If they had lied and told Madoc that I complained, then that meant he thought I wanted to leave. He thought that I went to our parents asking to be sent away.
I sucked the water off my bottom lip and opened my eyes, meeting Madoc’s scowl.
Madoc had never wanted me gone. He thought that I ran from him.
That was unexpected.
But it didn’t have to change things. If our parents lied to both of us, then I was still putting them under the knife. Maybe Madoc wasn’t as malicious as I had originally thought, but he still wasn’t innocent. He still treated me like a whore, and he never came for me. Never called, wrote, or looked for me. Everything I went through, I went through alone.
They were all still enemies.
“Get out of my way.” I brushed past him, climbing back up the incline.
But before I reached the car, Madoc grabbed the inside of my elbow and whipped me back around. “No, no. You don’t get to leave until I get an explanation.”
I looked up at him, feeling the heat of his skin through my wet shirt.
“An explanation?” I shrugged. “I’m guessing it’s genetic, Madoc. Penis size is inherited. Not much you can do about it.”
I spun back around, heading to the GTO and my jaw aching with a smile I struggled to hold back.
Opening the car door, I jerked backward as it was slammed shut again by a force behind me.
Shit!
My heart pounded, and my veins rushed with liquid heat.
Before I could turn around, Madoc crowded my back, pressing my chest into the car door.
Air rushed in and out of my lungs, and I felt warm all the way up to my head.
“Tell me you hated it,” he challenged, lips brushing hot on my ear. “I want to hear you say it.”
He kisses me. His mouth is wet and all over me. I can smell cigarettes everywhere now. From where his mouth and hands were. His fingers glide down my butt and squeeze.
“You ready to go upstairs?” he asks. “I want to see how bad you really are.”
I shake my head. No. “I want to go back outside to the party.”
Why did I let him kiss me?
I dart to his left, but he shoves his body into mine, cutting me off.
“But you got me all turned on. Come on, let’s go have some fun.” He reaches up and runs a thumb over my nipple.
My eyes widen, and my fists clench, about to hit him.
“Get away from her.” I hear Madoc’s voice from behind the guy looming over me.
“Get your own, Madoc.”
“That’s my sister.” His voice is sharp. “Get away from her or get out of my house, Nate.”
Nate backs off of me. “Fine. Didn’t know she was your sister, man. Sorry.”
He leaves, but I still feel ashamed.
“Madoc, I—”
“Shut up,” he barks, grabbing my hand. “I knew you’d show up here, trying to be the center of attention as usual. Looking for a good time just like your mother, right?”
“That’s not what I was doing, asshole.” I try to pull my hand away as he hauls me up the stairs.
“Oh, really? You have friends here? Yeah, didn’t think so.” We stop at my door. He lets go. “Go back to your room, Fallon. Play with your Legos.”
“You’re not the boss of me, Madoc. And I’m not a slut.” I put my hands on my hips. “But if you’re going to keep calling me one, then I may as well get it over with. Your friend Jared’s outside, right? He’s hot. Maybe he’ll be my first.”
I walk around Madoc and go for the stairs again. He grabs me and pulls me through my bedroom door.
“Madoc, let go of me!”
“Stay away from my friends!” He lets go but bears down on me, crowding my space. He’s so angry, but I’m not scared.
“Oh, like I’d really beg to be a part of your crowd.” I sneer. “A bunch of Kens and Barbies that get their reliable world news from Facebook.”
He advances. I’m backed up to my bumper sticker wall.
“You act like you’re so superior,” he snarls, “but who was it macking on one of my friends downstairs? For someone that doesn’t care about those people, you seemed pretty ready to open your legs for one of them!”
I get back in his face. “I do what I want, when I want. No one makes decisions for me, Madoc. Not you. Not our parents. Not my friends. I’m in control. I’m free!”
“Free?” he laughs bitterly. “Are you serious? Just because you have shit pierced to your face and a few tattoos? You didn’t get those tattoos because you wanted them. You got them to prove that you could. It’s you trying to prove something, Fallon! You’re. Not. Free!”
I slap him hard with both of my hands, but he catches me before I can hit him a third time. He holds my wrists, and we stare at each other. Something passes through his eyes, and before I know it, his lips are on mine.
We both grab at each other. He pulls me hard against him, and his mouth is all over mine. This isn’t like when Nate kissed me downstairs. Madoc feels real. Like nothing is planned. Everything is coming from his gut.
This feels right.
He pulls away, breathing hard, wide-eyed.
“Oh, my God.” His eyebrows are pinched together in fear. “I’m sorry, Fallon. I don’t know what I was thinking. I didn’t mean—”
I inch back up to him, unable to meet his eyes. “Don’t stop,” I beg. Slowly, I reach out with my shaking hand and take him around his neck, bringing him in.
He jerks when my lips meet his, but after a few seconds, his arms circle my waist.
“I like fighting with you,” he chokes out, laying me on the bed and coming down on top. “This is going to change everything.”
I pull his T-shirt over his head. “This changes nothing,” I say.
“Say it, Fallon.” He pushed into me, his lips in my hair. “Tell me how much you hated my hands on you . . . my mouth on you.”
I splayed my palms against the door, remembering how my hands had been on every inch of him.
Madoc became my world two years ago. I’d wait for him at night, my heart pumping a mile a minute, knowing that he was coming. Knowing that he was going to touch me. I loved all of it. I never wanted the sun to come up.
I pushed back against his long body, the wet heat between my legs nearly making me groan.
I could barely catch my breath as I twisted my face to the side. “You want to hear how much I wanted it?” My throat tightened on the words.
He laid his palms over my hands against the door and pressed into me harder from behind.
His lips were on my neck. “Fuck the past,” he breathed. “I want to hear that you missed it.”