Lily wondered if Kath’s nonchalance was for show. “Then why get one at all?”
“It’s just—just in case. Why don’t I get one for you and then you can decide if you want to use it?”
“I don’t want you to get in trouble.”
“Don’t worry. I’ll ask Jean. She knew where to get them before.” The wind ruffled Kath’s cropped hair and made Lily shiver again, despite Kath’s jacket. “If Jean doesn’t know or can’t get it, then we’ll wait until you turn eighteen and we can go then.”
The thought of waiting that long suddenly seemed unbearable. “Oh, all right. Ask Jean,” Lily said before she could change her mind. “When will you ask her?”
“I’ll see her soon. She comes back once a month to visit her family. I’ll talk to her next time she’s back—probably next weekend.”
“Next weekend! That’s so soon.” A thrill went through Lily. She saw Kath break into a smile, and then a shiver as the wind swept around them again. “Oh, you’re cold,” Lily said. “We should go back.”
And just like that, their conversation was over, and the pocket of fog that had cloaked them before was moving them back up Van Ness and toward the gym, its lighted windows winking through the mist.
15
The Spook-A-Rama was still going full steam when they returned, shivering, to the warm, dry vestibule of the gym. Lily took off Kath’s jacket and handed it back to her, and Kath had just put it back on when the gym doors opened and Shirley emerged, clearly searching for someone.
“Lily!” Shirley called. “There you are. Where have you been? The punch bowls need to be refilled.”
Shirley came down the stairs, caught sight of Kath standing nearby, and paused a couple of steps before the bottom. “Kathleen?” she said in surprise.
“Hello, Shirley,” Kath said, looking uncomfortable.
Lily was relieved that she had given Kath her jacket back before Shirley saw them. “I was just going to the bathroom and I—I ran into Kath—Kathleen.”
Shirley stayed on the stairs, as if she didn’t want to come any closer. “You were gone a long time.”
“Well, I’m back now.” From the gym, the sound of the band swelled; they were playing another lively dance number. “It sounds like everything is going really well in there,” Lily said, trying to sound enthusiastic.
“Yes, it is,” Shirley said. “But you should have told me before you left the refreshment table.”
Lily swallowed a burst of irritation. “I’m sorry. I wasn’t feeling well.” It wasn’t entirely a lie.
“Well, are you feeling better?” Shirley asked impatiently. “Are you coming back?”
“Of course,” Lily said. There was no way to avoid it, and there was also no way to bring Kath with her; Shirley would never allow that. Lily glanced at Kath, wondering how she would communicate this to her, but Kath seemed to understand. She had buttoned up her jacket and slipped her hands into the pockets where Lily had warmed hers only minutes before.
“I’m heading home,” Kath said.
Shirley said nothing.
Lily wanted to say a dozen different things, but the only thing she could say was “Have a good night.” And then she turned away from Kath and walked toward Shirley, who started to go back up the stairs. Lily heard the exterior doors open and close as Kath left, and felt a breath of cold air on her legs.
Shirley paused outside the gym doors and turned back so that she was a couple of steps above Lily. “Before we go back in, I should warn you about Kathleen Miller,” Shirley said.
“Warn me?” Lily said, startled.
Shirley crossed her arms, looking down her nose at Lily. “You shouldn’t get involved with her.”
“What do you mean?”
Shirley came down one step so that they were only a foot apart and said in a low voice, “Don’t you remember what happened with Kathleen’s friend, Jean Warnock?”
Lily shook her head uneasily. “What about her?”
Shirley cast a glance behind her at the doors, which remained closed, and then looked back at Lily. “Jean’s queer. You don’t remember? Somebody caught her in the band room last year with—” Here Shirley grimaced in distaste. “With another girl.”
Lily’s skin prickled. “I never heard that,” she said neutrally.
“Honestly, sometimes I think you pay no attention to anything except your math homework and your space books.” Shirley gave her a funny look—half motherly, half exasperated.
The criticism flew past Lily; all she could think about was the fact that Shirley knew about Jean. And then she remembered what she had half-forgotten about Calvin, who had been in Jean’s class. The scandal. His junior year, he had started going steady with a girl (Lily couldn’t remember her name), which was unusual enough for a Chinatown kid, but it could have been tolerated if it had been kept under the table. The scandal had been that she wasn’t Chinese—she was Negro—and they’d been discovered together in Calvin’s car after a dance.
Shirley was still talking. “So you should stay away from Kathleen Miller. You don’t want those rumors near you.”
Lily took a step up so she was on Shirley’s level. “Did Calvin tell you about Jean?” Lily asked.
Shirley’s eyebrows drew together. “What? It doesn’t matter who told me about it. It only matters that you understand how important this is. You can’t be associated with people like that.”
Lily didn’t respond. She felt strangely disconnected from the moment, and yet she had never been so aware of the way Shirley’s forehead wrinkled when she was upset. Two little Vs had formed between her eyebrows, as if to point comically down her nose.
“If you know what’s good for you, you’ll make up with Will,” Shirley continued. “I talked to him earlier and he’s willing to dance with you. It would be a good idea—just in case anyone else saw you with Kathleen.”
“I don’t want to dance with him, and I wish you wouldn’t talk to him about me,” Lily said coolly. “And there’s nothing wrong with Kath.”
“‘Kath’?” Shirley said with the edge of a sneer in her voice. “Do you even hear yourself? Do you want people to think you’re friends with her?”