So what did you do about this…harassment?
At first I tried to ignore it; when that didn’t work, I went back to popping Valium. That helped for a while, but then Dixon started to play nasty. One day in the grocery checkout I realized I’d forgotten to get butter, and when I ran back to the dairy case, someone had turned all the milk cartons so that the missing-kid photos were face-out. They were all boys, and all looking at me with these disappointed expressions.
That was just too much. I mean, Harold and Maude, OK, that was funny in a demented sort of way, but this, to me, this was no joke.
So next I got this idea that I should leave town again. It didn’t really make sense, because Dixon’s jurisdiction wasn’t limited the way the SFPD’s is—Malfeasance is everywhere. But it was all I could think to do at that point.
What made you choose Las Vegas as a destination?
It wasn’t my choice. Where I wanted to go was the Pacific Northwest, Seattle or maybe Portland. I figured it’d be a nice change of climate, plus that part of the country is Mecca for serial killers, so I knew I’d have lots of work once True let me out of the doghouse. But it turned out True had other plans for me.
I went to this travel agency that specialized in helping people plan moves, and asked for some info on Washington and Oregon. The woman behind the desk looked at me like I was nuts. “The economy up there is terrible right now. Have you thought about Nevada?”
“Nevada?”
“Las Vegas is booming. It’s one of the only cities in the country that hasn’t been hurt by the recession. They’re building thousands of new homes a month.”
“Sorry, I’m not interested.”
“No, really, you should think about it. Just wait here, Jane, let me get you some literature…” She went into a back room, and I got the hell out of there. I hadn’t told her my name.
Back at my apartment, I gulped down three Valium and turned on the TV. I’d programmed it to skip over stations that showed movies or sex-offender trials, which didn’t leave a whole lot. Can you guess what the theme on the Travel Channel was that night?
Las Vegas?
Three shows in a row. You’d almost think the L.V. chamber of commerce was paying the network to advertise. And then when I clicked over to ESPN, they were covering a poker tournament at Binion’s Casino.
I switched off the TV and picked up the phone.
“Jane Charlotte.”
“Yeah, I’m calling for Bob True again. Tell him I got the message.”
“Look behind you.”
I turned around to see True coming out of my kitchen. “What’s in Las Vegas?” I asked him.
“An operation we believe you’d be perfect for.”
“You don’t have anything perfect someplace nicer?” True just arched an eyebrow, as if to say, You want me to cut you off for another three months? “Yeah, OK,” I said. “So what is it?”
“The details will be given to you by your handler after you arrive.”
“You’re not supervising me on this one?”
“I’ll be along later, but during the initial phase of the operation, you’ll be working with a colleague of mine named Robert Wise.”
“Is everyone in Cost-Benefits named Bob?”
“Wise isn’t with Cost-Benefits,” True said. “He’s a Scary Clown.”
“You’re teaming me with a Clown? What kind of op is this?”
“It’s not the nature of the operation so much as its location. The Scary Clowns consider Las Vegas to be their fiefdom, and they are extremely territorial. It’s not really possible for us to run an operation there without including them. But don’t worry, Wise is a good man. He’s…much less random than some of the others.”
“Great. So when do I leave?”
“We need you ready to go by Thursday. Catering will handle the travel arrangements.”