“This is my daughter,” Mitchell answered. “I can’t allow you to do that. It is strictly forbidden by our religion. It would be against everything that we believe in.”
The officer was silent as he thought. I felt his eyes boring into me. Though I kept my eyes down, my ears were fixed on every word he said.
“She is pure now,” Mitchell went on. “She is innocent. That is important. Please, I know this must be new to you, but you must try to understand.” I quickly glanced toward Mitchell. He was looking straight into the officer’s eyes. His voice was calm. Tranquil. Pleasant. He was pleading in great humility. He was gracious to the core.
The officer seemed to be perplexed. “Could I convert to your religion just long enough to see her face?”
“No. It is impossible.”
“We’ve had reports that she might be someone we are looking for.”
“I assure you, sir, she is my daughter. I love her very much. I only want to protect her. I only want to keep her safe and pure.”
Barzee kept her vise grip upon my thigh, her fingers biting into my flesh. I kept my eyes down, praying the officer would come and rescue me from the hell I had been living every day.
“Let me ask again. I could convert to your religion. All I want to do is to see her face.”
I could hear Mitchell move toward me as if he was trying to protect me. “Even if you could convert, that wouldn’t be enough. Only her family and her husband will ever see her face. And our religion is not something you can convert to in an hour. Our faith takes a lifelong conversion. Every day we are trying to do better, trying to be more humble and obedient. I am sorry, but your request is impossible.”
“You have to understand. We are looking for someone—”
“But officer, if she were the person you were looking for, why would she just sit there?”
The officer paused. It was an impossible question to answer.
I was screaming in my mind: Because I am completely overwhelmed with fear! Because I have to protect my family! Because I am nothing but an empty shell who can do nothing but what they tell me to!
Later, there were times when I was angry with myself for succumbing to that fear. But those with shattered souls find it very difficult to speak.
They talked for maybe fifteen minutes. To me, it seemed like fifteen years. The detective asked a few more questions about who we were and what we believed in. Mitchell answered without any hesitation. He was a wonderful missionary to his own religion when he wanted to be. If he was hiding something, he certainly didn’t show it. He was open and sincere and appeared to be without guile. I couldn’t believe it! This was the man who raped me every day! The man who stole me from my bedroom. The man who constantly threatened to kill my family. He was as evil and coldhearted as any man in the world. Now he appeared to be as harmless as a puppy, a simple man who was trying to live his religion in a threatening and judgmental world.
Eventually, the officer ran out of questions. He hesitated a long moment. It seemed he was unsure. Then he turned around and walked away, leaving me with the two monsters who had ripped my life apart.
As I watched him go down the stairs, every ray of hope that I had ever felt was instantly wiped away. Every ray of hope that I had for my future was swallowed up by an opaque blackness. I couldn’t move. I felt I couldn’t breathe. I felt as if every last shred of light had been sucked from my world.
Mitchell stuffed the map of San Diego into one of his terrible green bags, placed the other maps back on the shelf, then rushed us from the library, holding me with a steel grip.
If the officer had stayed around to watch us leave the building, he would have known. If he had seen the way Mitchell jerked me along, treating me like a slave and not a daughter, it would have been obvious. But he was gone. I was alone.
We walked back to camp without stopping to rest. All the way, Mitchell never stopped talking, his voice oozing with pride. “The Lord surely has protected me,” he said. “He utterly blinded that officer’s eyes.”
I kept my mouth shut and kept on walking.
“This thin veil was all it took to hide my Esther.” He laughed, flicking the veil before my face. “I am so smart. I am so clever. I told the officer that your husband is the only man who will ever see your face. But the funny thing is, it was your husband who told him that.”