“How am I supposed to forget seeing him that way? Now I’m not going to be able to sleep for worrying that the police will come and arrest you. Ash, this could fuck up the rest of your life! It’s not worth that. Nothing is worth the rest of your life.”
“You’re wrong,” he ground out. “Me making sure that son of a bitch never comes near you again is worth everything. I’m not going to argue with you over this, Josie. This was my call. We do it my way. You knew that going in. Rules don’t change because you decide you don’t like something.”
“But you said . . .”
“What did I say, baby?”
She huffed in a breath, expelling it long over her lips. “You said it wasn’t like that. That I have a choice. That you wouldn’t do something I didn’t want.”
He sighed patiently, his gaze boring into her face. “Baby, it’s done. You don’t get a choice because the choice has already been made. And I’m not going to apologize for not discussing it with you beforehand. It was my choice to make. You belong to me. Told you from the start that I take that very seriously. That means I protect you. I do whatever it takes to make sure you’re safe and well cared for.”
“Would I have ever known if I hadn’t run into him?” she whispered.
Ash immediately shook his head. Unapologetic. Gaze steady. Unwavering.
“No. Not something I’d ever want you to know or even think about. I’m pissed because you had to see him at all.”
She closed her eyes and shook her head, trying to shake off the buzzing in her ears. This was crazy, wasn’t it? Ash had taken a huge risk. For her. Not one she’d have wanted him to take. No way in hell. How could he be so certain nothing would fall back on him? The only thing he seemed annoyed about at all was that she’d run into Michael. It was obvious that Ash never had any intention of her knowing anything about it. And she wasn’t sure how she felt about that.
The saying went that ignorance was bliss, and she supposed in this case it was. She wished she didn’t know. Maybe she wouldn’t feel so unsettled. And so uncertain of the man she’d committed to in a huge way.
“Josie, you’re overthinking this,” Ash chided softly. “This is why I would have never had you know about this. No good can come of you worrying or stressing over this. And if this brings us into question for you, then I can only tell you that I’ve been honest with you. I’ve been straightforward. Never tried to hide the kind of man I am from you. And I told you from the start that we do things my way. You’re mine to protect. To care for. I can guarantee you that nothing like this will ever touch you. Don’t want you thinking about it. Can you do that for me?”
She sucked in a deep breath as Ash watched her intently, waiting for her response. This was huge. He was basically asking her if she could get over it and move on. That she not freak out about this. That she trust him. Those were big things to ask. She’d assumed he was a businessman. A wealthy, powerful businessman. She’d never imagined for one minute that he was immersed in gray, murky areas or that he would even be capable of meting out violence to someone who’d hurt something he considered his own.
It shouldn’t surprise her, and maybe that was what she grappled with. The idea that maybe it hadn’t been as shocking to her as it should have been. It would explain why she was trying to muster up outrage. Or all the appropriate responses. Because she wasn’t feeling them and she thought she should be.
“Josie?” Ash questioned quietly. “I need an answer from you, baby.”
“Yes,” she finally said. “I can do that for you, Ash.”
He gathered her in his arms and pressed his lips to her forehead. She closed her eyes, melting into his embrace.
“It scares me, Ash. Not for the reasons you might think, and maybe I feel guilty over that. But what scares me isn’t that you’re this person who went out and beat the crap out of someone. I don’t worry that you’re capable of hurting me that way. But what scares me is the thought of losing you. Of you going to jail because you were protecting me. I don’t want that. I never want that.”