“Neph says I need to learn to kill or I will be killed,” she said quietly.
“I hope I am always there to do it for you. I don’t want to see you become as callous as the rest of us,” Finn replied, running his fingers through her hair. “It doesn’t even faze us anymore, but then, I’m sure you noticed that last night. To see you care so much for everyone …,” he trailed off as if searching for words and then smiled. “It makes me want to see the Merrodin you rebuild. I don’t think there will be another land like it. It will be as beautiful as you are, I think,”
Jala gave a soft laugh and brushed at her eyes gently with the back of her hand. She had no explanation for why her eyes had gone glassy with his words. Sniffling slightly, she shook her head at him. “That [b]we[b] build. You are going to win today and be right beside me when we build it,” she corrected gently and kissed him.
“I always win,” he agreed with a smile and leaned back against his pillow, looking at her with a cautious expression. “You know we could always build strength quietly and let the worst of this blow over for now,” he offered with obvious hesitation.
“What do you mean?” she asked.
“We could spend a year or two in Firym and build resources and then rebuild Merrodin. It would be safer. Things are in too much turmoil right now,” he explained. “With the Blights and what the Fionaveir have planned, I mean. We made no promises to them,” he added.
Leaning back to rest on her elbow, she considered his words. The thought was tempting, in truth, but by doing so she would be abandoning the people in this district for even longer. There was the matter of the oaths sworn to her as well. Would her friends understand if she simply changed her mind? “I can’t, Finn. Too many people are depending on us to move soon,” she said finally and felt her chest tighten at the wave of sadness that echoed through their link.
“It was worth a try,” he said with a smile that she knew was fake. “In for a copper, in for a gold then. To hell with safety,” he added and shook his head at her frown. “Vezradesh, you worship Fortune. How can I honestly ask you not to gamble and take risks?” he said, trying to lighten her mood.
“Why did I get so much sadness from you when I said no, Finn? Do you not think we can do it?” she asked quietly.
“I know we can do it, Jala. I just think that the faster we move the more painful the road is going to be,” he replied and pulled her close again. “I’ve had enough depressing talk I think,” he said with a grin. “I love you, Jala, and whatever you decide, you have my support. Let’s just leave it at that.” He spoke quietly but the sincerity of the words rang loudly.
Smiling faintly, she kissed him again. “I’m depressed and worried sick and stressed beyond all reason about everything, Finn. Think you could possibly distract me from the world for a while?” she asked quietly.
“I’m positive I can,” Finn replied with a smirk and winked at her. “Give me an hour and you won’t even remember your own name,” he promised and gave her another kiss.
Jala focused her full attention on him and tried to ignore the nagging voice in the back of her mind that warned that this might be the last time she ever kissed him. Feeling her eyes going glassy again with the thought, she kissed him harder and pushed all thoughts from her mind savagely. For now she was content to simply rely on instinct and desire.
*
“I’ll see you at the Arena in a couple of hours,” Jala promised as she watched Finn and Valor head for the door.
Neph rose slowly from his chair and sighed. “I’ll go keep an eye on the idiots,” he offered and followed after them.
Finn paused at the doorway and looked back to her. “The fight won’t be until this evening so do what you have to do and don’t worry. I’m just going to get gear in order and take care of a few minor details.” He pulled the door open and glanced back again. “Keep Marrow and Emily close by you all day, though,” he added.
“I will, I promise,” she agreed and watched the door close behind the three of them. “I think I’m going to be sick,” she whispered to Sovann and Wisp.
“He will be fine,” Wisp assured her with a smile.
“He is going to get his ass handed to him in several small pieces. It’s Kithkanon he is fighting, and the man is a damned legend,” Sovann said, earning a sharp elbow from Wisp.
“Yes I’m going to be sick,” Jala said with a slight nod and rose quickly from her chair. Her stomach roiled and she took a deep breath and paced trying to calm it back down. She really had no desire to see her breakfast for a second time.
“Just calm down. It will be okay,” Wisp said, standing quickly to take Jala’s elbow and steady her. “Finn is the best with swords. There is no one better, not even Kithkanon,” Wisp continued, her voice soothing. Sovann gave a snort of amusement and Wisp glared at him fiercely.
Clearing his throat, Sovann nodded at Jala. “He will be fine. Finn is oh, so talented,” he said, managing to keep most of the doubt from his voice.
Jala nodded and paced across the room again. “How is Isador? Is she awake yet?” she asked in an effort to get her mind off the duel.
“She was awake for a bit this morning but seemed a bit out of it. I suppose she got a rather good knock on the head in the fight. Your healing likely saved her life,” Wisp explained. “I think she will be fine. It will just take some time.”
“I’ll keep an eye on her and make sure she stays safe,” Sovann assured her. “Are you going by the Copper Penny to check on the boy from Merrodin you mentioned?” he asked as she began to pace again.
Jala nodded absently. “We are going there first, actually. I want to know how he survived and if he is willing to help,” she replied.