Chapter Twenty-Two
THE NEXT TIME I OPEN my eyes it’s Andie at the side of my bed in a chair and it’s just the two of us in the room.
“Where’s the baby?” I ask, my voice raspy and not very attractive. I sound like I’ve been smoking three packs a day for the last thirty years. I have no idea what time it is or even if we’re in the same day as I was when I arrived.
“She’s with her daddy one floor above you. How are you feeling?”
“Good. Great.” I try to sit up but the pounding in my head makes it slow going. “Damn headache.”
“You have a slight concussion. Maybe you should stay down.” She puts her hand on my arm and her expression is pure concern.
“No, thanks. I need to get out of here. My co-pay is outrageous.”
“Don’t worry about the co-pay. Just get better.” Andie sits back in her chair and rubs her belly. She still looks pretty pregnant but no way in the world will I tell her that.
“How’s Sarah?” I ask, directing the conversation away from myself. I know once Andie realizes I’m okay, she’ll start scolding me for having that gun. Better to divert her attention before she becomes fixated on things I’d rather not discuss.
“She’s perfect. We’re going home later today. Maybe we can all ride together. They said you don’t need to stay another night. You just have to rest.”
“Do I get to ride in the back with her?” I like the idea of making googly eyes at her for the thirty minutes it’ll take to get back to the ranch. I need her to memorize my face before I leave so when I call her on the phone she’ll know who’s talking.
“If you want.” Andie stares at me and then leans in closer, lowering her voice. “So what’s going on with you and Ian?”
I look around the room, making sure he’s not hiding in any corners. “What do you mean?”
“I mean, I’m gone for a day and suddenly you guys are out getting into all kinds of trouble.”
Something tells me the best plan of action here is to play the drama down as much as possible. I don’t want Ian getting into trouble. He didn’t do anything wrong. “I was just taking a ride in the truck while he was checking cows. It was no big deal.”
“That’s not the way we heard it.” She frowns at me. “You know he’s got a wild streak.”
It makes me cranky just hearing her say that. “He wasn’t doing anything wrong.”
“Then what are you doing here in the hospital with stitches and a concussion?”
I struggle to sit up. I’m too angry to remain lying down for this conversation. “It’s a slight concussion, not a full-on one. Besides, that has nothing to do with him, okay? He was perfectly nice. A perfect gentleman.” I pause so she can see how serious I am. She just doesn’t understand him like I do, apparently, which is pretty sad since she sees him every stinking day. “Have you ever checked cows before?”
She smiles vaguely. “A couple times. With Mack.”
“Okay, then. So you know that you can sometimes have shit happen and you just need to deal with it.”
“So what happened?”
“Didn’t Ian tell you?”
“No. He got mad at Mack and Angus and stormed off before they got the whole story from him.”
“Probably because you guys were accusing him of something he didn’t do.” I try to cross my arms over my chest but the IV in my arm gets in the way. I stare down at it, and it reminds me of a leash. “Someone needs to get this junk off me so I can leave.”
“Where are you going?”
“I have to go find Ian, of course.”
“Why?”
“Because!” Now that I think about it for a split second, I realize I don’t have any reason to go find him. But I do have a reason for getting back to his house soon. Poor little Candy. What if she’s starving? She needs me! “I have responsibilities back at the ranch.”
Andie laughs.
“That’s not funny. I’m serious.” I lift my chin a little. It just so happens I have a newborn to take care of, not that it’s any of her business. Or maybe it is, but now I’m too mad to tell her about it.
“Okay, I’ll bite. What are your responsibilities? Are you in charge of wardrobe selection?”
“No.” Her statement makes zero sense. I’m staring at her like she’s stupid.
“Do you need to do someone’s hair?”
“No. Why are you saying that?” I’m pretty sure she’s mocking me right now, but that’s not something that Andie would ever do before. It makes my chest hurt to think she’s doing it now.
She shrugs. “I’m just trying to figure out what you could possibly need to do back home, that’s all.”
I feel like crying. “For your information, I’m needed for a lot of things, not just color-matching and hair.” Now I am, anyway. Thanks to Ian. My heart fills with warmth just thinking about what he did for me today. He made me a cow momma.
Andie’s face falls. “I didn’t mean it like that.”
“Yes, you did. You meant it exactly like that.” I press the red button on a wire looped around the edge of my bed.
“What are you doing?” she asks as I swing my legs over to the opposite side of the bed and move to the edge of it.
“I’m leaving.”
“What do you mean, you’re leaving?”
“Where’s my phone?” I ask, looking around.
“In a plastic bag in your top drawer over there.” She points to the side table next to my left leg.
I stand and get into the drawer, finding my phone. When I turn it on, I’m relieved to find that it still has a charge. I send off a quick text.
“Who are you calling?” Andie asks.
“I’m not calling anyone. I’m texting.” My clothes are in the bag too, but I can’t very well wear the jeans. They smell rancid. I keep them in the bag with the rest of the stuff, and send another text.
“Who are you texting?”
Before I can decide how to answer her, I get a response.
Be there in a few. I’m in town. What size are you?
I text him back the details and then sit on the bed, looking over my shoulder at Andie. “Do you have a brush?” I ask.
“Sure.” She pulls one out of her purse and hands it to me. “What’s going on?”
I take my time brushing my hair, not saying anything. I need to figure out how I’m going to handle this situation without making Andie freak out. She has the baby to think of and I don’t need her worrying about me. I can handle this, no problem.
The nurse comes in as I’m stalling for time. She’s not the same one who was taking care of Andie but she has the same expression on her face. Why do all nurses act like they hate me?
“Did you need something?” she says, her mouth all twisted up and wrinkly when she’s done talking and waiting for my answer.
I hold up my arm so she can see the IV needle. “Yes. I need you to take this out.”
“I’m sorry, but I can’t do that right now.”
I give her a tight smile. “Either you do it or I will.”
She glares at me. “The doctor is the one who gives the orders around here, missy, and he says you need the fluids and the meds.” She looks up at the clear bag hanging above me. “When that’s done, we’ll come back and take a look.”
“Wrong-o, Nurse Ratched.” I pull at the tape on my arm, wincing when it yanks a few of my fuzzy armhairs out. “I say I’m done, so I’m done. My body, my decision.”
Andie stands and leans over, putting her hand on my shoulder. “Sweetie, maybe you should wait.”
I shrug her off. “Nope. I’m not waiting. I have to get my hair brushed out and my face fixed before Ian gets here. I can’t do that hooked up to this contraption.”
The nurse walks over and tries to get in my way. “You need to wait.”
I pause and glare at her. “You so much as touch me, and you will be one sorry mofo.” I want to tell her that I wrestle with mountain lions and win, but I keep it to myself. It probably won’t help to convince anyone I’m ready to be discharged.
The nurse stops trying to touch my arm. “Are you threatening me?” she ask. “Because I can call for security.”
“Oh, it’s not a threat, I’m making you a promise. Touch me and you will feel the pain, guaranteed.” I stop messing with the tape and stare her down. “You can’t keep me here and you can’t force treatment on me. I know my rights. So either you help me get out of this, or you get the hell out of my room. That’s your choice, take it or leave it.”
See, what’s happening here, I think, is that I fought off a mountain lion and lived to tell about it. I am badassery personified. On top of that, everyone thinks the stuff that went down was Ian’s fault, which is totally not fair. I mean, maybe it was kind of his fault, but not in a bad way.
The things that happened to me today were awesome in an I-faced-death-and-kicked-its-ass kind of way, and I have Ian to thank for that, not to mention the bond with Candy. I feel like I need to tell him right now how grateful I am before anyone else gets near him and fills his head with nonsense that makes him feel bad. Today I was the best version of myself - strong, brave, resourceful. I never would have met that me without Ian there to bring her out.
“I’m going to call for security,” the nurse says, leaving us in the room.
“Go ahead!” I yell after her. “Tattletale!”
“Candice, I’m really worried about you,” Andie says, coming around the bed. “Seriously, would you please just calm down and leave that alone?”
“Hand me some paper towels,” I say, ignoring her. I have all the tape off and just the needle to get out. I’m afraid this sucker is going to bleed. The needle looks really thick.
I lean down and look at it closer. What is that, a frigging garden hose they put in my arm? Probably that rude nurse picked the biggest one they have because she’s jealous of my hair. Wench.
“Here.” Andie hands me a wad of towels from the bathroom and one gauze pad she found somewhere and pulled out of its wrapping.
I push the whole pile of it against my arm, using my stomach to press on it as I slide the needle out with my free hand. And damn, does it burn like … ooooh … Fire! My arm is on fire! Gah!
I drop the needle on the floor and do a little jig to try and ease the pain. Andie waits patiently as I do the cha-cha, the one-woman abbreviated tango, and a short waltz. It does wonders for the pain.
As I hold my arm up and put direct pressure against the garden hose hole with my opposite hand, I smile at Andie. And I keep on grinning, right through the fire burning up my arm and the nausea that threatens to overtake me. I swallow, fighting back against the bile that keeps trying to come up. “See? No big deal.”
“You are insane,” she says, almost smiling. “What’s gotten into you?”
“Nothing.” I shrug as I lean against the side of the bed, totally casual and in control — or so I want her to think because I don’t want her trying to force me to stay here without Ian. “I’m just done with being here, and I don’t like it when people don’t listen to me.”
“Sweetie … you were attacked by a cougar. You have stitches in your arm and a big lump on your head.” She looks at the bandage on my bicep. “You need to be careful or you could get an infection. Those cat nails are very dirty.”
“So? I’ll take antibiotics.”
Andie looks up at the bag. “That’s what you were doing before you pulled that thing out.”
I look up at the bag and then at the needle that’s dripping liquid on the floor near my foot. “Oh.” My arm burns even more just seeing all that germ killer going to waste.
Andie sighs. “I’m sure we can get you some pills. I just want you to stop and take a breath and tell me what’s going on.” She shakes her head. “Ever since you met Ian, it seems like you’ve gone off the rails.”
We both stop speaking for a while. The silence stretches to the point that it’s becoming awkward. I have to say something.
“Ian has nothing to do with it.”
She stares me down until I cave.
“Okay, maybe indirectly he has something to do with it. Very indirectly.”
“Tell me.” She sits on the edge of the bed next to me.
It takes me a while to explain to her what’s going through my mind and my heart. It doesn’t make a whole lot of sense, the way I feel like killing her brother-in-law one second and humping his leg the next. How do I put that into words that don’t make me sound nuts?
“I don’t know. He just … he gets me all riled up. And he makes me laugh. He challenges me. I do things with him that I’ve never done before. I like it. I like this new me that I am with him.”
“Oh.” She says softly.
And then even more softly she says. “Oh my.”
Fear trickles into my brain and my heart. Then the idea that I should be offended. “Oh my? What does that mean?”
“Nothing.”
“Don’t lie. You meant something with that oh my. What were you thinking? Because if it’s something bad about Ian, I’m going to be mad at you.”
“No, no, nothing bad. Well …” she pauses “…nothing too bad.”
I jab her in the rib with my healthy elbow. “Out with it.”
She goes all serious and stern on me. “Have you slept with him yet?”
My jaw drops open with the suddenness of her approach. I lean back on the bed next to her. “Wha …?”
“Don’t play innocent with me. I’ve known you for way too long to fall for that.”
“I’ll have you know that I am an Ian-virgin, okay? Geez. I just met the guy.” I’m glad she can’t read my mind, otherwise she’d know that I’m fully prepared to sleep with him the very next time I lay eyes on his gorgeous self.
“Maybe you shouldn’t. Sleep with him, I mean.”
I look at her, trying to read her mind through her eyes. All I see there is sadness. “Why not?”
“Because. It could go bad.”
“What could go bad?” I shake my head at her. “You’re talking in riddles, Andie, and I have to tell you … it’s annoying as hell. I’m injured if you haven’t noticed.” I hold up my arm for confirmation. “And I have a headache. Just say whatever it is you need to say and be done with it.”
She stares at the floor for a really long time. I’m starting to think she’s fallen into a trance when she finally lifts her head up and speaks.
“I can tell you like him. I mean, really like him. But sweetie, Ian’s not into commitment. If you sleep with him, it’s a guaranteed broken heart for you, and I’d hate to see that happen.”
I scoff, trying to play off the way her words have made my heart leap and flip around. “Please. As if I’d fall for Ian MacKenzie.”
A small knock comes at the door and a head pops in. “You decent?”
Happiness fills me to the point that I feel like I’m about to choke on it. “Ian! You came!” He must have broken all land-speed records to get here this quick. Maybe he was already shopping for me when I called. Just the idea makes me go all warm and gushy inside.
He pushes the door open more fully and nods at Andie. “Andie.”
“Ian,” she says, standing. “Where’d you come from?”
“Store.” He holds up a bag that has a big red circle on it. “Got what you asked for.” Tossing it on the bed, he turns around to leave.
“Where are you going?” I ask, worried he’s about to abandon me.
“Thought I’d wait outside ’til you’re dressed.”
I smile at Andie and give her the look. “Isn’t that polite of you, Ian. Thank you so much.”
“Sure.” He’s outside the door before Andie has a chance to say anything else in his presence.
She shakes her head. “You are seriously going to regret this. Mark my words.”
“That is just mean, Andie.” I shake my head. “I don’t get you. Why are you being like this? Is it lack of sleep or something? Hormones?” I pause, suddenly remembering she just had a baby. Duh. “It’s hormones, isn’t it?”
Andie turns sideways and takes my hand. “Babe. Listen to me. Ian is a sweetheart when he wants to be. I’m not arguing that. But he is not into commitment, do you understand what I’m saying? He’s had years to settle down and he’s done the exact opposite, okay? He’s raising hell in town every weekend, he drinks too much, he sleeps around. He’s not your type.”
I pull my hand from hers and take the bag Ian tossed into the room, opening it up to see what’s inside. “He hasn’t slept with old Banana, I’ll have you know. She was lying about that.”
“Whatever. If it wasn’t her, it was someone else. And I know you. You’re not the fling type. You say you are, but you aren’t.”
I frown at her. Some kind of alien has taken over my BFF’s body, apparently. Andie would know better than to say that about me. “What are you talking about? I have flings.”
“Name one.”
I lift my chin. This is an easy one. I fling around all the time. I’m the fling master. I’m a flinger of the highest degree. They call me the fling dinger. “Matthias.”
“You wanted to bear his children. You told me that after your first and only date. That is not a fling. It’s an obsession and the exact opposite.”
“I was only joking.” He was super cute, though. He had awesome DNA. I could see it in his cheekbones. You can tell a lot from a man’s cheekbones and other facial features.
“I still remember the baby names you told me you were going to use,” she says frowning, giving me the Andie evil-eye.
“Fine.” She wins that one. But I have more. Lots more. “What about Jason?”
“When he didn’t call after your third date you practically stalked him.”
I gasp. “I did not! I would never!”
“Okay, maybe stalk is a strong word, but you did friend him under a fake name on Facebook so you could check his relationship status and photos.”
My face burns with the memory. “I had too much wine. I can’t be held responsible for that night.”
“I’m just saying … you’re not the fling type. Your heart is too big for that kind of nonsense.”
I think about her comment for a few seconds before responding. “I do have a pretty big heart, that’s true. But I don’t think it means I can’t have a little fun while I’m here.” I have plenty of other fling stories to challenge her with, but there’s no point now. She’s made up her mind about me and about Ian.
Andie pulls me into a hug. “Have fun. Just don’t get your hopes up or your heart broken, okay? I don’t think I could handle it.”
I lean back to see her face. “Are you crying?”
“Of course I’m crying!” she shouts. “You almost got killed by a mountain lion for shit’s sake and now you’re about to get your heart crushed by a player who I can’t kill because I’m related to him!”
“Awww, poor baby …” I pat her cheek. “Those hormones are just kicking your ass right now, aren’t they?”
She slaps my hand away. “No, stupid, it’s not the hormones. It’s you, taking risks you shouldn’t. Now, where’s the gun?” She holds out her hand as if I’m supposed to put something in it.
“What gun?” I’m all innocence.
“The gun you bought.”
“I don’t know what you’re talking about.” I’m not technically lying since I don’t currently know where the gun is. I hope Ian has it in his truck or somewhere else safe. That thing saved our lives today. I think.
A knock comes at the door and Ian’s voice floats into the room. “You ready yet? I have to get going. If you want a ride, you’d better come now.”
I cut Andie’s next question off with a raised hand. “Save it for later. I have to get dressed and go before Nurse Ratched brings in the National Guard.”
Andie watches me while I struggle into the outfit Ian bought me at the store. My IV hole is dripping blood, but as soon as I’m dressed I slap the gauze back on it.
When I’m finally done and standing straight, I realize with the red plaid shirt and elastic waistband jeans Ian bought me, I look like a redneck slut from the nineteen forties on a bender. Andie and I stare at my sad self and then burst out laughing together.
“I’m not worried anymore,” Andie finally says, still smiling.
“Worried about what?”
“Worried that Ian will convince you to run away with him.”
“What’s that supposed to mean?” I ask, a little confused.
She points at me. “If that’s his idea of a cute outfit, he doesn’t stand a chance with you.”
Ha, ha, ha.
I laugh right along with her, but inside I’m telling her she doesn’t know diddly squat about me or Ian. He did this on purpose, which is his way of begging me to come at him with everything I’ve got. I’m giddy inside, knowing that he thinks he’s winning but that he’s wrong. I am seriously going to get him when he least expects it. He has totally met his match in me.