“You’ve done it before,” I said with a hopeful smile.
“No, don’t look at me like that.” He shook his head, then sighed. “Fine. I’ll keep this between us. But Bryn, this is a very dangerous game you’re playing.”
“I know,” I admitted, and squeezed his hand. “Thank you for keeping my secret.”
“You can always trust me with your secrets,” he said with a crooked smile, and the look in his eyes made my heart ache. “You know, that’s the real reason I went on this mission.”
“What is?” I asked.
“I was afraid you’d run into Konstantin, and I didn’t want you to go up against him alone. And then I wasn’t even there when you fought with him,” he said, and guilt flashed across his face.
“I was fine. I took care of myself,” I insisted.
“No, I know.” He lowered his eyes for a second, taking a fortifying breath, as if he were building up to something. His hand was still in mine, and he ran his thumb across it. Finally, he lifted his head, meeting my eyes willfully. “On the train, you questioned my commitment to the mission.”
“Ridley, I didn’t mean it. I know you did everything you could in Calgary—”
He held up his other hand, silencing me. “I know, and I’m sorry that things didn’t work out better for Emma and for you in Calgary, and I’m sorry that we didn’t arrive sooner. But I’m still glad I went. For you, I would lay down my life any day.”
If he’d leaned in to kiss me then, I would’ve let him. I would’ve gladly thrown my arms around his neck and pulled him tighter to me as his lips pressed against mine.
But he didn’t. He just stared into my eyes for a moment, filling me with a heat that made me feel light-headed and nervous and wonderful all at once.
Then there was a knock at the door, and he pulled his hand away from me, and the moment was shattered, and I could suddenly breathe again.
As Ridley got up to answer the door, I looked up through the small windows near the roof and tried to peer through. I got a glimpse of a girl, and I was hit by the painful realization that I’d stayed here too long. That I shouldn’t have come to visit at all.
“Oh, good, you’re home!” Juni said in relieved delight when Ridley opened the door, and I was already hurrying to pull on my boots. She threw her arms around him, hugging him tightly, and my cheeks flushed with guilt at the fantasy I’d just been having in which I would hold her boyfriend in much the same way.
“I was so worried about you,” she said as she held him.
“I’m okay, I’m fine,” he tried to comfort her.
I cleared my throat as I put on my coat, since they were standing in the doorway, blocking my exit.
“Oh, Bryn, I didn’t realize you were here.” Juni let go of Ridley and gave me a wide smile. “I’m glad to see you made it back safely, too.” Her smile gave way to sadness. “I heard about the poor girl in Calgary.”
“Thank you, but I should really be going,” I said, returning her smile with a lame one of my own.
“You don’t need to go.” Ridley pulled away from Juni so he could turn to me.
“No, I do. You two need to catch up anyway.”
I couldn’t force a smile much longer, so I slid past them as politely and quickly as I could. With hurried steps, I walked back to my loft, feeling more conflicted and lost than I ever had before.
TWENTY-FOUR
oath
“Do you wanna talk about it?” Ember stood over me looking down, so her bangs were falling into her eyes. Her arm had a brace on it, but otherwise the medic had almost completely healed her, and she spotted me as I did bench presses.
“Nope,” I said through gritted teeth and pushed the bar above my chest before slowly lowering it back down.
“Well, I think you should,” Ember persisted. “You and Ridley got back from Calgary yesterday, and you’ve hardly said anything.” She paused, waiting until I finished my rep and racked the bar. “I know you must feel terrible about what happened with that girl.”
I sat up, wiping sweat off my brow with the back of my arm. “I know you mean well, but I really don’t wanna talk about it.”
“Okay,” she relented. “But I’m here if you need me.”
“Thank you.” I smiled up at her, but it fell away when I saw Ridley enter the gym behind her.
I’d been avoiding him since yesterday, and I had planned on avoiding him for as long as I possibly could. But since he was walking toward where Ember and I were working out, it seemed like my time was up. He wore slacks and a suit vest, so he definitely wasn’t here for exercise.
Ridley stopped when he was near enough that he wouldn’t have to shout, and then he motioned to us. “Bryn, Ember, you’re needed in classroom 103.”
“What do you mean, we’re needed in a classroom?” I asked.
“Yeah, and by who?” Ember added.
“It’s an impromptu meeting,” he said without elaborating, then turned to walk away.
“A meeting? With who?” Ember asked.
“Just come on!” he called without looking back to see if we followed.
Ember exchanged a look with me, and I just shrugged and took a swig from my water bottle. My tank top was sweaty in a couple places, and my yoga pants were frayed and old. I hoped whoever we were having our meeting with wasn’t super-important, because Ridley didn’t imply that I had time to change.
We walked down the hall out of the gym, past the classrooms where trackers-in-training were studying proper techniques, social etiquette, and human history. Room 103 was one of the larger classrooms and was located right next to the Rektor’s office.
When we reached it, Tilda and Simon Bohlin were already seated at desks, along with half a dozen other top trackers who had already returned with their changelings. Ridley stood near the front of the room, and leaning against the teacher’s desk with his arms crossed was King Evert.
He was dressed somewhat casually, in a suit with a black shirt and no tie. He hadn’t worn his crown, but he rarely did, except for special occasions. Still, I regretted not hurrying to the locker room to change.
“Are these the last two?” Evert asked as Ember and I slowly took our seats at two empty desks near the front.
“Yes.” Ridley went over to shut the door behind us, and then he took his spot next to the King. “This is every tracker that’s back.”
Evert stared out at the room. The light glinted off his slicked-back raven hair, and one ankle was crossed over the other. I’d rarely seen him without his usual smirk, but the expression he wore now was decidedly grim.
“My wife doesn’t want us to go to war,” he said finally, his words carrying a weight they usually lacked. He looked as if he felt much more resigned to being a leader than he ever had before. “She wants us to solve things peacefully and quietly, sneaking changelings in during the night. And that’s why she doesn’t know about this meeting.
“An accused traitor killed one of our children, and if he has his way, I’m sure he’ll kill more,” King Evert went on.
I lowered my eyes, but I could feel Ridley’s gaze on me, almost willing Evert’s words to take hold in me.
“I agree with my wife on many things. She tries to be kind and fair.” Evert uncrossed his arms and put his hands on the desk behind him. “But when someone is shedding the blood of our people, that’s where I draw the line. That’s when I say fuck it. Let’s go to war.”
“We’re going to war?” Tilda asked, too surprised to be afraid to speak out to the King. “Against who?”
“Konstantin Black and Bent Stum and anyone they might be working with,” Evert explained. “There’s no point in going after the changelings, because he’s one step ahead of us every time. He’s anticipating our moves. So now we’re going after him.”
“How will we find them?” Ember asked.