Mitchell walked proudly into the clearing. “Shearjashub, Hephzibah, this is our new home.”
I looked around. It was a huge improvement from the fire swamp. But it was also so remote, so very far from everything, that it made me feel even more isolated from the world.
“We will be safe here if we are only careful,” Mitchell said. Then he stopped and looked at Barzee. “But we’re going to have to act more wisely. Which means you aren’t going to be able to leave the camp anymore. You’re going to have to stay up here with Shearjashub until we are ready to move on.”
Barzee scowled. I expected her to argue, but she didn’t say anything. That’s just the way it was now. Mitchell had essentially made prisoners of us both.
We hiked back to the lower camp, then spent all day packing up our gear, taking down our tents, and getting everything ready to move up to the new camp. Once it was dark, we started hauling things up to the top of the mountain. If I thought it was hard to climb the mountain in the daylight, it was nothing compared to hiking it at night with a good part of our gear slung over my shoulders and my bedding in my arms. I was terrified that I might fall. If I had, I didn’t think I’d have the energy to stand up again.
We finally stumbled into our new camp. Mitchell made us help him construct a new tunnel tent, and the moment it was finished I crawled inside and immediately fell asleep.
I only slept a few hours. When I woke up, the sun was a quarter way up in the sky.
Mitchell figured it was a great time to do some exploring, so we spent the morning hiking around, checking out our new surroundings. At one point we came upon a tight crevice underneath a huge boulder that formed a sliver of a cave. Mitchell told me to slither underneath and see what was inside.
I lay down on my stomach and crawled into the narrow cave. I must be the first human who has ever been underneath this rock, I thought. Crawling a bit farther, I discovered I was wrong. A pair of old boots, a man’s belt, and an old magazine were there. I wondered what would cause a man to take off his boots and belt. Then I picked up the magazine. Glancing at the cover, I let out a quick grasp and dropped it as if it were a spider.
After all that I had been through, I didn’t think there was anything that could shock me anymore. But this was different. It was horrible. Mitchell had shown me pornography before, but he hadn’t shown me anything like this. The horrible image was seared into my mind.
Hearing me gasp, Mitchell slithered into the crevice and maneuvered to my side. He snatched up the magazine and began greedily looking at the pictures. Then he stopped and stared at me. “We have made the right decision. This place has been sanctified of the Lord. The Lord has seen fit to bless His servant with this sign.” He then inched a little closer. “Shearjashub, it’s clear that your descent below all things is not complete. Who do you think you are to shrink from your brothers and sisters in this magazine? Do you think you are better than they are? Do you think you are more holy? More worthy of God’s great love? It is clear that I must instruct you. When we get back to camp, I will.”
I shook my head in dread. His instructions were always painful lessons. My heart sank in fear.
When we got back to our tents, he took the pornographic magazine and shoved it in my face. “Look at this!” he screamed.
I tried to fight him. I tried to close my eyes. But Mitchell grabbed my chin and turned my face toward the magazine. “Open your eyes or you’ll regret it!” he sneered. “These people are more righteous than you are. They are more righteous than the rest of the world.” He turned the pages, making me look at everything. “These people are showing more courage than you have ever shown. They aren’t afraid of showing their true spiritual state.”
I tried to look away, but he wouldn’t let me. And it didn’t matter. The images were already burned into my brain. I could never forget them. I felt as if my mind was scarred.
Then something caught his attention and he pulled the magazine away from me and started looking through it by himself. The images were a bright flame in the darkness and he was a mindless moth. It only took a couple seconds before he was completely engrossed. “My, my, look at this…” He started describing what he was looking at. He was graphic and detailed. Hearing the things that he was saying made me absolutely sick. I was so embarrassed. So shocked. I felt so slimy and scared.
He became so absorbed in the pornography that I think he forgot that I was even there. When he got to the last page, he looked up with his greedy, evil eyes. Then he stood up and walked toward me. The pornography had lit a violent flame inside him. And so he raped me.
And that was my first day in my new home.
33.
Hunger