‘Well, really I came to talk about something el-’ I began, but that was about as far as I got.
‘Is he tall?’ Eve demanded. She had stopped dancing around me and was now bobbing up and down in front of me like an overexcited puppy. ‘Is he handsome? Is he rich? Will you marry him and go live on a vast estate in the country somewhere?’
‘Eve!’ I said, shocked. ‘Where’s your pride as an independent woman?’
‘Right here,’ she said, indicating her head. ‘Now will you tell me whether he’s rich and handsome?’
‘Look,’ I said, crossing my arms defiantly, ‘this isn’t what I came here to talk about!’
‘Too bad.’ Patsy grinned at me over tiny Eve’s head. ‘Because it’s apparently what you’re going to have to talk about.’
‘But-’
‘What’s his name?’ Eve interrupted me eagerly. ‘Does he live in London? Well of course he does, or you wouldn’t have been gone all that time. You were with him, weren’t you? Were you two up to anything, you know… special?’
She winked, and then winked a couple of times more in case I hadn’t gotten it. I had, and so apparently had everybody else in the vicinity. The looks from passers-by had become a good deal more disapproving.
I would have to stop this. Ella I could deal with, but these three were of another calibre entirely. I would have to placate them somehow. Inspiration struck me!
‘I haven’t got a lover, all right?’ I hissed. ‘Now stop it, you’re making people stare.’
‘Oh.’ Eve stopped bobbing up and down, obviously deflated. ‘But… but Patsy said…’
‘Patsy said what Ella told her.’
‘And what you told Ella wasn’t one hundred per cent true?’ Patsy guessed, her grin having widened after a momentary flicker.
‘Actually,’ I corrected, ‘it’s not even one per cent true. But I couldn’t correct Ella at the time. She mustn’t know.’
‘So what is it you have been up to these last few weeks?’ Patsy sounded quite demanding, and when Patsy Cusack demanded, you didn’t deny her. She might be inclined to back up her demands with a swipe of her mighty parasol, the destroyer of worlds.
‘You mustn’t tell a soul,’ I whispered, grabbing the three of them by the arms and dragging them away from the people in the park, who were still muttering about loose morals in this modern age and unladylike behaviour. ‘Especially not Ella. She mustn’t know what I’m doing.’
We ended up by the same bench behind the discreet clump of bushes where we had sat before. It was our favourite spot. Nobody ever bothered us there.
‘So it has something to do with Ella?’ Eve enquired eagerly, sitting down beside me, her disappointment at my lack of romantic entanglements already forgotten. ‘What you’ve been doing all this time, I mean?’
‘Yes, very much so. She’s in danger.’
All their faces became more serious instantly, especially Flora's. They all liked Ella, and Flora recognized in her something like a kindred spirit, somebody so gentle and meek she made a dove look like a hunting hawk in comparison.
‘Explain,’ she said in a quiet voice, regarding me with large eyes full of worry.
‘Well…’ I bit my lip, thinking. ‘I’m not quite sure how to explain. Um… do you know a Sir Philip Wilkins?’
Patsy snorted. ‘What? That flower-obsessed nincompoop?’
Surprised, I turned towards her. I hadn’t actually expected any of my friends to know him. Just like me, they weren’t all that fond of male society.
‘You know him, Patsy?’
‘Sure I do! About a year back I met him at a ball. He started showering me with flowers and calling me stuff like “Delight of my heart” and “Summer Rose” and worse things I wouldn’t want to repeat with ladies present. I made it quite clear that I didn’t appreciate such behaviour.’
For a moment I wondered how Patsy had made herself 'quite clear'. Then, looking at her big, meaty fists I thought it best to stop wondering.
‘Well,’ I continued, ‘it’s him that Ella is in danger from.’
Patsy stared at me, her face blank.
‘You’re joking.’
‘No, I’m not.’
‘What has he done? Threatened her with a bouquet of tulips or something?’
‘Worse. He wants to marry her.’
Patsy barked a laugh. ‘So he’s up to his old tricks again. Well, what a terrible danger!’
She stopped laughing when she saw the look on mine and Flora’s faces.
‘I’m sorry,’ she said, pulling her face into the best imitation of contriteness that was possible for Patsy. ‘He’s really after her?’
‘With a vengeance,’ I affirmed. ‘And tons of green stuff.’
‘But I really don't see the problem,’ Patsy mused, frowning. ‘He’s after her. So what? Why doesn't she just say no?’ I opened my mouth to answer, but she had already held up her hand, understanding flashing in her eyes. ‘Don’t bother, forget I said that. I forgot it was Ella we were talking about.’
‘It… it isn’t always easy to say “no” when people want something from you,’ Flora interposed. ‘Especially men.’
‘I beg to differ,’ Patsy said, firmly. ‘It’s very easy indeed. But I admit there are those unfortunates who don't seem to have understood that fact yet.’
‘So if she won’t say no to him what happens now?’ Eve asked. ‘Will that mean she’ll have to marry him and have a whole lot of babies and grow fat and mopy because she really wanted to do something else with her life but she never said it out loud and so she’ll die a tragic death from sadness and nobody will know why?’
‘Well…’ I said, carefully, ‘I was hoping to avoid that kind of thing. I spent the last few weeks trying to find a way out for her.’
‘Daft of you not to ask us,’ Patsy said with her typical talent for delicacy. ‘It’s always better to have help.’
‘I didn’t want to burden you with my problems.’ I lowered my head. That much was actually true.
‘That’s what friends are for, you dolt! You have to burden them with all kinds of problems, so they can unload their misery on you in return.’
Looking up again, I gave them a tentative smile. ‘I’ll remember that in future, Patsy. Will you still help me?’
They all nodded - Eve about three times as fast as the others and Flora rather hesitantly, but they all nodded.
‘So what should we do?’ Patsy lifted her parasol and let it smack several times into her palm. A thug with an iron crowbar could not have looked more threatening. ‘Do you think I should have a talk with this Sir Philip Wilkins? Just him and me and my parasol?’
If only things could be so simple. Shaking my head regretfully, I said: ‘I’m afraid that wouldn’t be a good solution. Wilkins always has heaps of servants around him wherever he goes, except in ballrooms. And you can’t just haul off and let him have it in the middle of a ballroom. Besides, I think your mother got suspicious after that incident with Mr Wright last summer. I don't think she entirely believed your story about your parasol having been chewed up by a rabid spaniel.’
Patsy shrugged. ‘Yes, but the man lived. So even if she had found out, it wouldn’t have been that serious.’
‘But don't you see,’ I insisted, ‘in this case, in Ella’s case, nobody must even suspect, let alone find out for certain, that I had a hand in this matter. Either my aunt or Wilkins must drop the acquaintance of the other of their own accord. If we were involved in the matter, Ella would feel mortified to find out what you were doing! She might marry the fellow just to prove it wasn’t necessary and show everyone what a good, sweet girl she is.’
Slowly, Patsy nodded, though she still looked regretfully at her parasol.
‘I see what you mean. If anybody could be that silly, she could.’
With indignation I crossed my arms in front of my chest. ‘My sister is not silly!’
Patsy gave me a searching gaze. I relented.
‘Well, maybe a tiny little bit. But it’s not nice to say it.’
‘I’m not known for being nice. That’s why I’ll never have to worry about an unwanted matrimonial arrangement.’ She thought for a moment. ‘So what are you going to do if you’re not going to act directly?’ she finally enquired.