I press my hand to my head. God, I’m getting a headache from the stress.
“I need to get home,” Greyson says, and if I didn’t know any better, I’d guess he was saving me from my inner conflict. “But I’ll call you tomorrow and give you all the details about the show. The time, place, and whatnot. Jenna and Ari are going to be driving. I hope that’s okay.”
“Of course.” I turn to slide the keycard through the slot, feeling flustered for some reason.
“Seth,” he says tentatively as I’m opening the door.
I pause without turning around. “Yeah.” My voice shakes a little, which is ridiculous.
I’ve never been the nervous type, not even the first time Braiden and I kissed. It just kind of happened and I felt excited, but never nervous.
His hand touches my arm and he gives me a little tug. I turn around without thinking and he leans in and brushes his lips against mine. He kisses more tentatively than I’m used to, as if he’s nervous, too, which makes me feel a little better, yet I’m still a little hesitant. When my hands find his arms and grip tight, he backs me up into the wall and deepens the kiss. Suddenly, my reservations go right out the window and I’m completely and utterly turned on. It’s been so long since I’ve wanted a guy this much.
I wish I could say that it erases all the pain inside me, that the scars and memories suddenly fade away and are forgotten in an instant. But that’s the thing about scars. They always stay with us, whether visible or unseen. It doesn’t mean that I have to let them control me, though, so I let go and kiss him back with everything I have in me, allowing myself to momentarily forget about the terrible stuff that happened to me.
He tastes minty and I can’t figure out why. All I saw him drink was Bacardi tonight, and I wonder if he popped a mint in anticipation of this moment. I find the idea cutely amusing and smile against his lips.
He pulls away slightly. “What’s so funny?”
“Nothing.” I chuckle again, sliding one of my hands around the back of his neck and kissing him far less timidly.
Our bodies press together and I can feel how much he wants me as he gently grinds his hips against me. God, I forgot how much I loved to kiss and touch. I get so into it I almost forget where we are. When someone drives by and honks their horn, I immediately pull away, catching my breath and trying to process what just happened.
Greyson looks like he’s teetering somewhere between being high and turned on as he backs up, his mouth tugged to a lopsided grin. “So, thanks and um, yeah, I’ll text you tomorrow with the details.” He rakes his fingers through his hair and he kind of trips over his feet as he turns for the grass.
I smile at the sight of his awkward side coming out. “And there it is.”
He gives me a wave from over his shoulder before disappearing down the sidewalk. I turn for the door, taking a few deep breaths to calm myself down before I slip my keycard through the slot again and walk inside.
I instantly freeze when I spot Luke lounging in one of the chairs inside the entrance.
“Hey, man,” he says with a chin nod.
My heart pounds in my chest and blood roars in my eardrums. Did he just see us kiss? The taste of dirt floods my mouth. Stop thinking about it, Seth, and relax. Just breathe. Everything will be okay. “Hey…” I glance around the empty room. “What’re you doing down here?”
He shrugs, sitting up in the chair. “Well, I was going to go up to my room, but then Kayden texted me saying that Callie was spending the night and that I should crash somewhere else.”
“What the fuck?” I storm for the elevator. “I told him to keep his hands off her.”
Luke clumsily trips to his feet. “Would you relax?” He grabs my arm, stopping me. “He’s not sleeping with her. He’s letting her crash because of some red scarf on the doorknob or something.”
“How the hell do I know that’s true? I don’t really know him. Or you, for that matter.”
Luke pulls out his phone, taps the screen, and hands it to me. “Here, read his text. It should give you some peace of mind.”
I glance down at the message.
Kayden: Hey, I’m taking Callie back to our place because there was a red scarf on her doorknob. Could you find a place to crash? She’s a little nervous around people she doesn’t know and I don’t want her worried about anything.
“All right, that’s actually kind of sweet.” I hand him his phone, relaxing a little. “Where are you going to crash, though?”
Luke points at the front door. “I’m actually waiting for someone to pick me up for a party.”
“Weren’t you just at one?”
“Yeah, so? I want to keep the fun going. Besides, I’m not even close to being tired.”
“All right, gotcha.” I pull out my phone and send Callie a text to call me the moment she wakes up. “I’m actually not that tired myself.”
In fact, I’m extremely wired. My mind is racing with thoughts of Greyson’s kiss and how soft his lips felt, how fucking amazing it felt to be kissed again. The idea of going to sleep seems absurdly implausible.
“You want to go out with us?” He glances at the parking lot just outside the window. “We’re thinking about hitting up this place called Red Ink that’s supposed to have cheap drinks and killer music.”
I put my phone away. “Who are you going with?”
“A girl I met at the party,” he says, looking back at me. “If you want, we can chase down Greyson and see if he wants to go, too.”
I try to keep my shock under control. Luke obviously witnessed me kissing Greyson. My first kiss out in the open. My first kiss since the assault.
“You’d be okay with that?”
“Why the fuck wouldn’t I be? Greyson’s cool. You’re cool. We’re all just living one fun-filled life of coolness.”
I study him closely, wondering if he’s for real. He seems dead serious and kind of confused about why I’m staring at him.
I decide I’m going to do it. I’ve already taken a few big steps tonight, so why not just keep going? Nothing bad has happened yet. I can do this.
“Okay, I’m always down for clubbing.” I retrieve my phone again. “I’m going to text Greyson, though, because I’m not about to run down the sidewalk after him. It goes against my lifetime vow of never exercising.”
He laughs, plopping down in the chair again. “Sounds good.”
I pause, thinking about what I should say in the text.
Me: Hey, so Luke Price and an unknown girl invited me to the Red Ink. He invited u, too.
I hit send and quickly type up another message.
Me: Oh yeah, I’d really like it if u went.
“How do you even know Greyson?” I ask Luke while I wait for Greyson to reply.
“We’re in Bio together. He’s actually my lab partner. He seems pretty cool.” His attention whips to the side as headlights shine through the window. “And there’s our ride.” He hops to his feet and heads to the door with me following.
By the time we reach the parking lot, Greyson hasn’t text back. Totally deserved, I think to myself, for blowing him off so often.
I’m about to climb into the car when my phone vibrates. I smile as I fish it out.
Greyson: Sure. I’m down. I’m about four blocks down, but I’ll turn around.
Me: No, just wait there. We’ll pick u up.
I duck into the car, feeling nervous, but giddy. The giddiness remains even when I look down at my scars. Maybe, just maybe, I’ll be able to conquer my fears and my past after all.
Chapter 9
Seth
“Luke, Luke, Luke,” I tsk him from across the booth. “Where the hell did you find that girl? On the street corner?”
Luke glances over his shoulder at the brunette that brought us here, who grins at him and slides her hands down her body, right there for everyone at the bar to see. “She’s not that bad, is she?” he asks, looking at me.