“Dad told me that Daniel came over for breakfast yesterday.”
Harper blushed and looked down, trying to get her dark hair to fall in her face and cover it up. But she only succeeded in making Gemma laugh.
“He just stopped by, and we happened to eat breakfast,” Harper said. “It was nothing.”
“Nothing?” Gemma arched a skeptical eyebrow. “Since when has Daniel just stopped by? I didn’t think you even liked him.”
“I don’t,” Harper insisted, but she wouldn’t even look at Gemma. “Why would I like him? I don’t even really know him. And he lives on a boat and doesn’t have a real job. And I barely know him. We’ve barely spoken.”
“Oh, my gosh, Harper.” Gemma rolled her eyes. “You like him, and from the way I’ve seen him put up with your crap, I’m guessing he likes you, too. What’s the big deal?”
“It isn’t a big deal. There’s no deal at all.” Harper squirmed under her sister’s accusation. “He’s nice, I guess, but I’m going away for college—”
“That’s over two months away,” Gemma said, cutting her off before Harper could launch into her going-away-for-college routine. “Nobody’s suggesting you marry the guy. Just have some fun. Summer romance. Live a little.”
“I’m not not living.” Harper tucked a loose strand of hair behind her ear. “I’m sorry if I don’t see the point in fooling around with some guy for a few weeks. If I weren’t leaving in the fall, it would be different.”
“No, it wouldn’t,” Gemma corrected her. “Before this, you couldn’t date because you had to take care of me or keep your grades up for school. Now it’s because you’ll be leaving for college, and once you’re at college you won’t have time for a relationship until after you graduate, and then you won’t have time because you’re looking for a job, and then it’ll be something else.”
“Well…” Harper twisted her ring on her finger. “All those things are true.”
“Not really. Lots of other people somehow manage to go to school and have a life,” Gemma said. “Everything I listed there, those are just excuses.”
“Concentrating on school is a valid life decision,” Harper argued. “We didn’t have money for college, and if I hadn’t worked my butt off to get that scholarship, I wouldn’t have been able to go.”
“No, I know.” Gemma sighed. “But you’ve been using both me and school as a shield to keep you from getting close to people. I’m not always gonna be around to act as a buffer. Someday you need to have real relationships with other people or you’ll risk ending up alone.”
“Wow.” Harper laughed darkly. “You make me sound like an old maid.”
“No, you’re not. I don’t think that, even. I just … all I’m saying is that maybe spending some time with Daniel this summer wouldn’t be such a bad thing.”
It wasn’t until she’d said it that Gemma realized what she was doing. She was trying to take care of Harper. If Gemma left tonight, she needed to know that her sister wouldn’t be alone, that she’d have someone to lean on. Harper didn’t think she needed anyone, but she did, and apparently Daniel had seen through her act and knew it, too.
Without thinking, Gemma went over and hugged her sister. Startled and confused, Harper just stood there for a second, then wrapped her arms around Gemma and hugged her back.
“I don’t know what’s gotten into you,” Harper said. “But I think I like it.”
After they finished cleaning up the kitchen, Harper went upstairs to read a book, the way she usually did after supper. Gemma stayed down in the living room, watching TV with her dad for a little while. When he got up to go to bed, Gemma hugged him and told him she loved him.
Harper usually stayed up pretty late reading. Gemma had to wait until after she fell asleep to leave, but she pretended to go to bed. Not that she could sleep. The watersong always seemed to get worse at night, and it had kept her awake almost the whole night before.
She kept her bedroom door open, staring at the crack of light coming out from under Harper’s door. When it finally clicked off, signifying that Harper was going to bed, Gemma waited another half hour just to be safe.
Without turning on her own light, she crept around her room. Her backpack hung on her closet door, and she started filling it with her personal belongings. It was hard to know what to bring, though.
She wasn’t even certain that she would go off with the sirens. She just knew she couldn’t stay here. If she chose to die, she didn’t want her family to see that. It would be better if they just thought she’d run away. Then they could imagine she was alive out there somewhere.
The only thing she could really do for her family was leave them with some hope.