He moves as though manacled, dragging my secrets behind him.
‘It’s my fault,’ he mutters. ‘I knew you weren’t to be trusted, but my affection for your mother...’
He shakes his head, pushing by me to collect my shirt from the bathtub. There’s a resignation to his actions that frightens me.
‘I didn’t mean to—’ I begin.
‘You used me to steal from Ted Stanwin,’ he says quietly, gripping the edges of the counter. ‘A man who can ruin me with a snap of his fingers.’
‘I’m sorry,’ I say.
He turns suddenly, his anger thick.
‘You’ve made that word cheap, Jonathan! You said it after we covered up that business in Enderleigh House, and again at Little Hampton. Remember? Now you’d have me swallow this hollow apology as well.’
He presses my shirt against my chest, his cheeks flushed red. Tears stand in his eyes. ‘How many women have you forced yourself upon? Do you even remember? How many times have you wept at your mother’s breast, begging her to fix it, promising never to do it again and knowing full well that you would? And now here you are again, doing the same to me, bloody, stupid Doctor Dickie. Well, I’m done, I can’t stomach it any more. You’ve been a blight on this world ever since I brought you into it.’
I take an imploring step towards him, but he pulls a silver pistol from his pocket, letting it dangle by his side. He’s not even looking at me.
‘Get out, Jonathan, or by God, I’ll shoot you myself.’
Keeping one eye on the pistol, I back out of the room, closing the door as I step into the corridor.
My heart’s thumping.
Doctor Dickie’s gun is the very same one Evelyn will use to take her life tonight. He’s holding the murder weapon.
29
Quite how long I stare at Jonathan Derby in my bedroom mirror, it’s impossible to say. I’m looking for the man within, some hint of my real face.
I want Derby to see his executioner.
Whisky warms my throat, the bottle plundered from the drawing room and already half empty. I need it to stop my hands from shaking as I try to knot my bow tie. Doctor Dickie’s testimony confirmed what I already knew. Derby’s a monster, his crimes washed away by his mother’s money. There’s no justice waiting for this man, no trial or punishment. If he’s to pay for what he’s done, I’ll have to march him to the gallows myself, and that’s what I intend to do.
First though, we’re going to save Evelyn Hardcastle’s life.
My gaze is drawn towards Doctor Dickie’s silver pistol, lying harmless on an armchair like a fly swatted out of the air. Stealing it was a simple matter, as easy as sending a servant with an invented emergency to lure the doctor out of his room while I slipped in afterwards and took it from his nightstand. For too long I’ve allowed this day to dictate terms to me, but no longer. If somebody wishes to murder Evelyn with this pistol, they’ll have to come through me first. The Plague Doctor’s riddle be damned! I don’t trust him and I won’t stand idly by while horrors play out in front of me. It’s time Jonathan Derby finally did some good on this earth.
Slipping the pistol into my jacket pocket, I take one last mouthful of whisky and step out into the corridor, following the other guests down the staircase to dinner. Unlike their manners, their taste is impeccable. Evening gowns expose naked backs and pale skin adorned with glittering jewellery. The listlessness of earlier is gone, their charm extravagant. At last, as evening calls, they’ve come alive.
As always, I keep an eye out for some hint of the footman among these passing faces. He’s long overdue a visit, and the longer the day goes on, the more certain I become that something dreadful is coming. At least it’ll be a fair fight. Derby has very few laudable qualities, but his anger makes him a handful. I’ve barely been able to keep hold of him, so I can’t imagine what it would be like to see him flying at you, dripping hate.
Michael Hardcastle’s standing in the entrance hall with a painted-on smile, greeting those coming down the stairs, as though genuinely glad to see every last wretched one of them. I had intended on questioning him about the mysterious Felicity Maddox, and the note at the well, but it will have to wait until later. There’s an impregnable wall of taffeta and bow ties between us.
Piano music drags me through the crowds into the long gallery, where guests are mingling with drinks as servants prepare the dining hall on the other side of the doors. Taking a whisky from one of the passing trays, I keep an eye out for Millicent. I’d hoped to give Derby his goodbyes, but she’s nowhere to be seen. In fact, the only person I recognise is Sebastian Bell, who’s drifting through the entrance hall on his way to his room.
Stopping a maid, I ask after Helena Hardcastle, hoping the lady of the house might be near at hand, but she hasn’t arrived. That means she’s been missing all day. Absence has officially become disappearance. It can’t be coincidence that Lady Hardcastle is nowhere to be found on the day of her daughter’s death, though whether she’s a suspect or a victim I can’t be sure. One way or another, I’m going to find out.
My glass is empty, my head becoming foggy. I’m surrounded by laughter and conversation, friends and lovers. The good cheer is stirring Derby’s bitterness. I can feel his disgust, his loathing. He hates these people, this world. He hates himself.
Servants slip past me with silver platters, Evelyn’s last meal arriving in a procession.
Why isn’t she afraid?
I can hear her laughter from here. She’s mingling with the guests as though all her days lie ahead, yet when Ravencourt brought up the danger this morning, it was clear she knew something was amiss.
Discarding my glass, I make my way through the entrance hall and into the corridor towards Evelyn’s bedroom. If there are answers, perhaps that’s where I’ll find them.