***
After I’d showered and cleaned up, I put on some old jean shorts and a black T-shirt to work on my car. Despite the lack of rain—my favorite kind of weather—the sky was beautiful, with barely any clouds, and the light breeze blew the fragrant summer scents through all the windows in the house.
I bounced down the stairs—with new energy in my step—and stopped to listen wistfully at the boys’ music carrying through the air from next door. I glanced out the window and spotted Madoc, Jax, and Jared all hanging outside around Jax’s Mustang and looking under the hood.
Jared had changed into jeans, and he had a white T-shirt hanging out of his back pocket, and oh, my God . . . a light layer of sweat cooled my back as I took in the sight of the smooth, muscular slope of his back from his neck down to his waist.
The sun beat down on his bare skin, good tunes completed the scene, and I didn’t want to be anywhere else.
Heading into my garage, I hit the door opener, the wash of sunlight hitting the tires and then the hood and front windshield of my dad’s old Chevy Nova.
I grabbed a clean shop cloth off a worktable and slipped it into my back pocket before tying up my hair into a ponytail.
My feet tingled inside my ratty old black Chucks, so before I could chicken out, I walked outside.
I immediately felt Jared’s eyes on me as I unlocked my car, reached in the driver’s side door, and popped the hood. I was trying not to look across my yard to where he was, but then I realized that was a little childish.
So I looked over as I lifted the hood and saw Fallon heading toward me. Behind her was Jared, with his back to me and looking over his shoulder. Those damn brown eyes weren’t on my face, though.
With his eyebrows pinched together, he looked almost angry as his gaze slid up my legs, slowly traveling up my thighs and to my waist. The legion of butterflies you usually get on a roller coaster was now fluttering between my legs, and I breathed out a slow breath to calm myself down.
His hungry gaze met mine, and then he turned around, a model of control.
But that’s the thing. If Jared hadn’t really changed that much, then the need he was feeling wasn’t being forced away.
It was collecting.
And fuck me if I was in his line of sight when it overloaded.
I dove into my garage, assembling the few tools I’d need as Fallon grabbed a stool from the workbench to hang out with me as she watched. “Wish You Hell” by Like a Storm carried over from Jax’s yard, and I busied myself, diving under my hood to perform maintenance work.
During the next hour, Juliet arrived after finishing her volunteer tutoring sessions at the high school. She dashed over, gave Jax a seriously long kiss, and then joined Fallon and me as I replaced some spark plugs, cleaned out some connections, and performed the regular weekly stuff like checking my oil and the pressure on my tires.
“Hey.”
I looked up from under the hood to see Jared’s assistant, Pasha, approach.
“Mind if I hang out?” she asked.
I jerked my chin to another stool. “Of course not. Have a seat.”
She hopped up on the stool, lifting her glasses to the top of her head. She was quiet and cute, and I was really relieved that she seemed easy to get along with, despite her attitude.
Even with the jet black hair with purple chunks, and the eyebrow piercings and studded black belt, she still looked incredibly innocent. She wore skinny jeans and a black and gray flannel shirt, rolled up at the sleeves. Her hair was curled into loose waves, and other than the heavy makeup on her eyes, she was fresh faced.
Juliet kicked her flats to the ground and put her feet up on a footrest on the stool. “So Madoc’s pressuring you pretty hard?” she asked Fallon, continuing their conversation about Madoc wanting kids.
Fallon nodded, swallowing the drink she’d just taken from her water bottle. “Yeah,” she said with a sigh. “I mean, he’s not giving me a guilt trip or anything, but damn . . .” She laughed.
I grinned, gazing over under my eyelashes to watch Jared get down on the ground to reach under the car for something. His thick arms, smeared with grease, the sun and sweat on his tight stomach . . .
I looked away.
“Hi,” I heard a male voice behind me.
I dipped my head, getting out from under the hood to see Ben.
“Hey,” I blurted out, surprised.
He had his hands in his pockets, and he smiled, looking expectant. Or hesitant.
I pulled out my shop cloth and wiped the few smudges from my hands. Fallon and Juliet had stopped talking, Pasha had gotten up to go explore my garage, and Ben and I had an ocean between us.
It wasn’t easy like it had been two days ago.
I looked to my friends, trying to look calm. “Just a minute, you guys,” I told them, and I didn’t miss the glance they exchanged.
I inched past Ben, giving us some space beyond their ears.
Standing close, it was hard to meet his eyes, but I did. “Ben, I’m really sorry about the past couple of days,” I spoke softly. “I know things have been awkward.”
My gut twisted, and I didn’t want to hurt him. I almost wished he was a jerk so this could be easier.
“I know.” He nodded, looking around before meeting my eyes. “But I think I know why.”
His eyes flashed to Jax’s house, and I followed his gaze, seeing Jared with his back to us, but leaning his hands on the hood and peering over his shoulder, watching.
“He doesn’t pull my strings,” I explained. “Medical school is looming, and with the house going up for sale, everything is just—”
“So he’s not the reason I haven’t slept over?” Ben interrupted. “Or barely gotten you alone in two days?”
He wasn’t mad. His raised eyebrows and gentle tone told me he already knew the answers. It wasn’t that Ben expected sex, but he knew it was the next step between us. I’d been warm, and now I’d gone cold.