“Get Red out of your head, mother fucker. At least for tonight,” I tell myself.
Shoving my keys into my pocket, I walk the two blocks to the bar quickly. The security guard doesn’t stop me to check my ID. He steps aside, lifts his chin slightly in acknowledgement and gives me a shit-eating grin. I haven’t been here in a while, but the last time, in early January, I left with one of the bartenders and her friend.
As I settle into a seat at the dimly lit bar, my phone vibrates. At first, I ignore it and focus my attention on Drowning Pool’s “Bodies,” but after it buzzes a few more times, I drag it out of my pocket. I’m not surprised to find a string of messages from my sister.
11:29 PM: Are you alright, Lucas?
11:44 PM: Because Wyatt said you’re having a hard time.
11:48 PM: Lucas?
Making a mental note to strangle the shit out of Wyatt the next time I see him, I release a frustrated noise as I message her back. I’m nowhere near as quick as Kylie, and no sooner than I let her know that I’m alright and that I hope she has a good night not screwing with me, she responds again.
11:52 PM: You answered too fast. Did something happen?
One of the bartenders—thankfully not the same one who took me home a couple months ago—leans across the counter and her lips thin into a wide smile. “Relax, Mr. Rockstar. You’re about to break that thing into two.” She dips her head down to the phone I’m clutching in the palm of my hand. I glance at it too and loosen my grip, earning a “that’s better” from the blonde. “Haven’t seen you around in a long time. Been busy?”
I try like hell to come up with her name. I drag my eyes over her, searching for a nametag. When I don’t see one, I lift the corners of my mouth and shrug. “New music and shit.”
“Well then I’m glad you’ve been away.” Slinging her long straight hair over one of her bare shoulders, she straightens her back but not before purposely squeezing her tits together so that they come close to spilling over the top of her black halter. “I fucking adore your music.” She winks one of her heavily lined dark eyes at me—a clear invitation. I give her a dick response by asking for my usual, seasonal Sam Adams, and her smile grows even wider. “Anything for you.”
I follow her movements as she grabs my drink, which are all a little more dramatic and sensual than they normally would be, and finally spot her nametag pinned to the bottom of her shirt. She pretends to be oblivious to the appreciative grins of the rest of the mother fuckers sitting at the bar when she returns to me with one bottle more than I asked for, which I gratefully accept. “Want me to start a tab for you?”
I take a gulp of the beer, downing more in twenty seconds than I’ve drank all night, before nodding. “I’ll be here awhile.”
“Should I hold on to your keys?” She’s already holding her hand out, revealing a cluster of star tattoos across her wrist. “Come on, hand them over, Rockstar.”
It’s yet another invitation—one that any other man at this bar would grab and fuck in a second—but I’m not them. I shake my head. “I’ve got good self-control.”
She takes a step backward, wiping her hands on the front of her tight jeans. “Oh, I’ve heard. Let me know if you need anything, ‘kay?”
“Don’t worry, I will.”
She focuses her efforts on another customer, leaving me to my beer and my misery. I sit, hunched over my drink, wondering what the fuck is wrong with me. Two months ago and I would have taken the bartender back to a hotel and taken everything she was willing to give and coaxed her into offering me even more.
Now—now I’m this.
So fucked up that I can even hear Sienna’s soft, Southern accent over the sound of Slipknot’s “Snuff” playing on the jukebox.
I tip my beer bottle up and down the rest of my drink. I drink the second one a little quicker, trying my goddamn best to pretend like I don’t still hear her voice. When I finish the beer in record time, I signal the blonde bartender. Widening her eyes in surprise, she holds up a finger, indicating that it’ll be just a moment. When she turns back to her current customer, I let my gaze follow, and I realize that I know the woman ordering drinks.
Did I fuck her?
I shake that thought out of my head because I remember every one-night stand and every second of on-the-road sex I’ve ever gotten.
Is she one of Kylie’s friends?
But I wipe that idea away almost as quickly as the last. My sister doesn’t do female friends—she doesn’t trust anyone but her friend Heidi.
So why the fuck do I recognize the brunette?
A backstage pass, maybe? A journalist? Or a—
And then it comes to me like a kick square in my balls—an old memory of standing outside of an apartment a couple years ago, ready to apologize for my most recent mess-up, and this woman answering the door.
Telling me that her roommate, Sienna, was gone.
Chapter Five
Lucas Wolfe
I start to tear my gaze away from the woman and put her out of my mind because I’ve told myself I wouldn’t think about Sienna tonight, but the flash of a long, vivid red ponytail stops me. Hell, it nearly makes me lose my breath. And as Sienna slides into the seat next to the woman and straightens the strapless top that came down with the motion, it’s impossible for me to look away from her. She’s that fucking beautiful. Cupping her hand over her mouth, she bends until her lips are level with the other woman’s ear and whispers something that causes them both to laugh.
My plan to forget her flies out this dingy ass bar because I want to hear her laugh. I want to feel her hands touching me. And I want to touch her.
This is my opportunity to tell her how I feel without songs or elaborate gimmicks, and I know I need to take it. I drop my gaze down to my empty bottles before looking back up to Sienna. She’s sipping on something that’s pink and fruity-looking, and though my eyes are burning into her, she doesn’t glance across the bar at me. Instead, she lowers her glass to the bar counter and rubs the palms of her hands across her cheeks, wiping away tears of laughter. It’s a bitter, gut-twisting reminder that the last time I saw her, the last time I held her—she had been crying for an entirely different reason. Because of me.
“Sorry it took so long.” The bartender is out of breath as she walks back over to me. She slides another Sam Adams into my palm, taking the extra time to close my fingers around the cold glass. “You know how this place goes. Some nights we’re dead and then others we’re like—”
“What’s she having?”
The blonde’s pretty features draw together into a deep frown as she turns slowly and follows the direction of my gaze. “Which one?” The disappointment in her tone is unmistakable.
“The redhead,” I start, but then I hear the way of my voice sounds—like a fucking virgin finding his first Belladonna movie online—and I scale it back. “Just wanted to send her a drink. She did some work on one of our videos a few years ago. Wanted to tell her thanks for . . . putting up with my bullshit.”
Relaxing her frown into an easy smile, the blonde bobs her head. “Ah, okay. God, you know everyone don’t you?” She glances back over her shoulder at me, and I look her in the eye, trying to keep my gaze off of Sienna so that I can keep the dumbass look of excitement off my face. I’ve never put much stock in fate, but if this isn’t it, what the hell is?