Chapter Twenty-Six
Not a Towel Throwing Type of Girl
My ass on Ren’s counter, Ren leaning against the counter kitty corner from me, I looked up from my plate and saw my man’s eyes on me.
They were probing.
“What?” I asked.
“You good?” he asked back.
“Yeah,” I answered, confused. “Why wouldn’t I be?”
“You got in last night at three. I kept you up a f*ckuva lot later. It’s not even seven, but you look fine and you got hardly any sleep.”
“You didn’t either,” I reminded him.
“Yeah,” he agreed. “And I’m draggin’.”
He didn’t look like he was dragging. He looked like Ren. Confident, even just standing there eating. And hot (of course).
“How do you do it?” he asked.
I shrugged and turned my attention to my eggs. “Live the rock star life, babe. Have for a while.” I forked up some eggs, chewed, swallowed, looked at him and grinned. “Sleep is overrated.”
He grinned back and took his plate to the sink. After I ate my final strawberry, he took mine and it joined his.
Then he got in position between my legs, arms around me, so I wrapped mine around him.
“What’s up for your day?” he queried.
“Go make coffee. Go over office furniture catalogues with Daisy. Try to make inroads with finding out what’s bugging Darius. Strip. Hit some tweaker houses with Hector and Tex to see if we can crack the case of the Highland burglaries. Come home to my man.” I tipped my head to the side. “You?”
“Power play day,” he stated strangely then asked, “Find out what’s bugging Darius?”
“Yeah. Something’s up with him. He’s got issues. I’m gonna sort them out,” I told him. “But what’s power play day?”
“Vito and I got into it yesterday.”
I felt my head jerk right before I fired questions at him. “What? Why? When? Why didn’t you tell me?”
“You had your stripping debut last night. I figured you had shit on your mind so I’m tellin’ you now,” he replied.
“Okay,” I gave that to him because it was sweet. “Then what? And why?”
He sighed and got closer to me.
“He’s pushin’ for a decision, that decision namely bein’ me changin’ my mind. He knows what’s goin’ down with you and me and he’s scramblin’ to get me further in the fold before what I got with you turns me irrevocably. His problem is that he isn’t realizin’ that that turn has already been made. We had words. Dom’s tryin’ to keep things smooth and I’ll give it to him, he’s tryin’, and I respect that. But Vito doesn’t respect Dom much and is makin’ that clearer and clearer by the day. Dom isn’t liking that. He’s towed the line for some time and Vito’s not cuttin’ him any slack. It’s a faulty play. But Dom now has a family, and Sissy and him are lookin’ at tryin’ to grow that family so I’m gettin’ the sense Dom’s rethinking things, same as me. Way Vito’s acting, he’s turnin’ Dom, too.”
Wow.
Interesting.
“So what does power play mean?” I asked.
He started to run his hand up and down my back and I worried this was soothingly, telling me to brace, but I would find with what he said next it was just affectionately, something I liked a whole lot better.
“I was gonna just walk away. Still not happy about him showin’ up at your parents, and that was part Vito, part him makin’ a statement to me about who’s the boss of this family. With that and him pushin’, if he doesn’t back off and let that happen, I’ll make this hard on him and everybody.”
“How?”
“Because I’m clean. Not squeaky, but I’m clean,” he explained. “And because of that, should something happen to him or Dom, they needed the legitimate holdings to be clean with the understanding that someone would take care of families. What that means is, we got an LLC but it’s not a partnership. I’m the only name on it. So the cops or Feds couldn’t seize our assets if someone went down.”
Wow again.
That was freaking smart. Then again, so was my man.
Ren kept going.
“This also means my name is on everything. Everything we own as well as the office lease. We got no board to answer to. The only thing tying me to Vito’s authority is respect. He plays the wrong game, instead of lettin’ all that go and walkin’ away, I take it all with me. Or, in this case, kick his ass out.”
Holy crap.
He was carrying all the chips!
I smiled huge. “Zano, that’s awesome.”
“He doesn’t think I’ll do it. He keeps pissin’ me off, I will. This is what I’m gonna tell him today.”
If Vito didn’t think Ren would do it, he was a fool, and that surprised me. Hell, Zach had barely got the chance to get in my face before Ren sorted that situation. My guess was that it was partially Vito, maybe a little of it in his genes, that made Ren not a man you messed with. Therefore, Vito should know better.
“I’m guessing this will be unpleasant,” I noted.
“Something’s gotta give,” Ren replied. “We’ve been back and forth for a while. I keep thinkin’ he’ll get his head outta his ass. It feels like he’s stallin’.” He smiled at me and dipped his face to mine. “But the rest of my life is where I want it.” His arms gave me a squeeze indicating (righteously) he was talking about me. “That’s the last piece to slot in. I’m impatient to get this shit done.”
I repositioned to circle his neck with my arms and offered, “You need to talk or anything, you know how to find me.”
“Yeah,” he said softy then pulled back an inch and announced, “Goin’ with you tonight to do that thing in the Highlands.”
I blinked. “What?”
“Goin’ with you tonight to do that thing with you in the Highlands,” he mostly repeated.
“Zano—”
His face got close again. “Baby, not gettin’ in your business. But after last night, wanna watch you do your thing.”
That feeling stole through me again because he didn’t sound like he was doing this to horn his way in to find a way to protect me, or alternately, find a reason to talk me out of doing it.
He sounded like he was genuinely interested in what I did.
And it had to be said, I was good at what I did, and after his reaction last night, where he gave me absolutely no shit in a situation where any alpha badass would lose his mind, but instead he got off on it, it seemed Ren was coming around.
Spectacularly.
“Right, then you’re going with us tonight,” I agreed.
He grinned, moved in and kissed me. It was sweet, but short (unfortunately).
He lifted his head and stated, “Find time between one thing and another to have dinner with your man.”
Bossy.
But since this was something I wanted too, I nodded.
He gave me a brush on the lips and moved away, saying, “Don’t worry about the dishes. I’ll rinse ‘em then deal with ‘em when I get home. We both gotta get goin’.”
Another order that I could accept so I nodded again and jumped off the counter.
Ren ran water over the dishes as I prepared travel mugs of coffee for us. We walked out together, Ren locking up after us.
His Jag was at the front of the house (it always was and the street was busy, meaning he might have parking voodoo, too). Mine was across the street and down some (which, without parking voodoo, was a better than average spot for me).
Being Ren, he walked me to my car. Another brush on the lips before he stood with his hand on the door while I folded in.
“Later, babe,” I said, my hand on the handle to pull the door closed, but he nor his hand moved. I looked up to him to see him looking down the street. “Zano?” I called.
“You know that guy?” he asked.
I twisted in my seat and looked out the side of my car. I saw nothing but a car driving away.
“What guy?” I asked back and looked up at him.
He was still gazing down the street then he looked down at me. “He got in his car and took off as you were gettin’ in yours. You get a look at him at all?”
“No,” I answered. “Who was he?”
“Seen him at your apartment building,” Ren said, and I felt the skin on the back of my neck prickle. “I’d come over. He’d hear me knock and look out. Four doors down from you.”
So that was why Ren was always staring down the hall.
I tried to think who lived four doors down from me and realized I didn’t know. I’d known a number of people in my building but who was behind that door wasn’t one of them.
“Just thought he was nosy,” Ren said and I refocused on him. “But that shit isn’t right.”
It wasn’t.
“I’ll call my landlord and see if he’ll give me details on who lives there,” I told Ren.
“Do that today,” Ren bossed me.
I fought an eye roll and murmured, “I’m on it.”
He leaned in, gave me another brush on the lips, pulled away and said quietly, “Later, honey.”
“Later,” I replied.
He slammed the door. I belted up, started her up and took off.
I did this looking in my rearview, watching Ren in his suit sauntering to his car.
And enjoying the view.
* * * * *
“Ralphie says no,” Sadie told us.
It was late morning at Fortnum’s and we were sitting in the seating area at the front of the store. Daisy was in with her furniture catalogues. Sadie was in to get coffees for her and Ralphie to take back to her gallery. But Sadie had been corralled into trolling the catalogues (of which all of them, and there were five, had dozens of plastic sticky tabs jutting out the sides).
She’d been sending photos of the furniture Daisy had narrowed it down to (with the word “narrowed” used loosely) to Ralphie.
And Ralphie had so far nixed all the photos.
“What’s wrong with that set?” Daisy asked. “It’s black. It’s class. And it fits in our budget.”
“I don’t know,” Sadie replied. “He just said no.”
“That’s the seventeenth no,” Daisy returned irritably.
“I know. I’m maxing out the memory on my phone,” Sadie shared.
Daisy stared at her phone then looked to Sadie. “You got a top of the line phone. How can seventeen photos max it out?”
“Because my guy is Hector Chavez. He’s the most handsome man I’ve ever seen. And we have a dog. Hector plays with Gretl and I take pictures of them. Loads of them.” She leaned in. “Loads.”
If Ren and I had a dog and his hot guy badass was out playing with her, I’d do the same thing.
That meant we so needed a dog.
But in the meantime, I would live vicariously.
So I demanded, “Chickie, let me see.”
Sadie shot a smile at me and leaned toward me while hitting her screen with her thumb, but it pinged as she did.
“Photo text from Ralphie,” she murmured, hit her screen again then turned her phone to Daisy and me. It had a picture of black office furniture on it that looked like it was a photo of a photo on a computer screen.
“That’s it!” Daisy cried.
I studied the photo. It looked like most of the seventeen other choices Ralphie poo-pooed.
Daisy snapped at Sadie with her fingers. “Tell him to order a catalogue from wherever that is.”
“Daisy, you know they probably have all the photos on the website. We just need the web address and we won’t have to wait on a catalogue,” I told her.
“If we don’t have a catalogue, we can’t put these sticky-tabby things on them,” she told me, pointing a long lethal nail at the tagged catalogues.
“That’s very true,” I replied. “But if you like that, Ralphie likes it, it fits in the budget, you could also order it, say, today, and have the freaking furniture on its way so you’re closer to sitting your ass behind a desk, rather than waiting for catalogues you can put sticky-tabby things in and delay your ass being behind an actual desk.”
“Good point,” she mumbled and looked at Sadie, “Tell him to send the web address.”
Sadie bent to her phone.
The bell over the door rang.
I looked to it to see Eddie coming in. His eyes were aimed to the espresso counter, and I knew he saw Jet when I saw his dimpled smile.
Then his eyes came to me and his smile fled. He lifted his hand and crooked a finger at me before he turned it toward the bookshelves and pointed there.
There was a time when Eddie Chavez crooking his finger at me would make my happy place spasm. Alas, your brother’s best friend was off-limits. Not to mention he had a thing for Indy before he lost his heart to Jet. So I had no shot.
Now, him crooking his finger at me and ordering me to the shelves in nonverbal badass I found annoying.
Still, he was championing my cause with Lee and Hank so I figured the least I could do was haul my ass to the shelves.
“Be back,” I muttered to the girls and hauled my ass to the shelves.
I didn’t know how deep into the bookshelves we needed to be for whatever Eddie had to say so I hedged my bets and stopped at the vinyl in the middle.
It appeared this was satisfactory because Eddie did no more pointing nor did he give me a chin lift or head jerk.
He stopped close to me.
“Bomb guys and police are done goin’ through what’s left of your apartment. They’ve released what they could find of your belongings that survived the blast. Hank wasn’t around so they gave it to me. It’s not much, two boxes, but I’ll drop it by Zano’s place.”
We had to be in the shelves for this?
I didn’t ask that.
I said, “Thanks, Eddie.”
I then wondered what survived the blast, and hoped it was my Firefly series DVD.
“Heard you’re gettin’ up in Darius’s shit,” he stated, and I focused on him to see his eyes were intent.
I was wrong. This was why we were in the shelves.
“Yes, Eddie, I am. And don’t give me any lip about it, all right? You guys need to give each other macho badass space? Fine. But I’m not a macho badass. I’m a girlie badass. And I’m getting into his space.”
Eddie made no reply. He just held up his hand, two fingers extended, and between them was a small piece of folded paper.
I took it, unfolded it and saw an address written on it.
“Anyone asks, you didn’t get that from me,” Eddie said firmly.
I looked up at him. “What is it?”
“You go there, you’ll know,” he replied mysteriously.
“Eddie, just tell me what it is,” I demanded.
“Like I said, chica, you go there, you’ll know.”
“Why the mystery?” I asked.
“Because I worked my ass off for f*ckin’ years to keep Darius in my life. He’s mi hermano. What we got, our history, he means a f*ckuva lot to me. And if he knows I gave you that, he’s a memory to me. I give you more, honest to God, no tellin’ what he’d do. So you take that. You go there. You’ll know why I gave it to you.”
He leaned into me and his voice dropped low.
“But I’m trustin’ you, Ally. You go cautious with what you do with what you find out. You f*ck this up, we got problems. Hear me?”
Holy crap!
What was at this address?
“You didn’t answer me,” Eddie prompted.
“Right, big badass cop, I’m standing right here so I heard you. And just to say, I’m tight with Darius too. We also have history. So you saying that shit to me means you don’t understand that what I’m trying to do is get him right. Not f*ck him up further and definitely not drive him away.”
Eddie held my eyes then leaned back, lips twitching as he murmured, “Jeez, you’ve always had balls, Ally.”
“No, I don’t. I’m a girl. What I’ve always been is a Rock Chick,” I retorted.
“Whatever, same thing” he muttered. “We’re done. Gonna go see my wife.”
Then without a good-bye (or even a chin lift), he was gone.
I looked down at the slip of paper in my hand.
Then I rearranged my afternoon.
* * * * *
I sat in my car, eyes on the house at the address Eddie gave to me.
It was a new build in Stapleton. Not big. Not small. Well-kept, but then again, in this ‘hood, the HOA Nazis wouldn’t let it be anything else.
It was late afternoon and I’d sorted what I needed to sort for my night’s activities. I’d also called my ex-landlord and got voicemail, but asked for a return call. I also left a voicemail to Brody because I didn’t think it was fair to let him keep obsessing about the Rock Chick books when the mystery was solved.
I just didn’t know exactly what to say to him to get him to stop or if I was going to let that cat out of the bag. And if I did, how to do it at the same time managing damage control.
Coming to no conclusions about any of that, and since nothing was happening on my stakeout and I was curious (okay, worried), I called Ren.
He answered with, “Hey, baby.”
“Hey back at cha,” I replied. “How’s your day?”
“If that’s non-invasive Ally Speak for how did things go with Vito, it went shit.”
Oh man.
“What happened?” I asked.
“He said if I try to pull our assets from under him, it means war.”
Holy shit!
“Oh my God, Ren,” I whispered.
“Babe, Vito… he’s got a bark and he’s got a bite. With me, he won’t bite. Me and Dom are the only sons he has and there’s no mistaking I’m a favorite. That said, it gets down to it, he’s also the only father I’ve had, and he knows that means something to me. He’s savin’ face. It’s bluster. He’ll think on this, give me shit, then he’ll back off and one of two things will happen. The Zanos will go legit, or we’ll go our separate ways. Either way, I’ll be the f*ck out.”
“Well, I hope you go legit because I like it that your offices are across from mine.”
This was true.
It also meant I would have many opportunities to get creative and f*ck up Dawn’s day.
Repeatedly.
I heard Ren’s soft laughter in my ear before he said, “Gotta say, honey, since I signed that lease, I’ve been thinking the same thing.”
“We could carpool to work,” I suggested and got more soft laughter.
Really.
Totally.
This together togetherness was super easy.
The door to the house I was watching opened and my back went straight.
The garages were in the back but I couldn’t stakeout back there without being seen. Therefore, I knew, unless I could find a vantage point to the garage not in my car, I would be lucky if I saw anything since coming and going activity would all happen at the back.
I was tenacious and this had to do with Darius, so I tried it anyway.
But now I was seeing something.
And I couldn’t f*cking believe my eyes.
A very handsome African American boy-man, maybe sixteen, was walking out of the house. He was tall, his hair cut close to his head, very well-muscled, and he had a basketball held loosely under his arm.
But it wasn’t just him that had my attention.
Coming out behind him but stopping on the front step was Malia Clark. She was wearing attractive business-style clothes, but her feet were bare like she’d kicked off her heels when she got home. Her thick, black, straightened hair was long and had soft curls at the ends but the front was tucked behind her ear in a casual sexy way that worked great with her oval face and big eyes.
She was smiling at the boy as he walked away and they were talking to each other. I knew this since her mouth was moving and he kept looking over his shoulder.
Malia Clark had been Darius’s girlfriend in high school. I hadn’t seen her since his father’s funeral.
She backed into the house and closed the door.
My eyes went to the boy and my heart thumped.
“Holy f*cking shit,” I whispered, completely forgetting I was on the phone with Ren.
“What?” he asked.
“Holy f*cking shit,” I repeated, staring at the kid.
“Ally, what? Are you okay?” Ren clipped in my ear.
“Zano,” I said quietly because I was too shocked to get my voice to go louder. “Right now, I’m staring at Darius Tucker’s teenage son.”
Silence.
Then, “Wherever you are, get the f*ck out of there, Ally. Now.”
An order. A firm one.
And a surprising one.
I tore my eyes away from Darius’s son, stared at the steering wheel and focused all my attention on the phone.
“Why?” I asked.
“Just do it.”
“Why, Ren?” I pushed.
“I got shit to do. Can’t get away. Come to the office.”
“Why, Ren?” I snapped.
“Baby, I’m askin’ you, just do it.”
I lifted my head and looked down the street. Well down it, Darius’s son was now jogging and dribbling the ball.
F*ck.
Shit.
F*ck.
“I’ll come to your office,” I told Ren.
“See you soon, honey.”
“Later,” I replied, disconnected and started up my car
I gave one more look to the fast disappearing boy-man and one last look at the front door to Malia Clark’s house.
Then I drove to Ren’s office.
* * * * *
“Hey, Ally,” Dawn greeted me with such sugar-sweet fakeness, my teeth hurt.
“Hey, Dawn,” I replied, otherwise ignoring her.
Instead, I was taking in the fact that Ren’s offices were sah-weet. Lots of dark wood. Lots of glass art. Just like Ren, total class.
I kept walking toward the inner hall when Dawn called, “Ren likes guests to be announced.”
“Don’t worry. He knows I’m coming,” I told her as I disappeared in the hall.
I turned into the opened door to my right and the minute I entered Ren’s office I saw him coming my way, nearly at the door.
“Thought I heard you,” he murmured, making it to me.
“I’m here,” I noted the obvious.
He leaned in to give me a distracted touch on the lips then moved beyond me to close the door.
Oh man.
Here we go.
I took that moment to look around his office to see it was more of the same from outside. The difference being that his desk was a mess.
My man worked. That was obvious.
I liked that.
What was better was that Indy had told me that Lee allowed Dawn to come into his office and keep his desk tidy.
Clearly, Ren did not allow the same thing.
This almost made me smile, but I didn’t do it when I felt Ren’s hand at my back and I looked up to see he looked distracted but serious.
He led us around his desk, then, with a hand in my belly, he gently pushed me so I sat on the papers on the top. He sat in his chair, turned it my way and looked up at me.
“What I’m gonna tell you, Ally, you do not ever repeat.”
That was not a good start.
“Zano, you’re freaking me out,” I whispered.
“Good. Then you’ll take me seriously.”
Oh my God.
I braced, and it was good thing.
A very good thing.
“In my world, everybody knows everything they can know. You know it so you know how others operate. That way you can make educated guesses at their plays. You also know it so you know what’s important.” He paused and his eyes grew even more intense. “And what lines not to cross.”
“Oh God.” I was still whispering.
This wasn’t getting any better.
He went on.
“Seven years ago, Shirleen and Tucker had a falling out with one of their crew. A smartass, he had more confidence than brains. He also had a big mouth. When they got shot of him, he had big words to say pretty much everywhere about how he was gonna make them pay and take over their business. Fortunately, he didn’t share widely about exactly how he was gonna do that, and what I mean by that was his chosen tool at how to exact vengeance. Unfortunately for him, he was the kind of man who would carry through with his plans.
He stopped talking. I nodded, and he kept going.
“Tucker never did their wet work.”
My stomach roiled at these words used in conjunction with Darius. But I fought back any response, including keeping my expression blank.
“He’d order it, as would Shirleen, but neither of them would do it. Both of them could be cold-blooded. They had to be to get where they were and stay there. They did other things to inspire loyalty. But to make a point with this guy, Tucker stepped in.”
“Zano.” It came out as a soft plea.
“Liam Edward Clark is off-limits, baby.”
I closed my eyes.
Liam Edward.
Lee and Eddie.
Oh my God.
Ren kept talking and I opened my eyes.
“This guy was gonna make his play usin’ this kid. How, I don’t know. But he also had a point to make, so I could guess. Tucker made sure he didn’t do that. And he made sure how he did it that no one would get that same idea. And no one has. Not again. Although it is not known widely what Malia and Liam mean to Tucker, it’s known by those who do know, no matter if Shirleen and Tucker are no longer in the game, you do not get near this kid. You do not get near his mother.”
“So, Darius takes care of them,” I guessed.
He nodded. “Yeah. They have his protection. Other than that, he gives them money and they don’t know where it comes from. The reason they don’t is because every month, Lee Nightingale and Eddie Chavez take turns bringing her an envelope, sayin’ that shit is from them. But it isn’t. It’s from Tucker. As for Tucker, he has nothing to do with them.”
My back went straight. “What? Why?”
“That, I don’t know. What I do know is that for everybody, including you, they don’t exist.”
“That’s ridiculous,” I snapped.
“It’s what it is. You do not get near them, Ally.”
“But the reason I would—”
He cut me off to ask sharply, “You care about your friend?”
I clamped my mouth shut and nodded.
“Then they do not exist. You do not tell Indy. You do not share with the Rock Chicks. F*ck, don’t even tell Tex or Duke.”
“I don’t understand this,” I admitted, because I f*cking well didn’t.
“Then ask yourself why Dominic Vincetti was entirely okay with being an a*shole who dipped his wick into everything that moved and did whatever Vito told him to do until he discovered someone had hit his wife. Then he and Sissy had a kid. Now he’s lookin’ for ways to get out. Being in love does shit to you, Ally. I know that as a goddamn fact. I’m not one but I can guess, being a father does shit, too. And it did it to Tucker.”
“I’d understand that if Darius was part of their lives,” I returned.
“The kid’s sixteen,” Ren told me.
“And?” I prompted.
“Count back the years, baby,” he said gently.
I did.
But Ren did the math for me. “She was pregnant at the funeral, Ally.”
“So?”
“What do you know about Malia Clark?” he asked instead of answering.
“I know she was a cheerleader. I know she was gorgeous and still is. I know she went with Indy and me and a bunch of our friends to a Prince concert that Indy got front row seats to. And I know that Malia almost passed out with glee when The Purple One did a twirl, his sweat flew off and it hit Malia. I also know before Darius’s dad was murdered, he and Malia were tight. And now I know she was knocked up at his dad’s funeral, which was why she dropped out of sight her senior year and I haven’t seen her since.”
“And what was Darius doin’ his senior year?”
I didn’t answer that. This was because, instead of being on the football field as he had been the three years previously, he was under the bleachers, dealing dope for his uncle.
Ren let my silence be my response and went on.
“Well, I know she was a court reporter who studied at night to become a paralegal, which is what she now does. I also know that Liam Clark has already signed a pre-commitment to a college. This has part to do with the way he can run a ball on a football field. But mostly it has to do with the fact that he’s hitting his junior year in high school next year, he’s already taking almost a complete schedule of AP classes and the college he’s committed to is Harvard.”
Whoa.
“No shit?” I breathed.
“Darius Tucker is no fool. He’s also f*ckin’ sharp. Malia Clark isn’t one either, and she’s a hard worker. And the kid they made didn’t fall far from the tree.”
This was cutting me deep already.
Knowing all this, it was killing me.
I leaned into Ren and said, “Then he’s gotta know his kid. He’s got to show him where he got some of how awesome he is. He’s got—”
“Do you honestly believe Tucker thinks he gave anything good to that boy?” Ren asked.
I sat back and snapped, “Well, he did.”
“You know that, baby, and so do I. But Tucker doesn’t.”
“Zano—”
“How would you feel, you’re set to go to Harvard, your life laid out beautifully, and your ex-drug dealer dad shows up and f*cks with your head?” he asked.
“I don’t know. Probably about the same way Darius, who had much the same scholarship to Yale for exactly the same reasons, his life laid out beautifully, felt when his dad was murdered,” I shot back. “Difference is, his dad was dead and couldn’t show him the way to get rid of his anger in a healthy way. Darius is not dead.”
“Do you think he has the tools to give that to his son?”
“What I think is, neither of them will know if they don’t try.”
“Ally—”
But it was safe to say I’d had enough.
“This is f*cked up bullshit,” I hissed.
“Baby—”
I jumped off the desk and stated (loudly), “If he’d let us in, he’d know we’d have his back. His kid doesn’t need to know any of that shit. And we’d be there to prove how great Darius is. Anyone knows the people around you that give their hearts to you shows to the world the person you are. He’s got tons of friends who love him, which means he’s not only making Liam live without his father, he’s making all of us live without Liam. And, Ren, that is not on.”
Ren stood and put his hands to either side of my neck, dipping his face close to mine.
“You need to tread cautiously with this, and by that I mean leave it alone,” he advised.
“Why? Do you think Darius would whack me?” I snapped sarcastically.
“No. What I think is that you love him and you’ll have difficulty living without him in your life. And more, you’ll have difficulty explaining to Shirleen, your brother and Chavez why Darius got shot of the lot of you because you stuck your nose in.”
F*ck!
He was right.
And I suspected Darius would do that. This was why Lee and Eddie hadn’t already stepped in. Maybe they’d tried and got their hands burned. So they learned.
“Goddamn it,” I bit out.
He knew I was stymied and that was why he pulled slightly away and some of his intensity left him. But, in an effort to make me feel better, he stroked my throat with his thumb which, even frustrated as all get out, kind of worked.
Then he asked, “How’d you learn this shit?”
“An anonymous source, namely Eddie Chavez. And if you share that with anybody, I’m telling Smithie to ban you from entry so you can’t watch me strip again.”
His lips quirked, but his eyes went reflective.
So I asked, “What?”
“Surprised Chavez shared that with you.”
“He’s as stymied as I am. Probably wants to do something about it, can’t, so he’s heard I’m all over Darius’s ass and, obviously, is willing to throw me under the bus.”
“Hmm,” Ren mumbled.
“Hmm, what?” I asked.
“Hmm, if I tell you what that means, you’ll get ideas so I’ll keep the what of my hmm to myself.”
I narrowed my eyes. “Do you honestly think that’s gonna work?”
He studied me. Then he slid his hands from my neck so he could wrap his arms around me loosely.
I returned the favor and waited (but not patiently).
When he didn’t say anything, I said a warning, “Zano.”
He pulled me closer and asked bizarrely, “Have you heard the song Hold on Loosely?”
Had he temporarily lost his sanity?
I was a Rock Chick.
Of course I’d heard it.
“Hello?” I called unnecessarily. “I’m Ally Nightingale.”
He took my meaning therefore stated, “So you know the words.”
I rolled my eyes, rolled them back and said shortly, “Yes. Now can we get back—?”
“I heard that song this morning on the way to work and realized that’s how I gotta deal with you.”
I snapped my mouth shut.
Then I stopped being peeved.
Because he was so right.
And that was sweet.
“So I’m gonna tell you what that hmm means. But first, I’m gonna say that what Tucker’s givin’ you is all he thinks he has to give. I’m sensing that isn’t enough for you. And before you do shit, you need to ask yourself if what he has to give is enough, because what you have to lose with him is everything. You also have to understand that what’s at stake for you is at stake for everybody in your posse. You have to make that decision for everybody. All or nothing, or accept him as he comes. And that’s a huge decision to make, baby.”
“I get you,” I said softly.
He studied me a moment, obviously took in that I processed what he said, then he again spoke.
“My hmm meant that Chavez would not share shit with you if he didn’t trust you to use it wisely. He has faith in you to handle this situation. He’s not throwing you under the bus. You’re his partner in a tag team and he just tagged you in. But he’s expecting you to enter the ring and kick ass. Not let the team down. Now you gotta decide if you go through those ropes, honey, or throw in the towel.”
“I’m not a towel throwing type of girl, Ren,” I shared honestly, and his arms got tighter.
“I know. Still. Think about it.”
I nodded.
“Good,” he murmured. Then louder, “I got to clear some shit, it’ll take me about half an hour. You good to wait? Then we’ll go out to dinner.”
“I’m good to wait,” I told him.
“That waiting would be in here with me. Not out in reception, givin’ Dawn shit, knowin’ she can’t retaliate.”
Well, there went my plans for the next half hour.
“I wouldn’t do that,” I totally lied.
“You so f*ckin’ would.” He knew I was lying.
I rolled my eyes, but it was all for show.
Ren knew this because on the downward roll, he was kissing me.
After kissing me, he got to work.
I inspected his office.
But I did it thinking on how I could get Darius back with his family.
Without the one he already had losing him.