They were so boring. She was incredible.
“Alright,” her mother interjected, “as long as you’re okay. We’ll talk about this when I get home next week. I need at least a few hours of sleep tonight. I have to get to bed.”
I waited there for several minutes as footsteps pounded above, lights turned off, and doors closed, and after another minute, I swung around the bannister and slowly crept up the stairs, keeping an eye out for anyone still up.
Winter walked across the landing and headed into the bathroom, and as she started the shower and her music, I flew up the steps, dove in after her, and closed the door, grabbing her as she whipped around and sucked in a breath.
I kissed her, cutting off her cry, her protest fading away when she realized it was me.
I hauled her up, wrapped her legs around me, and I ate up her full lips, dragging out the bottom one between my teeth and tasting the tears still on her cheeks.
“What are you doing?” she asked, probably worried I’d be caught.
But I just shook my head, keeping my voice low in case her parents were still awake. “I don’t know, baby,” I told her. “Just don’t let me go, okay?”
She broke down, more tears spilling from her eyes as she kissed and held me so tight.
The lights were off, but the moon lit up the floor, and I slipped my hand under her skirt, letting her know I wanted her. My shit had nothing to do with the fact that she couldn’t see me. I wasn’t shallow, and this was so much more complicated than she would ever know. Hopefully ever know.
We deserved one night. A few minutes or a few hours, just a little longer.
I knew this was bad. I knew I was fucked.
She hated me. Her family hated me.
She was one of the few people I didn’t want to hurt.
I was nineteen, and she was too young.
But her mouth. Her damn mouth, leaving little kisses on the corner of mine, her tongue teasing me, the taste of her skin…
I wanted to swallow her up.
“Something I Can Never Have” played, the shower ran, and it was like we were in the fountain as kids again. Everything was pure and sweet, just for that short amount of time, and this was how it was supposed to happen. It was always going to happen with us.
I wanted to feel her on me. Her skin on mine. I wanted every inch of her.
Carrying her to the sink, I set her down and she pulled up my sweatshirt and T-shirt, helping me get them off. I dropped them to the floor and held her face, kissing her again and again, my tongue meeting hers and our heat and breath mixing together.
I pulled back, looking at her eyes as I slipped the bow tie off and unbuttoned her blouse. She ran her hands down my chest all the way to my stomach, fingering the grooves and dips, and I groaned at how good her fingers felt.
This was the only way she could see me, and even though it made my blood race in the most unbearable way, I tried to be patient and let her explore.
Fingers splayed over my collarbone, across my shoulders, down my arms, tracing the lines and muscles on my chest and stomach, and then she slipped her fingers under the waist of my jeans, filling my groin with heat.
“Winter…” I barely whispered.
I wished she knew my name. I wanted to hear her say it.
Why did she feel so different than anyone else?
She slipped out of her shirt, but when she reached around to unclasp her bra, I stopped her, pulling the straps off her shoulders instead and kissing a path up her collarbone to her neck.
Wrapping my arm around her, I brought her body against mine, my groin rubbing between her legs, aching painfully as I kissed her forehead.
“I want you to be my first,” she whispered.
I closed my eyes.
“I want it to be you,” she continued, “even if you’re going to disappear on me again, I want it to be you.”
I dug my fingers into her young thighs, wanting to fuck her on this sink right now and kiss her until I couldn’t move anymore.
I wanted her first time.
“I…” Fuck, I needed to leave. “I…”
“You. I want you.” She peppered my neck with kisses. “I love how the world looks when I’m with you. I want it to be you.”
She sucked on my neck, gently sinking her teeth in, and my body exploded with a charge of electric current, my dick begging to get out of these jeans, and I slipped my hand into her hair, holding her mouth to my body. “Fuck.”
“Do you have your phone?” she asked against my skin.
“Yeah, why?”
“Take a picture of me doing this,” she whispered. “If you disappear, I want you to remember me.”
Baby, I’ve never disappeared. I’ve always been here. This past summer when you were lying on the beach, I was there. When you went into the shop with your mom for a coffee, I was right there.
She never knew how close I always was.
I dug out my phone and turned it on, remembering I had the group phone. It didn’t matter. I’d transfer it later.
“A video, okay?” I breathed out. “I want to have everything.”
The way she moved, the sounds she made… I wanted to remember this when I couldn’t have her anymore.
Starting a recording, I focused on us and closed my eyes, saving the sounds and images of her pretty face kissing me forever.
“Keep going,” I begged.
She licked and nibbled my neck, and I tipped my head back, gripping the back of hers. She took my mouth, sinking her tongue inside mine, and I went fucking weak. The phone spilled out of my hand, and I took her in my arms, holding her tight.
“Goddammit, Winter,” I said low. “You’re killing me.”
She trailed her mouth down my chest and back up again, and my muscles charged with desire so strong I couldn’t wait anymore. I pinned her hands behind her back and took over, kissing and biting her with her at my mercy.
She gasped. “I love…” But she stopped herself, realizing what she was about to say.
I hovered over her lips, anger and happiness mixing in with my desire.
Love me? You love me? We’ve met three times, and she didn’t even know my name.
But she was quick to recover. “I hate you,” she said instead. “I hate you so much.”
I gripped her hands, feeling the passion rise, a little smile pulling at my lips. “Yeah, I hate you, too,” I told her, hefting her up into my arms and carrying her to the shower. “I just want a hot piece of ass.”
“Yeah?” she egged me on.
I dropped her to her feet, not taking my eyes off her face and I yanked her bra down to her stomach, pulling that and her skirt down her legs and off her body.
She brought up her arms, immediately covering her chest as she stood there in her white panties.
I stripped off the rest of my clothes and slid my hands into the back of her underwear, gripping her ass and pulling her into me.
“Take your arms away,” I muttered over her lips.
She hesitated, our chests rising and falling in shallow breaths, completely in sync.
“I want to see,” I told her.
Slowly, she let her arms fall away, and I felt her nipple and flesh brush my chest, but I couldn’t take my eyes off her beautiful face.
I didn’t want her first time. I wanted every time.
But I didn’t want to love her, either. I didn’t want it to feel like this. It couldn’t feel like this.
When she found out I lied, she’d hate me.
This had no future.
It was just sex.
Peeling her panties down her legs, I kissed her stomach, feeling her tremble under my mouth, and then I backed her into the shower, closing the frosted door before I pinned her against the black marble wall.
Steam filled the air in a cloud, the hot spray sending chills all over my body as I leaned down and dove into her mouth.
“Your parents are bad,” I said, repeating my words from the first time I scared her. “Your sister lacks any depth to be interesting. I told you I was going to hurt you. Didn’t I?”
She nodded. “You promised.”
My cock twitched, immediately nudging her between her legs.
“I did,” I said. “I told you someday I’d hurt you.”