Josh looked over at Norton. “I will take this to my grave. We never had this conversation.”
Norton looked at Josh like he had no idea what he was saying but he was happy someone who cared was beside him.
Josh thought maybe that was all anyone wanted.
* * *
Josh double-checked that he and Sasha had everything they needed for Colorado and then put the suitcases in the car. He gathered up Norton’s supplies, and the three of them drove to Layla’s. “Hey,” she said when she opened the door. She smiled and reached down to ruffle Norton’s fur. “Come on in.”
“Can you please send pictures of Norton like last time?” Sasha asked.
“Of course,” Layla said. “I know you’re going to miss him, but don’t worry. I’ll take good care of him.”
“Any big plans?” Josh asked. “Still quite a bit of break left.”
“You’re looking at it,” she said, pointing to the slippers on her feet and the mug of hot tea in her hand.
“Staying out of the cold, huh?”
“I might head out at some point to see a movie.”
“With your boyfriend?” He’d been preoccupied with setting down Norton’s food and water bowls and didn’t think about what he was asking before it came out of his mouth.
“No. I mean, I don’t have a boyfriend. I meant one of my friends from work. Tonya. The teacher who’s always with me in the morning.”
“Oh, sure.” He leaned down and scratched Norton’s ears.
There was an awkward silence as they stood there while Sasha hugged Norton and told him not to be sad. Then Sasha said, “Let’s go, Daddy,” and they said their good-byes, and Josh was still thinking about Layla when they boarded the plane two hours later.
chapter 24
Layla
It was the first truly cold and miserable evening of the season, with windchills around ten below and a thick blanket of snow on the ground. Layla had never been so happy to be inside the home she bought on her own, sitting on the couch she’d paid for, wearing her comfiest yoga pants and warmest socks, a dog curled up next to her. Dinner that night was a cup of tomato soup, a few crackers with cheese, and a Coke. Layla still cooked a few of her favorite recipes and stacked them in their glass containers in the freezer, but mostly she allowed herself the pleasure of eating intuitively, and now dinner was whatever the hell she felt like eating.
Layla did not miss having someone to cook for. Maybe it would have been different if she and Liam had cooked together side by side in the kitchen as they shared snippets of their day. But during their marriage Liam had just expected Layla to do it once she started working for the school because she got home so much earlier than he did. There were a lot of things Liam had enjoyed without having to put any of the effort toward them himself: shirts that got dropped off and magically returned from the cleaner’s, appointments scheduled for oil changes and dentist visits, and a fridge and cupboards stocked full of groceries. Liam earned more money than her, and Layla had often felt like there was an unspoken expectation that she would manage the household, as if to offset the discrepancies in their financial contributions. From the moment she moved in with him, Layla was the one who made sure there was always toilet paper in the bathroom.
The news ended and Wheel of Fortune came on. Vanna White and Pat Sajak were still solving those puzzles. (How? Oh my God, how? And weren’t they bored out of their minds?) One of the contestants, a woman who was a newlywed, gushed to Pat about her new husband and the honeymoon they had just returned from.
“Yeah, sure, it’s all fun and games for a while,” Layla shouted at the TV. The novelty of newlywed bliss would fade and real life, without its fairy-tale sheen, would take its place and there was a reason everyone said the first year of marriage was often the hardest.
* * *
They argued about the wedding budget right out of the gate. Liam was pushing hard for a splashy reception at a high-end hotel in downtown Rochester. “My parents are not going to pay for that,” Layla said.
“Well, I don’t want to cheap out on this.”
“My family is not cheap,” Layla said. “They’re smart. They realize it doesn’t make sense to blow a ton of money on a party that lasts one night. My dad even joked once that he’d give twenty grand to any kid who wanted to elope. We could fly somewhere warm, get married on a beach, and save whatever’s left.”
“I don’t want to elope,” Liam said. “People who elope are people who can’t afford a wedding. Or they’re pregnant. Or hiding something.”
“That’s not the only reason,” Layla said. “Do you know how much it costs to throw a big lavish wedding? It’s dumb to spend that much for one night.”
He didn’t say anything for a minute and neither did she. Finally, he looked at her, his face softening, and said, “I just want it to be nice. For us. Will you talk to your parents? Just find out what they’re willing to contribute, and I’ll pay for the rest. I don’t expect them to shoulder the cost of something they’re not comfortable with. They’re not obligated to pay for this.”
Liam had left inside sales behind and was currently the highest-producing sales rep for Pfizer. His earnings seemed mind-blowing to Layla, but she worried that a lavish wedding would be less about them and more about showing everyone how well he was doing. And there was that slight, niggling guilt about not holding up her end of the partnership as she chased her dreams, waiting patiently for success that might never come.
The paychecks she received from the band barely contributed to their household income, but the fact that Liam made so much more than she did made her feel like she didn’t have a voice when it came to how he wanted to spend it. She had recently heard about an opening for music teachers in their school district, and the guilt of not holding her own financially had started to gnaw at her. But the band was on the verge of breaking out, and she felt like she owed it to the rest of the members to stick around a little longer. And if she was being truthful with herself, she wanted them to succeed even more than they did. It kept her from falling asleep at night. She would lie awake beside Liam thinking about all the exciting things that could happen—the record deals, the live shows. A tour. She dreamed of living her life onstage. She would turn her passion into a successful career, and she’d make good money, too. She didn’t think a lot about how that would work—her on the road and Liam at home. Surely, they could figure out how to handle success for both of them? Those are the good kinds of problems to have, she told herself.