Chapter ELEVEN
Mom screaming. Black wolf. Blood. Growls. Black wolf. Dad shifting. Teeth. More wolves. Claws.
Mom screaming. Black wolf. Dad roaring. Claws. Black wolf. Blood. Teeth. More wolves. Dad roaring. Blood. Blood. Blood.
“Jaime, wake up, baby.”
Black wolf. Blood. Growls. Mom screaming. Black wolf. Teeth. Claws. Blood.
“Wake up.”
Mom screaming. Claws. Black wolf. Blood. Blood. Black wolf. Blood. Blood. Blood.
“Jaime, now!”
With a loud gasp, Jaime vaulted upright in the bed. Her panting quickly became a loud cry of pain as her wolf fought with everything she had to escape her cage and deal with the threat that she didn’t understand was long gone. Jaime instinctively creased over with the pain, curling her arms around her stomach to help ease the spasms. Her wolf persisted in trying to escape her confines, leaping at the walls, clawing at them, and body-slamming them as she howled in anxiety. Breathing and thinking through the familiar agony, Jaime fought to keep control, to prevent the change.
“Come here, baby, come here.” Dante curved his body around her. His wolf was frantic with the need to do something, to cancel out her pain. Snaking a hand around her throat, Dante whispered into her ear, “It’s okay, it’s okay.” But he sensed no response from her wolf. “Calm down,” he ordered, pouring authority into the words. That seemed to get her wolf’s attention, as a rebellious growl trickled out of Jaime. Good. If her wolf was focused on him, she was focused on the present as opposed to the past. “Stop.”
“I’m going to be sick,” warned Jaime as her wolf became distracted enough that she resisted fighting to surface. Leaping out of Dante’s hold, she dashed to the en-suite bathroom and vomited repeatedly into the toilet until there was nothing left. The entire time, Dante held her hair out of the way and stroked her back.
“She fought a lot harder than that time at the bar.”
Jaime simply nodded, breathing heavily.
“But you kept control, baby. You still fought off her efforts to shift.”
“Only just.”
He understood now why she so feared what her wolf might do if she took over. He’d sensed her wolf’s fear and anxiety, her need to defend and protect and to eliminate the threat she believed was there. If she had surfaced in that state, she would have attacked him or anyone else near for sure.
“You certain you still want to keep me here?”
It was a rhetorical question, he knew. She genuinely thought he’d fear her wolf now. He gripped her chin. “You’re not going anywhere.”
She sounded tired and defeated even to herself. “Dante, you know it’s best for me to—”
“You’re not leaving me. You promised me you wouldn’t, Jaime. Yes, she was strong. But you were stronger. And you’ll keep getting stronger.”
“Yeah, but so will she.”
Just as Dante had anticipated, Josh had gone totally over the top for his birthday. Colored lanterns, balloons, and birthday banners were everywhere, particularly in the opening of the forest. Hey, Dante loved a good party like everyone else, but the whole thing was set up in a way that suggested the guy was all-important and deserved to be worshipped. Being Alpha didn’t mean the pack owed him that.
It was his job to earn their trust and respect.
“Is it just me who’s thinking that he’s gone a little overboard?” grumbled Jaime. Although she wasn’t at all interested in celebrating Josh’s birthday, she was quite enjoying seeing her old packmates.
“Nope, not at all.”
Seeing that yet another guy was ogling Jaime, Dante curled an arm around her and gripped her hip possessively. Not that he could really blame the guy. She was always beautiful to Dante, but she looked particularly stunning tonight in her white strapless dress and white stilettos. He’d barely resisted taking her hard and fast before they left. He was looking forward to rolling up that dress and bending her over while he f*cked her until she forgot how to breathe.
Seeing so many males admiring her had his wolf on edge, as if waiting to be challenged. Dante couldn’t help wondering if any of those guys from this pack were ex-boyfriends of hers. It was probably best that he didn’t know. He couldn’t be sure he wouldn’t punch them if it turned out that they were.
Snapping him out of his thoughts, an elderly couple approached. Immediately he recognized them from when he was younger. Just as many other members of his old pack had done that night, they shot question after question at him: How had he been? How was the rest of the Phoenix Pack doing?
Were he and Jaime mated? Then they would ask Jaime if she had any intention of returning and all about how Gabe was doing. He quickly came to realize that Jaime and Gabe had been popular in the pack, and he had to wonder why it was that they left.
Although it was nice seeing old pack members, he often found his mind drifting. He was very much aware of just how much work he had waiting for him back at his office, and it was playing on his mind. Being here was taking away valuable time he could have used on getting all that done.
Several times people had had to repeat their questions at least twice before it even registered to him that they were talking to him. Luckily, Jaime was a good conversationalist.
“You know, you could at least look like you’re enjoying yourself.” He blinked at her words, only then realizing the elderly couple was gone. He supposed it was kind of obvious that he was eager to leave. “Sorry. I just have a lot on my mind.” Yeah, and that was always the problem with him, thought Jaime with a sigh. She wanted to be understanding, she really did, but sometimes she couldn’t help resenting how little consideration she got. It was one thing for him to be tending to his duties, but it was another thing for him to be off in a world of his own when he was supposed to be spending time with her. Resisting the urge to argue with him was difficult, but she managed it.
“Dante,” drawled a voice that was almost as gruff as Dante’s. Jaime inwardly rolled her eyes.
God, she despised this guy. Out of all the brothers, he looked the most like Dante, but he was nowhere near as attractive.
“Josh,” said Dante with a nod and a shake of the hand. “Happy birthday.”
“Thanks. This is my mate, Rhea. You saw her briefly when we came to your territory with some of the others to ask about Taryn.”
Dante gave her a nod. “Congratulations on the pregnancy.”
“Thank you,” she said, placing a hand on her flat stomach. Josh turned to Jaime then.
“Jaime, it’s been a while. How’ve you been?”
“Super,” she replied flatly before quickly switching her attention to Rhea, giving her a brief hug. The redhead was a lot like Ryan in the sense that she didn’t say much, but she had a keen pair of eyes and a strong set of morals.
Dante frowned when Josh didn’t even arch a brow at Jaime’s lack of respect toward him. It was clearly no surprise to him.
“She’ll never forgive me for the way I was with you when we were kids,” he told Dante. “She didn’t feel that she could respect and follow me as she should be able to with her Alpha.” That was what her behavior was all about? That was why she left the pack? Dante swallowed hard, touched by the idea, and ran a hand down her hair. He’d known she was angry at all his brothers, but he hadn’t suspected that this anger was what made it impossible for her to follow Josh.
He hadn’t suspected it was enough to make her leave the pack she had been born and raised in.
Another redhead suddenly approached and gently nudged Rhea. “Aren’t you going to introduce me?”
As Rhea’s sister’s gaze raked over Dante, Jaime had the urge to poke those ogling eyes right out of her head. That same urge had repeatedly come to her throughout the night when various females had flashed him smiles that said they were remembering good times with him. Jerk.
Rhea nodded. “Dante, this is my sister, Marley. Marley, this is Josh’s brother. He’s also Beta of the Phoenix Pack.”
Marley gave him a dazzling smile and began chatting away to him, not even sparing Jaime a glance. Not that she and Jaime had ever been good friends or anything. Quite the opposite. It was kind of hard to be friends with someone who once tried to shove your face in a toilet, and Jaime was a grudge holder. Seeing that Marley was now licking her bottom lip invitingly at Dante and had moved even closer, Jaime clenched her fists. Her wolf was urging her to bare her teeth. “I take it the staring and drooling are side effects of your meds?”
Marley’s eyes finally went to Jaime, and she actually blushed. “Oh. It’s you.” She turned back to Dante. “Please tell me you’re not with her. I mean, she’s had nearly every guy here.” Just like that, Dante’s blood was boiling. His attention shot to Jaime, who, rather than looking angry or defensive, appeared bored.
Jaime sighed. “You never let the facts get in the way, do you, Marley?”
“She’s lying?” Dante had to hear her say it loud and clear.
Offended, Jaime gawked. “Of course she’s lying! How could you think she wasn’t?!” Insulted, her wolf flexed her claws, wanting to take a swipe at him.
Marley’s expression was sympathetic when she spoke to Dante. “Oh, you didn’t know? Well, I guess I wouldn’t want to broadcast that if it was me. I can understand why she’d lie about it.” Seeing that Dante was actually looking doubtful, Jaime wasn’t sure who she wanted to hit more. It wasn’t as if the guy was the Virgin freaking Mary anyway, was it? How hypocritical was that! What hurt her most was that he would actually think Marley was telling the truth.
“Marley, enough,” chastised Rhea.
“He has a right to know. I actually figured he already knew.” She shook her head at Jaime.
“You really have no one to blame but you, though.”
Somehow suppressing her wolf, who was eager to slice open Marley’s stomach, Jaime simply gave her an unpleasant smile. “You know, I watched an old episode of Friends yesterday. It was so damn funny it could have made your boobs fall off…Oh, you saw it.” Startled laughs burst out of both Rhea and Josh. In an instant, Marley’s expression went from amused to horrified.
Jaime jabbed Dante in the chest with her finger. “And you…It’s almost as though you have a curiosity about testicle retrieval surgery.”
As she began marching off, Dante strode after her and looped his arm around her, pulling her back against his chest. “I’m sorry, baby.”
“Get off me.”
“I shouldn’t have doubted you, I’m sorry. My head’s just full of all kinds of stuff right now.” Of course it was. She sharply shrugged out of his hold and turned to face him. He stiffened as if bracing himself for impact. What, did the workaholic jerk think he’d actually cracked her hard-won self-control and she was going to lunge at him? He should. She was thinking about it. Now would be good.
“Don’t be mad, baby—”
“We’re leaving.”
“What?”
She couldn’t believe that he sounded genuinely surprised. “You might be standing right there, but you’re not actually with me. Your head’s somewhere else, just like always. Sorry to see that spending time with me bores you so much.”
“It’s not that I don’t want to spend time with you. You know I do.”
“When there’s sex involved, sure. Or when you know that sex will soon be involved, sure.” He felt his face harden. “It’s not like that.”
Ignoring him, she continued, “But any other time, your head is back in your office.”
“You knew my job was demanding, Jaime.”
“Yeah, I knew I’d have to share you with your job. What I didn’t know was that I’d come second to it.”
“You’re not second.” How could she even think that?
“Yes, I am. But I don’t deserve to be.” He looked about to say something, but then a tall, regal-looking brunette decorated in pearls appeared, and his mouth dropped open wide, making Jaime frown inwardly. Was it admiration? Shock? Horror? All three?
“Laurie,” he muttered to himself, stunned.
The bottom fell out of Jaime’s stomach, and suddenly it felt as though her lungs had been pierced. God, not her. Not the woman he’d once loved enough to imprint with. Her wolf instantly growled, viewing her as competition. Then Jaime looked down and saw the boy at her feet, a boy who looked just as Dante had when he was ten years old, and a sickening feeling overcame her. It was well known that female shifters couldn’t get pregnant by anyone they weren’t mated to, but Laurie had been partly imprinted with Dante. She had been his mate—well, half mate—for a short while.
Could that count?
“Dante, how are you?” Laurie stepped forward and hugged him hard. When Dante’s hand left Jaime’s back and he awkwardly returned the hug, Jaime honestly thought she was going to be sick. Or slaughter them both right there and then.
Stepping back and trying to regain his sense of equilibrium, Dante replied, “I’m great. You?”
“Fabulous, thanks. Who’s this?”
Double-blinking, he turned to Jaime and saw how stiff she was. Her face was totally blank, but he could sense that she was pissed with him. Hugging another female was asking for trouble. Hugging a female he had once been partially imprinted with was pretty much suicidal. He had a feeling that he might have to do some serious groveling tonight. “Jaime, this is Laurie, Blane’s mate. Laurie, this is Jaime, my—”
“Packmate,” Jaime finished.
Dante winced. Oh yeah, he was in deep shit. It wasn’t as though he’d wanted to hug Laurie.
He’d just been in shock, and she’d practically dived on him. He’d always thought that if he saw her again, he’d at least feel a mixture of sadness and yearning, but there was nothing. There wasn’t even anger at the pain she had once put him through. That pain had been dulled since being with Jaime and was now nothing more than a slight prick of betrayal. How could he possibly yearn for someone else when he had a woman as amazing and perfectly suited to him as Jaime?
Despite recognizing Laurie as the female he had once been partially mated to, his wolf paid her no attention. He was more concerned about Jaime, fretting over how agitated she was. Right now, Dante was thinking of killing Josh for not warning him that he’d invited their eldest brother and his mate. “Where’s Blane?”
“He couldn’t make it. So it’s just me and Leif.”
Dante hadn’t even noticed the kid until then. He felt the color drain from his face. He decided to ignore the fact that the kid looked so much like him. He also decided to ignore that the boy was approximately ten years old and it had been ten years ago that he and Laurie were together. Lots of people had kids who resembled their siblings. It didn’t mean anything.
Laurie curled an arm around Leif and hugged him to her side, smiling proudly. “Isn’t he the best looking boy you ever saw?”
Jaime noted that Leif tensed at the contact and was peering up at his mother with a confused expression, almost as if her affection and pride in him was unusual.
“It’s the Garcea blood, isn’t it, kid?” Dante said to him.
Leif smiled a crooked smile that looked so much like Dante’s, and Jaime’s heart almost broke.
The possible implications were just too much for her to take in right then. She needed to get away, even though it wouldn’t be a good move to leave while the only woman he’d ever loved was practically lounging all over him, talking madly about a kid who was quite possibly his. The jerk wasn’t even removing her hands from him!
At any other time, Jaime would have clawed the bitch and made her claim on Dante clear, but what was the point in her making any kind of possessive gesture? Jaime cared for Dante—more than she was willing to admit, in fact—but that was part of the problem. Just as she’d anticipated, it ate at her to be with him, caring so much for him, when those feelings weren’t returned.
She “mattered,” he’d say. Yeah? Well, “mattering” to him wasn’t enough to make her feel secure in the relationship. Because of that, he didn’t feel like he was hers. If the delighted look on his face was anything to go by, he was still very much in love with Laurie anyway. He looked the happiest he had looked all night. Far be it for her to ruin the prick’s cozy reunion with the female who had once betrayed and left him. If he actually stupidly preferred someone so disloyal and fickle, they deserved each other.
Fifteen minutes had gone by since Dante first noticed that Jaime wasn’t beside him. He’d guessed that maybe she’d gone to get another drink or use the restrooms, but she still hadn’t reappeared. She could have just gotten to talking to someone, but both he and his wolf had the feeling that that wasn’t it.
“Excuse me,” he muttered to Laurie, who was jabbering on about something or other. He’d forgotten how vain and superficial she was. Or maybe he just hadn’t noticed before. He hadn’t taken more than four steps before he heard her calling him.
“Dante, wait.”
He turned. “I can’t, I need to find Jaime. I don’t suppose you saw which way she went, did you?”
She studied his face and then her smile fell. “She’s more than just a packmate to you, isn’t she?” She bit her bottom lip, suddenly looking nervous. “Could we go somewhere to talk? Alone?”
“About what?”
“I just wanted to clear things up. I know the decision I made, leaving you for Blane…I know it must have hurt you and—”
He quickly cut her off. “Laurie, you chose to be with your mate. I can’t blame you for that.”
“I heard that you stopped dating after I left you.”
And that had flattered her, he realized. “What happened made me hesitate to get involved in a relationship again, yeah.”
“But you’ve made an exception with Jaime?” She didn’t sound too happy about it. As if she thought he should be still pining after her.
“Yes. Look, I need to go find her.”
“Wait.”
“What, Laurie?” he asked impatiently. She flinched at his tone.
“You hate me, don’t you? Please don’t, Dante. I couldn’t bear it if you hated me.” Why did he get the feeling that this was all an act to get him to stay with her and comfort her?
“I don’t hate you. It was a long time ago. Say bye to Leif for me.” He moved away before she could say another word and headed to where Josh stood only a few feet away. “You haven’t seen Jaime, have you?”
He chuckled. “I’m the one person you can be sure she’d avoid.”
“So you haven’t seen her?”
“No. I’m surprised you let her leave your side.”
“You could have warned me that Laurie was here.”
Josh had the grace to look sheepish. “I actually hadn’t expected any of you to come and—”
“Whatever, it doesn’t matter.”
“Well, if you’ve been distracted so much by your ex that you neglected Jaime, you can bet your ass that she’s left by now.”
Dante was thinking the same thing. Nodding, he delved into his pocket and retrieved his cell as he walked away, continuing to scan the crowds. To his surprise, she answered on the fourth ring. Oh.
He’d sort of expected the silent treatment. Maybe she wasn’t pissed after all. “Hey, baby, where are you?”
“What the f*ck do you care?”
No, she was definitely pissed. “Where are you?”
“I’m in a cab, and I’m about five minutes away from pack territory.” He picked up his pace until he was practically marching to the SUV. “I’m on my way back now.”
“Oh don’t leave on my account! Stay with your precious Laurie and have a for-old-time’s-sake f*ck! I hope she strangles herself with those damn pearls!” It probably wouldn’t be a good idea to tell her that her jealousy was making him hard. “Keep giving me attitude, baby. I’m looking forward to f*cking it right out of you.”
“I don’t think so, Popeye! You stay the f*ck away from me! We’re done!” He was pretty sure his heart stopped for a second. “What do you mean, we’re done?”
“We’re done, over, finished!”
His wolf growled angrily. “Like hell we are. We’ll talk about this when I get back. I’ll be there soon.” She’d already hung up on him.
He was going to spank her ass so damn hard.
That plan was unfortunately foiled by the fact that she wasn’t in their room. Going by how faint her scent was, it was obvious that she hadn’t been in there since earlier. It was easy enough for Dante to guess where she was hiding. He stalked through the tunnels until he came to her old room and turned the knob. The door didn’t budge, and he almost smacked his face on it. Motherf*cker. She’d locked him out. “Open up, Jaime.”
“F*ck off.”
He might have snapped at that if he hadn’t heard the tears in her voice. “Ah, baby, let me in. I know how that must have looked to you, but I couldn’t care less about her. Come on, open up.”
“Just go.”
“Not a chance.”
“I’m pretty sure I already told you we’re done.”
Both he and his wolf growled at that. “We’ll never be done, Jaime. Now let me in so we can work this out.”
“Just leave me alone and go back to that bitch!”
“I don’t want her, I want you. Now open the goddamn door.”
“Look at it this way: you won’t have to divide your time anymore. You can go live, eat, sleep, and shit in your office and there’ll be no girlfriend to call you.” He heard the seriousness in her voice and found himself beginning to panic. She wasn’t just saying this in anger or because she was upset. She genuinely wanted to end this.
F*ck that. In the weeks that they had been together, she had gone from being important to him to being essential to him. He no longer just wanted Jaime, he needed her. He hadn’t even realized just how much he needed her until right then. He didn’t even care if needing her made him weak. “I told you a few weeks ago, nothing and no one—not even you, baby—will keep me out of your life. Open up. We need to work this out.”
“Not in a million years, Beta Boy! Now leave me the f*ck alone! ” He might have persisted if she hadn’t burst into tears that very second. It sent a sharp pain zigzagging through his chest. He’d made her cry. He’d hurt his female that badly. “Okay. If that’s what you really want, I’ll leave you alone.”
As the sound of Dante’s footsteps faded away, Jaime began to cry even harder into her pillow. At this point, her jaw was aching and her throat was hurting, but she couldn’t stop. Even though she could barely breathe through the tears and her eyes were beginning to sting, she simply couldn’t stop.
A part of her hadn’t wanted him to go, had wanted to let him in her room and in her body, and just let being second best be good enough. For a while it really had been enough, but the more she grew to care about him, the harder it was to be satisfied with just that. She didn’t want him to give up his role as Beta or to neglect his duties. She just wanted him to want her the way she wanted him.
Wanted to come first in his heart. The sad fact was that she didn’t even come close.
What happened the night before had brought home just how far down she was on his list of priorities. No matter how busy he was, it wouldn’t have been too hard to take one minute out of his day to answer her calls. But she’d accepted his apology, had given him the benefit of the doubt. Then she’d spent most of her day excited about tonight, about getting to have some time with him to have fun. All she’d had to look forward to was Dante wearing a vacant expression while she went totally unheard.
But when his ex-half-mate came over, he was all smiles for her. She easily got his attention and then managed to keep it so well that he hadn’t even noticed when Jaime walked away. Laurie had noticed, and she’d seemed extremely smug about it. Any other time Jaime might have answered her wolf’s urge to skin the bitch alive, but Jaime had known the tears were coming and damn if she’d have cried in front of everyone like that.
It was the first time in her life that she’d experienced a “flight” instinct. How ironic was it that the one person who was supposed to make her feel safe and secure was the one person who had made her want to run away?
That thought just about broke her. Not even attempting to fight the tears, she cried herself to sleep.
Jaime squirmed slightly as a big, hard body covered over her back and molded itself around her.
The cocktail of pine needles, cinnamon spice, and sandalwood that filled her nostrils made her smile. She knew that scent, would know it anywhere. Of course she would. This wolf was hers.
She hummed as he pressed a feather-light kiss to her nape. The feel of his hot breath on her skin made a shiver run down her spine, and she jerked slightly.
“Shh, baby. Relax for me.” When she did, he kissed the side of her neck lightly, rewardingly. “Good girl. My good girl.” Gently, he planted more feather-light kisses on as much of her neck as he could reach. Occasionally he nipped the skin or licked at the bite marks there, making her moan.
Feeling his hard cock pressing against her ass—oh yes, please, she’d like some of that—she pushed back against it, suddenly wishing they weren’t wearing any clothes. He groaned into her neck and began rocking against her, which caused her * to rub against the bed each time. A white-hot surge of pleasure ran down her spine, and her breathing quickened. She’d been wet since almost the second she scented him, and now she was aching for him. When she felt his mouth at her cheek, she turned her face to his.
He flicked his tongue out to tease hers. “Hungry, baby?” She nodded. “Tell me you forgive me.”
Jaime frowned. Forgive him? Forgive him for what?
“I’m sorry,” he whispered into her ear before nibbling on the lobe. “I hate that I made you cry.”
Cry? He hadn’t made her cry, why would he—
Jaime’s eyes flipped open, and all at once reality hit her. Ohhhhhh, the bastard. She struggled and twisted under him, growling and cursing. He lowered his body down even more on hers, trapping her there, and used his hands to pin hers to the bed. Had she been lying on her back, she would have been able to bite the f*cker. Recalling every combat move she knew, she repeatedly attempted to turn the tables and gain the upper hand. As her trainer, he knew every damn move she was going to try, and he was prepared for every single one.
Eventually she stopped struggling, begrudgingly accepting it was useless. Her wolf was utterly pissed about that. “I locked the door.”
“A locked door isn’t going to keep me away from you,” he said softly as he brushed his lips over to her nape and raked his teeth lightly over the skin. What he wanted to do was bite her hard, mark her again so that she understood who she belonged to, but he knew that throwing his dominance around wasn’t going to help here. Even his wolf understood that. He’d messed up, he’d hurt her, and now he needed to fix it.
“The point is I don’t want to see you.”
“I know.” He gently kissed her neck once more. “And I don’t blame you. But we need to talk.”
“You know what? We really don’t.”
“Do you have any idea how good it feels finishing work every night and coming back to find you right there in our bed? I don’t want to lose that.” It was strange how quickly he’d come to think of his room as their room and his bed as their bed.
“Only because you like having sex on tap.”
Dante bit her ear punishingly. “That’s not what I mean and you know it.” He kissed his way along her neck and over to her bare shoulder, glad she’d worn the strapless dress. He needed access to as much of her skin as he could to keep himself calm. Of course it was also making him harder than he already was. “If I was less selfish, I’d do what you want and let you go. If I was decent, I’d stand back and let you find a guy who’s better for you. But, see, the thing is…I wouldn’t let that guy live. So we need to work this out.”
“What’s the point? We’re barely ever together anyway.”
He couldn’t help feeling a little defensive. “I warned you my job was demanding.”
“It’s more than that. You hardly ever delegate. You’re always doing jobs that you don’t really need to do. You obsess over unfinished stuff. Even when you are with me, you’re constantly checking your e-mails on your BlackBerry or making calls. It’s like you feel compelled to be busy all the time.
I’m worried that you’ll burn out at some point.”
“Are you saying you want me to give up my position?” It was the one thing he’d been waiting for, the one thing he’d dreaded. Her response surprised him.
“No, absolutely not. I’m not giving you an ultimatum here. I’d never do that. I’m just explaining why I can’t be in this relationship—if you could call it that. You can’t have any idea how hard it is to be snuggled up to someone who you know is thinking about being somewhere else. I honestly thought I could handle it, Dante, but I can’t. I can’t handle coming second. If I didn’t care about you as much as I do, maybe I could.”
Hearing that she cared about him made him want to smile even as the tears in her voice made him want to punch himself. He kissed her neck again, unable to get enough of the sun-kissed taste of her skin. “You don’t come second. Don’t ever think that.”
“What else am I supposed to think? I can understand that you have to work a lot, I get that and I accept it. But you never make any time for me and you. When we are together, we don’t do anything together other than train and f*ck.” She felt him flinch. “It’s true, Dante. That’s not a relationship. It makes me a booty call, and I deserve better than that.”
A heavy sigh escaped him. “You’re right. You do deserve better. I honestly didn’t realize that I was reducing our relationship to that. The thing is, I’m relatively new at this, and I’m just taking my cues from you. I’m not used to being part of a couple, to having to make time for another person and constantly consider them—”
“Because you hold yourself back.”
“What?”
“You use your job as an excuse to avoid emotional intimacy. At first, I thought you knew, I thought that you’d open up a little now that we’re together. But you truly don’t realize that you do it, do you?”
He went to object to her claim, but he couldn’t. She was right. He did do that, and he had been doing it for a long time without even realizing it. Totally off-center, he buried his face in her hair, inhaling the familiar and comforting vanilla smell of her shampoo.
“I can understand why you do it. In all honestly, I’m not sure that I’d have been able to get into another relationship if someone I’d partly imprinted with had betrayed me and left me— and to be with my sibling. The fact that you’re even trying astonishes me. Especially when you obviously still love her,” she added, swallowing hard.
He lifted his head, frowning. “What? No—”
“I saw the way you were with her. You couldn’t take your damn eyes off her.” Her wolf growled at the memory.
Loosening his hold on her hands, he began massaging her palms with his thumbs. “I know I probably acted a bit weird, but it was just the shock. The last thing I’d expected was to see her. I felt nothing for her, Jaime. Nothing. My wolf wasn’t interested in her either.” Although her instincts told her he was being truthful, Jaime couldn’t quite believe that. “You gave her more attention than you did me. God, you didn’t even notice me leaving.” He winced. “Like I said, I was caught off guard, and she was telling me all about my nephew and, well, I was interested. Just like I’m interested in knowing Josh’s baby despite not having much of an interest in Josh himself. I don’t believe kids should pay for their parents’ mistakes.” She wondered if he was aware that he was talking about himself. “Yeah, well, your nephew sure looks like you.”
He knew what she was getting at. “He’s not mine.”
“You asked her?”
“No. But I know that Blane wouldn’t have kept him around unless he was sure the kid was his.
Besides, I’d have smelled the pregnancy on her before she left me. There’s no mistaking the smell of a pregnant shifter.”
Okay, he did have a point there. She might have thought of that herself if jealousy hadn’t been taunting her.
“I know I behaved like a dick tonight. It wasn’t fair to you that I let myself be distracted by thoughts of work—”
“—and Bitch Face.”
“And Bitch Face,” he allowed, stifling a smile. He had no idea how Jaime could think he wanted anyone but her. He’d assumed she knew how much he needed her, but then why would she?
He hadn’t told her, hadn’t even hinted at it. Instead, by working so much and so hard, he’d given her the impression that she came second to him.
It occurred to him then that if he didn’t give her those words, he really would lose her. “It’s a good thing that you care about me, baby, because I care about you. A lot. I’m not going anywhere. I can’t give you up, Jaime, and I won’t. Now that I’m aware that I’m holding back from you, I can focus on changing it.”
“I don’t think you can. You’re constantly stuck in Beta mode. You let your job define you.
Your job isn’t who you are, Dante, it’s what you do. There’s a difference, but you don’t see that.” He thought about that for a second and then sighed. “You’re right. Everything you’ve said has been right. Not that Rhett and the guys haven’t already said that to me a thousand times. I just never really thought of it as a problem. But that was when I didn’t have you to think about. You have needs and I’m not meeting them, and that’s not acceptable to either of us. Give me a chance to fix this, baby.
I’ll do what I can to ease my job commitments. I’ll start delegating more and making sure we get more time together and—”
“Don’t try to make huge changes,” she interrupted, touched by the gesture and feeling her anger begin to melt. “That’ll never work. And I’m not asking you to make big changes, I never did. I just wanted to appear in your schedule somewhere.”
“From now on you will,” he vowed, lifting his weight to flip her onto her back so that she could see the seriousness in his gaze. “When I plan schedules for me and the enforcers, you’re going on mine—right there in black and white. You were right when you said that sometimes I do stuff I don’t really need to do. I just have this…urge to be doing something, to keep busy. But I’ll work on it
—no pun intended. I’ll finish at a certain time each evening, okay? I can’t say that I won’t be called out occasionally to do things or sort things out. It’s part of my job. But I’ll make time for you, for us.” As he stared down at her with a hint of desperation in his eyes, he seemed so lonely and lost.
He looked at her as if she was his lifeline, as if he really did need her. Jaime never would have guessed that this relationship was so important to him. Never would have imagined that he was prepared to make these kinds of changes to his life. She felt even more of her anger fizzle away.
When she didn’t speak, Dante felt himself beginning to panic. His wolf was equally anxious.
He dropped his forehead to hers. “I know I’m a little f*cked up. Don’t give up on me, baby. I’m not saying that things will suddenly be perfect. I’m a guy, and guys can be stupid. I admit I need the room to mess up a little. I can’t promise I won’t piss you off again, but I can promise you that I’ll never deliberately hurt you. Nothing is more important to me than you. Nothing.” Why did he have to say stuff like that and wear that vulnerable expression when she was trying to stay mad at him? Earlier, she had been resolute on the decision that their relationship was over. But hearing him say these things, knowing that he cared about her and was prepared to make so many changes to his life in order to make this work…It was hard to hold out against that. Oh and now he was delivering sensual licks to her neck, knowing perfectly well how it made her melt. “That’s a low move.”
He chuckled. “I’m not above using sneaky methods. You know, when I was five, my dad told me that if I hadn’t been the runt of the litter, I’d have made a good Beta. He said that even when I was a toddler I had a one-track mind, that if there was something I wanted, nothing would distract me from trying to get it. And now I want you. And I can promise you right now that if you tell me you still want to end this, I won’t leave you alone. I’ll do everything I can to wear you down. I’ll stalk you until you cry, panic, and give in.”
She tried not to smile in amusement, but it was hopeless. Trying to resist him was hopeless.
“You know, before you, I worked even longer hours and I didn’t make time for anything else.
Everybody thought I couldn’t possibly have been happy to work so hard, but I was. It wasn’t until you that I realized I hadn’t been happy at all. I’d been sort of content, but that’s not the same thing as being happy. Not really. You answer a kind of… need inside me that I hadn’t known I had. Do you hear me?
I need you. I’d never imagined saying that to another person. If you’d have asked me to choose between you or my job, I’d have chosen you, baby.”
As she saw the truth in his gaze, tears stung her eyes. She combed her fingers through his hair.
“You are so good with that mouth.”
He grinned, but he couldn’t relax until he’d heard her say that she wasn’t going to leave him.
“Does this mean you forgive me, that you’ll give me a chance to fix this?” She released a long-suffering sigh. “I guess so.”
As relief washed over him, his body seemed to unlock from its position and sag. Dante fused his lips with hers, taking her taste inside him, pouring his need for her into her mouth. He kissed a path down her chin and along her neck, letting himself drown in her scent. He rubbed his cheek against hers, wanting that scent on his own skin and wanting his scent on hers.
“But I won’t forgive you for hugging Bitch Face,” she added, snarling.
As his mouth twitched into a smile, he was glad she couldn’t see his face. He knew she wouldn’t appreciate him finding her jealousy amusing—and damn hot, for that matter.
“Don’t think I don’t know that you’re smiling.”
He lifted his face and nipped her lip. “It’s a smile of relief, baby.” She snorted. “Sure it is.”
“I swear things will change,” he told her in a grave voice.
Jaime wasn’t positive that they could, despite his good intentions. But it was important in relationships to accept the bad with the good, wasn’t it? He’d said he’d choose her over his job, but she didn’t want to ask that of him. She cared for him too much to do anything that would hurt him.
Maybe with the right support, things could change over time. “I don’t mind helping you with Beta stuff if you want.”
“Help?”
“I know it plays on your mind when you have things to do, and I see that it’s a big weight on your shoulders. I work at the sanctuary most mornings, but I still have my afternoons free.” Emotion clogged in his throat. “You’d do that?”
“I’m not saying I don’t think you can do your job,” she said quickly in case he became offended. “I’m just offering to help.”
“Even though it would mean that you’ll sometimes work long hours, too?”
“If you think it will be good for you, yeah.”
He honestly couldn’t believe this. Instead of giving him an ultimatum, she was offering to work alongside him. This female got to him in ways that he could never articulate. He brought his lips down hard on hers again, shooting his tongue into her mouth to dance with hers and kissing her hungrily, almost violently. An urgent need to be inside her hit him. A need to feel her cling to him, mark him, and come apart around him.
“Does that mean you like the idea of me helping? You could think of me as your secretary or something.”
An impish grin surfaced on his face. “You really shouldn’t have said that. It’s making me think some really dirty thoughts about f*cking you on my office desk.” He lifted her leg, hooked it around his waist, and he dug his hips into hers, groaning.
She snorted. “As if I’d let you do that!” The breathlessness in her voice totally contradicted her words, but it was his fault for continuing to rock into her at a very seductive rhythm. She was still feeling needy from earlier, and this was making it worse. Jaime did love makeup sex.
“Oh you would,” he drawled, breathing hotly into her ear. “And you’d love it. Love it when I bent you over and tugged down your jeans so that I could see that gorgeous ass of yours.” Peeling up her dress to her waist, he snapped off her thong and slid his fingers between her slick folds. “I’d check to make sure you were nice and wet for me, just like you are now. Then I’d do this.” Jaime cried out when he plunged two fingers inside her. God, she’d needed that. Helplessly she moaned as he nibbled and sucked on her neck while slowly f*cking her with his fingers. He kept his thrusts slow and shallow, enough to make her moan, but not enough to make her come. He was such an ass.
“I’d thrust them in and out and in and out until you couldn’t take any more.” With his free hand, he unbuttoned his fly and rubbed the head of his cock between her folds. “And then…I’d f*ck you like I own you. Because I do.” Dante removed his fingers and slowly and deliberately pushed his cock inside her, wanting her to feel every inch of him sink deeper and deeper. Never had he felt a p-ssy this amazing—so hot, wet, suctioning, and oh-so-tight around him. He was pretty sure that no one in the world had a p-ssy this good. “Mine. All mine,” he said against her lips.
“Dante.”
“Shh. I’ll take care of it, baby.” Very, very slowly he withdrew, and then he slammed into her.
He’d hoped to go slow, but…“F*ck, I need this.” Then he was pounding into her with deep, branding thrusts. A territorial growl escaped him. This amazing female was his. This body that he constantly craved was his. He paused briefly to rise to his knees and hook her legs over his shoulders, allowing him to go even deeper with each violent thrust. He knew the cries that tore from her throat were a mix o f pleasure and pain. He knew exactly what line between the two that she rode, and he gave her exactly what she wanted.
Surprising a gasp from Jaime, he abruptly bit down on her nipple through her dress. He sucked it hard and plucked at it with his teeth over and over. “Dante, I’m going to come.” Good, because he wasn’t going to last much longer. Not when the panic he’d felt at losing her was still riding him. “Bite me, baby. Bite me hard.” Rearing up, she sank her teeth into his shoulder through his T-shirt. He growled. “Yeah, that’s it.”
Jaime sensed the desperation in his movements, because it was the same desperation she was feeling. Desperation to reconnect and be sure that they were there with each other and that everything was okay. Feeling his claws digging into her thighs, leaving marks of possession, she snarled in the back of her throat. It didn’t surprise her when a powerful fist knotted in her hair and pulled hard.
Objecting to a dominant male marking you when he thought you belonged to him was asking for trouble. But she liked trouble.
“Mine, Jaime. No one else will ever f*ck this p-ssy again. It belongs to me— you belong to me. Admit it.” When she didn’t, he tugged harder on her hair. “Admit it or I’ll stop right now and come all over you.”
“Do you have to be such a goddamn jerk?!”
“Admit it!”
“I’m yours,” she gritted out.
“That’s my good girl.” Then he bit down hard on her neck, and her p-ssy constricted around him as she came, screaming and shuddering. With a loud, guttural groan, he exploded inside her, filling her with everything he had—marking her with his come just as he had with his claws and teeth.
And he knew right then that he was seriously close to loving this female, if he didn’t already.