For some na?ve reason, I’d thought my brother could have outgrown this hatred. That he would never be a fan of mine but wouldn’t wish me ill, either. That he might be mad that Mom had left the property to me but would get over it. That he would’ve grown up. Matured. But he hadn’t gotten over anything.
Hayes’ jaw ticked as he framed my face with those rough hands. Hands I was beginning to know by touch alone. The pads of his fingertips. The raised scar on his palm. “I’m so sorry, Ev. I had to send a deputy out to talk to him and Allen since we’ve had a few run-ins lately. It’s just procedure.”
“I know.” This was why Hayes and I would never be. Because my family would destroy it. Just like they ate away at any other good thing in my life. I’d been so stupid to think that all I had to do was face them again to put this haunting anger to rest. They’d never be done with me.
I blinked around the room, a worried Kelly and Tim filling Miles in on what’d happened. I loved working here. And I truly believed I could create a sanctuary at home that was so needed in our community. But maybe I’d have to give that up, too.
“I don’t like where your head’s at right now.”
I focused back on Hayes. “It’s not anywhere.”
“Bullshit.” His thumbs sweeping back and forth across my cheeks took away some of the sting of the word. “You’re thinking about running. Don’t.”
I clamped my mouth closed. How was it that in a matter of months, Hayes could read my mind and decipher my tells better than anyone ever had before?
“You run, I’ll chase you.”
“I shouldn’t have come back,” I whispered. “I knew they wouldn’t be happy to see me, but I thought…sixteen years. That’s more than enough time to take away some of the sting. Figured they’d have moved on, and I could do what I needed to.”
“They don’t get to stop you from finding your peace.”
“What peace?” I waved my hand around the waiting room, now teeming with officers. “There is none.”
He gripped my face more firmly, making me meet his gaze. “You have to fight for it.”
I let my head tip forward to rest on his. “I’m too tired to fight.”
“Then you rest for a little while and pick up the sword again when you’re ready. There are other people who can hold it for you in the meantime.”
Other people, who would quickly grow tired of its heavy weight. And then they would walk away, too.
Hayes pressed a soft kiss to my temple. “Just rest.”
“Okay.”
It didn’t matter either way. I would just have to hold on until everyone walked away. Then I could leave on my terms.
“Why the hell haven’t you arrested him?”
My head snapped up at Tim’s biting words. Hayes stood, his hand going to my shoulder. “Careful, Tim.”
He waved an arm towards the door. “He just barged in here. He could’ve had a weapon. Could’ve hurt her or worse.”
I struggled to my feet, my legs still feeling a bit wobbly. “He’s doing everything he can, Tim.”
“There’s an all-points bulletin out on him now. We’re going to bring him in.”
“And then what?” Tim demanded.
“Then, Everly is going to file a restraining order.”
I opened my mouth to argue and then shut it again. I’d have to file the papers, if only in hopes of protecting my employer’s business. That was if I even still had a job. Maybe my time in Wolf Gap would be coming to a close sooner than expected. My chest constricted with the thought that, one day, I wouldn’t feel those familiar hands cupping my face anymore. Would never push into that touch. And that was enough to break my heart, more than a little.
33
Hayes
“Stop hovering. It’s annoying, and it’s starting to piss me off.”
My father covered his chuckle with a cough at Everly’s words. I sent a scowl in his direction before stopping my pacing to rub Ev’s shoulders. She, Dad, and Shiloh were poring over some plans for the rest of the paddocks, including some sort of weird play equipment for the goats that would one day be housed in one of them.
I pressed into the knots along her shoulder blades. “I’m not hovering.”
“You are,” Shiloh muttered.
“Traitor.”
Everly turned in her seat, shaking my hands free. “Go have a beer with Calder.”
“He said he was fine coming here.”
“And I said you’re driving me crazy. Go. We’re not going to be invaded by zombies, and my brother is locked up at the station.”
It had taken us all day to track Ian down, and I’d chosen to hold him. I hoped a night sleeping next to whatever intoxicated individual my deputies brought in might loosen his tongue. And, in the meantime, Everly had signed the papers we’d put before a judge. She now had an emergency restraining order in place. She’d have to go back for a permanent one in a few weeks, but at least we had something.
I just wasn’t overly convinced that Ian would take it seriously or that her uncle wouldn’t retaliate in some way. I’d been on edge all afternoon and had a deputy sitting outside the vet’s office just in case. “I just want to make sure you’re safe.”
She motioned around the room. “I’ve got company with cell phones if there’s an emergency. I’ve got Koda. And I’ve got Betty.”
My brows pulled together. “Betty?”
“My shotgun.”
Shiloh snorted a laugh and leaned back in her chair. “Get lost, brother. You’re cramping our style.”
I’d noticed that Shiloh was talking a little more since she’d built a sort of friendship with Everly. Not epic, heartfelt confessions or anything but simply joining in a little more—even if it was at my expense.
“Go on, Hayes. We won’t leave until you’re back,” my father said.
Everly stiffened. “I appreciate the gesture, Gabe, but I’m perfectly capable of watching my own back. I’ve been doing it a long time.”
He eyed Everly carefully. “I know you’re more than capable, but that doesn’t mean you shouldn’t ever have help.”
“And you’ve helped more than enough. You don’t need to be locked up in this cabin with me because my brother said something stupid. He has always had a big mouth.”
One that spewed threats I knew he’d made good on.
Everly sighed when no one said anything. “It’s important to me that I have control of my own life. I don’t want to feel like I’m being herded or cornered. And they don’t get to influence my life. Not anymore.”
“She’s right,” Shy agreed. “Ev can take care of herself. She’s not stupid. She’s letting Hayes stay here nights, even though he’s annoying as all get out. Let that be enough.”
Ev reached under the table and squeezed Shy’s knee, mouthing, “Thank you.” Shiloh moved away from the touch but nodded in acceptance of the gratitude.
“Okay. I’m gonna go meet Calder for an hour or two—”
“Two,” Everly interjected.
“All right, two.” I bent and pressed a kiss to her temple. “I’m not trying to control you,” I whispered. “And I know you can take care of yourself. But anyone can be taken by surprise. It’s the same reason I take backup to question a suspect.”
She relaxed a fraction. “Have fun with Calder.”
I started for the door. “I will. I left you whoopie pies on the counter.”