“Fuck!” he grunts, pained, more from seeing me in so much agony than at the damage I’m causing him with my nails.
I try to breathe through it while praying to the Virgen de Guadalupe to give me the strength I need to deliver this baby. I have no doubt I want to have more children, but right now, I’d sell my soul to the devil himself for an epidural. Once the worst of the contraction has passed, I let go of Shay’s arm and entwine my hand in his instead.
“It’s okay. I’m okay.”
“You fucking don’t look it, petal,” he chokes, looking awfully pale himself.
“I’ll be fine. Just find me our doctor and get me in a room. This baby wants to come out now. He’s just as headstrong as his father, calling the shots before he’s even born.”
I crane my neck back and look up and smile at my husband. He throws me a conspiring wink, but I can tell he’s just as anxious and nervous as the rest of them.
When a nurse at the end of the hall waves her hand, calling us into a room, Tiernan speeds up.
“Mrs. Kelly, seems like your boy is in a hurry to come into the world,” Doctor McNamara greets with a warm, kind smile as he ushers us into my private room.
“Less talking, more moving, Doc. Rosa is in a world of pain, and I can’t guarantee if she screams again that my cousin won’t break a wall in,” Shay tries to joke, but it falls flat on the floor with the worried expression on his face.
Colin picks me up from the wheelchair and lies me on the bed like I’m made of crystal. I press my hand to his cheek to ease his worry.
“I’m okay, Col. This is normal. Millions of women do this every day.”
“None of those women belong to us. You do,” he whispers, kissing my sweaty temple.
I’m about to say something to console him, but then another contraction blows any chance of that happening.
“OHHHH GOD!” I scream, biting down on my bottom lip so hard, I pierce the flesh.
Tiernan grabs my face in his hands while Colin and Shay take one of my hands on opposite sides of me.
“No more of that, acushla. I won’t have you in any more pain than you necessarily have to be in,” he coos, releasing my lip from my teeth’s grip. “Can you give her something to ease the pain?” he asks the doctor, who is currently under my blue hospital dressing gown, head deep in between my legs.
His head pops up and then gives it a saddened shake.
“Unfortunately, Rosa’s labor has progressed too far already. The bad news is that we can’t risk giving her an epidural now.”
“Virgen. And what’s the good news?” I pant.
“The good news is that your boy will be in your arms sooner than you think. Now Rosa, when the next contraction starts and I say push, I need you to give me all that you’ve got. Can you do that for me?”
“She can do it. She’s a fighter,” Shay proclaims proudly, giving my hand a light squeeze.
“I don’t doubt that.” Dr. McNamara grins, his head going back to monitor my progress.
“Doctor, should we start clearing the room? There seems to be a lot of unnecessary people here,” one of the nurses says, giving my men the evil eye.
“You. Out,” Tiernan orders, pointing at her. “The only unnecessary person in this room is you. Don’t show your face again. My wife does not need your toxicity around her.”
The nurse pales and looks to Dr. McNamara for support, but since he’s elbow deep in helping me give birth, her fragile ego takes the hint that he won’t come to her rescue. When Colin looks like he’s going to forcefully pull her out of the room by her hair if he has to, she quickly hurries out and disappears from my sight.
Maybe in another life I would have been patient with her closed mindedness and tried to make her understand that my relationship with my men is as natural and solid as any other. But after the Father Doyle incident, I found I have little tolerance for those who look down on me or try to shame me and my men and the love we share.
Just because it’s unconventional and on the fringe of society’s rules on what they deem is an acceptable relationship, doesn’t make what I feel for my men any less real. We are a family. One that loves, cherishes, and takes care of each other. If the world had more love in it like what I feel on a daily basis, then a wondrous place it would be.
“Here it comes,” I shout when another contraction hits me.
“Push, Rosa. Push!” the doctor orders, and I do as he says.
My eyes squint shut, and I push as hard as I can. When the contraction stops, I let out a relieved exhale that I’ve survived it.
“Good job, Rosa. We’re almost there,” the doctor praises.
I keep breathing in and out, happy that at least there is one person in this room that doesn’t look like they are about to keel over.
“What are you doing?” I ask Shay in alarm when he moves away from me to catch a peek of what’s happening under my dressing gown.
“I just want to have a quick look.” He shrugs mischievously.
“Shay Liam Kelly, you come back here right this second! I don’t want you to see any of… that.” I point to whatever is happening down there.
“Ah, petal. Don’t be a buzzkill. Just a little peek,” he teases with a wink.
I’m about to order him to move his ass, but then another contraction decides my energy is best served in dealing with the real matter at hand.
“That’s it, Rosa. Push! Push!” Doctor McNamara shouts.
As I try to push with all my might, I catch a glimpse of Shay’s expression turning from curious to green. He then starts moving as fast as he can away from where Doctor McNamara has his hands. I would laugh if I wasn’t in so much pain.
“What? What’s wrong? Is the baby okay?” Colin asks with concern when Shay returns with a sickly, ashen expression on his face.
When Colin tries to let go of my hand to see for himself, Shay shakes his head to stop him.
“I wouldn’t do that if I was you. Some things are better off left unseen.” He then tilts his head over to Tiernan and points a menacing finger at his brother.