.”
“Were we though?” he asked, walking towards me. His green eyes were shining in the dim light. He moved close, his voice lowering.
“Well...yeah. What else could we have been doing?”
He stared at me for a moment, his head slowly beginning to shake.
“The picture, Gemma...it looks like we're about to kiss, or have just kissed. Someone must have sent it to him.”
“What! Why?!”
“I was hoping you could tell me?”
“I have no idea. And anyway, we didn't kiss, we didn't do anything wrong.”
“I know. I tried telling him that, but he wouldn't listen.” His voice was beginning to deflate. He looked tired and weary, his eyes beginning to droop. “Everything's f*cked up Gemma, they all hate me now.”
He moved over to the sofa and sat down, leaning forward with his head in his hands. He sat motionless, like a statue, caught in a moment of despair.
I moved over and sat down next to him, wrapping my arm around him. He was breathing slowly, deeply, his head beginning to shake lightly.
I didn't know what to say to him. He looked grief-stricken, as though his world had just come crumbling down around him.
“They don't hate you Zack,” I said consolingly. “This is all just a big mix up, a big mistake. They're realize that soon.”
He looked up and turned to me, his eyes glistening slightly with tears. “They won't. We've been lying to them all along....they won't believe us on this.”
I pulled him in for a hug. He seemed vulnerable, emotional, weakened by the night's events. I knew that family was everything to him, that his family really was his life. To have them think of him in this way, to have them believe that he'd betray his twin brother, would tear him up.
But then, had the clock not chimed, had it not broken us from the spell, we would have kissed. We were being inexorably drawn together, and I knew that it was what we both wanted.
He leaned back from my hug and we sat together, unspeaking, on the sofa. I could feel the weight of sleep beginning to descend onto me now, my eyelids growing heavy. We were both drained, neither with the energy to keep talking.
The nights events were repeating in my mind as my eyes closed, the world growing dark and warm around me.
Everything will seem better in the morning. They always did.
….
Zack
My eyes slowly opened as streaks of bright sunlight flashed across the room. I looked down to see Gemma stirring on the sofa next to me, curled up into an awkward position against my body. In the cold light of the morning she looked so pale, so tender, so soft.
My mind was still burning as I looked at a clock hung on the wall in the corner. It said 8 AM. What time had I got here? I'd only been sleeping for a few hours.
But I was quickly wide awake, my head still rocking from the previous evening That picture...who would do that? Someone who had something against me? Against Gemma? My mind was blank in its search for answers.
I'd come over hoping Gemma might know, but she was as in the dark as me. But what could I do? Keep protesting my innocence? They wouldn't believe me.
And how innocent were we really? How innocent was I? It was only the sound of the clock that stopped me from kissing her. Maybe I did deserve what was happening to me. Maybe it was all fair.
I stood up, carefully moving Gemma onto the sofa, and walked into the kitchen to grab a glass of water. Her place was small, but cosy. Unlike my own apartment it was in pristine condition, everything in it's rightful place.
I heard a light coughing behind me and looked over to see Gemma sit up on the sofa, stretching out her limbs like a lioness under the morning sun.
“Hey,” she croaked, rubbing her eyes, “what happened last night.”
I filled her a glass of water and walked over to her. “I guess we passed out.”
I handed her the glass and she took a long sip, grimacing and rubbing her head. “I feel awful. What time is is?”
“Just past 8.”
“What! It's too early for a Saturday,” she moaned.
“Yeah, look, I'd better go. You should get some more sleep, we can talk about all of this when our heads are straight.”
She nodded, in no position to argue, and stood up. I walked towards the door, my body aching and cold.
“I'll come down with you,” she said, “I could do with the fresh air.”
We walked together in silence, an exhaustion in my body. My mind felt awake, alert, still battling the previous nights events, but my body was weak and drained. The sunshine was warm to my skin as we stepped out of the building, it's rays giving me life.
“It'll all be OK,” Gemma said, noticing the strain in my eyes. “Things will work themselves out.” I didn't have her optimism.
We stood close, face to face outside the building, her eyes weary and consoling. She wore no make-up, yet looked so pretty and pure. There was an innocence about her that I'd always loved.
She put her hand to my face and pulled me in for a hug, kissing my cheek. As she did I saw a flash out of the corner of my eye and turned, quickly, to look at the other side of the road.
There, ducking for cover behind an old station wagon, was a hooded figure, wrapped up warm with a camera in hand. He shot off as soon as I saw him, rushing off down the street.
Without giving it a seconds thought I gave chase, ripping myself from Gemma's arms and running after him. I had no time to say goodbye, no time to stop and think. I just ran after the f*cking paparazzo.
I shot off down the street, trying to make up the ground between us. He was fast, but I was faster, getting closer and closer as my body burst to life. I could feel the adrenaline pumping through me, giving me speed. It was him, last night. It was him in the bar. It was him who'd f*cked everything up for me.
The mystery figure turned round a corner, moving down a side street. My lungs were burning as I quickened my pace, desperate not to lose him. I turned round the same corner, seeing him shooting off down the darkened alley. A fence blocked the path up ahead, but he jumped and climbed quickly over it, dropping to the other side. I followed, leaping straight to the top of the fence, and flung my chest over.
I was gaining on him, cutting the space between us, as the chase continued. There was a light at the end of the alley, the sun shining and glaring off a series of trash cans. The glint made it difficult to see as my target disappeared around the next corner. I kept moving, bursting into the morning light.
I looked desperately down the street but couldn't see him. Where had he gone?
I ran the way he'd turned, sprinting off and looking for side streets he might have turned down. The street was empty. I couldn't see anyone.
Then, suddenly, I heard tires screeching as a car came shooting out of an alley just ahead of me. I could see the hooded figure inside, hunched over the wheel as the vehicle roared away from me. I ran, gaining on it briefly, but it soon picked up speed, gradually stretching further away from me down the road.
“DAMN IT!” I roared.
I'd lost him. He was gone.