CHAPTER FORTY-FIVE
The landscape was barren and hot. They had covered my eyes through two more segments of the journey. Each time they pulled the hood from my head, a new world seemed to spread out before me. The one we faced now was dry and unforgiving. Because of the intense heat, they slowed for the first time and were able to converse with each other, though they spoke only in their own tongue.
It was long past the time I was to meet Rafe. There were so many things I had wanted to say to him. Things I needed to say that he would never know now. He was probably already on his way home to his farm, believing I’d broken my promise to meet him.
I eyed the low hazy mountains in the distance, then turned to look back, but saw only more of the same behind me. How close to Terravin was Pauline by now?
Kaden saw me assessing the harsh panorama. “You’re quiet,” he said.
“Really? Forgive me. What shall we talk about? The weather?”
He didn’t answer. I didn’t expect him to, but I stared at him long and hard. I knew he felt my seething gaze, though he fixed his sights straight ahead.
“Do you need some water?” he asked, without looking at me.
I desperately wanted a drink, but didn’t want to take any from him. I turned to Eben, who was riding on my other side. “Boy, may I have my canteen back?” The last time they had unbound my hands and taken the hood off, I’d swung the canteen at Kaden’s head, so they confiscated it. Eben looked at Kaden, waiting for him to decide. Kaden nodded.
I took a deep swig and then another. Judging by this landscape, I knew I dared not waste any by dousing my shirt. “Are we still in Morrighan?” I asked.
Kaden half smiled, half grunted. “You don’t know your own country’s borders? How very royal.”
My caution snapped. It was the worst possible time to make a run for it, but I kicked my heels into my horse’s sides, and we flew over the hard-packed sand. The gallop of hooves was so swift and steady, it sounded like a hundred drums pounding out one continuous beat.
I couldn’t escape—there was nowhere to go in this vast empty basin. If I kept this pace up for long, the relentless heat would kill my horse. I pulled on the reins and gave him free lead so he could regain his breath and rhythm. I rubbed my hand on his mane and poured some precious water over his muzzle trying to help him cool out.
I looked back, expecting them to be upon me, but they only leisurely and smugly advanced forward. They weren’t going to risk their own horses when they knew I was trapped in this godsforsaken wasteland.
For now.
That became my silent invocation.
When they caught up with me, Kaden and I exchanged a severe glance but no more words were spoken.
The ride was endless. The sun disappeared behind us. My backside ached. My neck pinched. My clothes chafed. My cheeks burned. I guessed we had traveled a hundred miles.
The haze finally gave way to brilliant orange as the departing sun set the sky ablaze. Just ahead was a gigantic outcropping of boulders as large as a manor house that looked like they had been dropped straight from the sky into the middle of this wilderness. There was another flurry of words, and Griz did a lot of pointing and bellowing. He was the only one who didn’t speak Morrighese. Malich and Finch both had thick accents, and Eben spoke as flawlessly as Kaden.
The horses seemed to sense that this was to be our camp for the night and picked up their pace. As we got closer, I saw a spring and tiny pool at the base of one boulder. This wasn’t a random stop. They knew their path as well as any vultures of the desert might.
“Here,” Kaden said to me simply as he slid from his horse.
I tried not to wince as I dismounted. I didn’t want to be so very royal. I stretched, testing to see which part was in the most pain. I turned and glared at the group. “I’m going around to the other side of these rocks to take care of some personal business. Do not follow me.”
Eben lifted his chin. “I’ve seen a lady’s bum before.”
“Well, you’re not going to see mine. Stay.”
Malich laughed, the first laugh I had heard from any of them, and Finch rubbed his shoulder and scowled, throwing the dried bloody rag that had been stuffed beneath his shirt to the ground. It was certain I was on his bad side, but it had obviously been a clean wound, or he’d be in much worse shape. I wished I had dipped my knife in poison. I marched to the other side, taking wide berth around Griz, and found a dark private place to pee.
I emerged from the shadows. They would have killed me by now if they intended to. What were their intentions if not to murder me? I sat down on a low rock and looked at the foothills, maybe a mile away. Or three? Distance was deceptive in this shimmering hot flatland. After dark would I be able to see my way well enough to escape there? And then what? I at least needed my canteen and knife to survive.
“Lia?”
Kaden sauntered around a boulder, his eyes searching the rocks in the fading light until he saw me. I stared at him as he walked closer, his duplicity hitting me deeply and sorely, not with the wild anger of this morning but with a gripping ache. I had trusted him.
With each step he took, all of my thoughts about him unfurled into something new, like a tapestry being flipped to its backside, revealing a tangle of knots and ugliness. Only a few weeks ago I had nursed his shoulder. Only a few nights ago, Pauline had said his eyes were kind. Only two nights ago, I had danced with him, and just yesterday, I had kissed his cheek in the meadow. You’re a good person, Kaden. Steadfast and true to your duty.
How little I had known what that meant to Kaden. I looked away. How could he have so completely and utterly duped me? The dry sand crunched under his boots. His steps were slow and measured. He stopped a few feet away.
The ache reached to my throat.
“Tell me this much,” I whispered. “Are you the assassin that Venda sent to kill me?”
“Yes.”
“Then why am I still alive?”
“Lia—”
“Just the truth, Kaden. Please. I kept my word to you and came along without a struggle. You owe me that much.” I feared that something worse than death was still in store for me.
He took another step so he was standing directly in front of me. His face looked more gentle and recognizable. Was it because his comrades weren’t here to see him?
“I decided you’d be more useful to Venda alive than dead,” he said.
He decided. Like a distant god. Today Lia shall live.
“Then you’ve made a strategic error,” I said. “I have no state secrets. No military strategies. And I’m worthless for a ransom.”
“You still have other value. I told the others that you have the gift.”
“You what?” I shook my head. “Then you lied to your—”
He grabbed my wrists and yanked me to my feet, holding me inches from his face. “It’s the only way I could save you,” he hissed, keeping his voice low. “Do you understand? So never deny that you have the gift. Not to them. Not to anyone. It’s all that’s keeping you alive.”
My knees were as thin as water. “If you didn’t want to kill me, why didn’t you just leave Terravin? Tell them the job was finished, and they’d be none the wiser.”
“So you could return to Civica and create an alliance with Dalbreck? Just because I don’t want to kill you doesn’t mean I’m not still loyal to my own kind. Never forget that, Lia. Venda always comes first. Even before you.”
Fire surged through my blood, my bones; my knees became solid again, tendon, muscle, flesh, hot and rigid. I pulled my wrists free from his grasp.
Forget? Never.