For a few minutes she was content to just watch him: the geeky and totally offbeat way he moved, and how every now and again he would spout a few lyrics from what sounded like an old Run-DMC song.
The silliness of his behavior was juxtaposed with how surprisingly sexy he looked shirtless. When he moved, she could see the muscles in his back and his arms beneath his tanned skin.
“Alex.” She rapped her knuckles on the glass, and the noise scared Alex so much, he leaped out of his chair.
“Gemma!” he gasped and tore off his headphones. “What are you doing on my roof?”
“You weren’t answering the door. Can I come in?”
“Uh…” He scratched his eyebrow, staring at her for a moment as if he didn’t understand what was happening. “Yeah. Sure.”
He came over and opened the window for her, but that wasn’t exactly the response she was hoping for. Maybe she’d made a mistake by coming here uninvited.
“Sorry,” Gemma said as she climbed into his room. “I didn’t mean to disturb you.”
“No, you didn’t.” He shook his head, then rushed around to straighten up his room.
“You don’t need to do that because I’m here.”
Alex ignored her and continued to pick up the dirty socks and tech magazines that littered his room. It actually wasn’t that messy. He was a relatively neat guy. Other than the stack of Xbox games and empty Mountain Dew cans, it was a fairly clean room.
“You know what, Gemma, I’m sorry. I can’t do this.” Alex abruptly stopped what he was doing, holding an armful of dirty clothes. He rubbed his eye and shook his head. “What are you doing here? What’s going on with you?”
“I wanted to see you,” she said simply.
“No, I don’t mean just right now, but…” He set down his clothes in a pile by the door and turned back to face her with his hands on his hips. “What was last night about? Harper said you just took off with those weird pretty girls, and then you come to my house soaking wet because you need to know if I like you.”
“I’m really sorry about that,” Gemma said, but he was on a roll.
“And the other night, when you disappeared, again with those weird pretty girls! Harper thought you were dead. You know you’re scaring the hell out of your sister, and that’s not like you.
“And then when I came over on Tuesday and…” He lowered his eyes, and his cheeks colored lightly. “And we made out. That was hot and all, but that was … not you at all. I don’t even know if that was me.”
“I know, I know.” Gemma sighed. She wanted to tell him everything, but how could she? How could anyone possibly believe what she had to say?
“What’s going on?” Alex asked, and the desperation in his voice pulled at her heart.
“Do you trust me?”
“Honestly?” He lifted his head and looked her in the eyes. “A few days ago, I would’ve said unequivocally yes. But after what’s been going on lately, I don’t know.”
“I’ve never lied to you.” Then she shook her head. “I mean, maybe I did when I was a little kid. But since we started seeing each other, I haven’t. And I won’t. And I know how crazy everything is, and I don’t know how to explain it to you.”
“You could at least try,” Alex suggested.
“I don’t think I can.”
“Is it me?” he asked. “Or, I mean, is it us?”
“No, no!” Gemma shook her head emphatically.
“Because that’s the only thing that’s really changed. You were normal until we started getting involved.”
“No.” She stepped closer to him, putting her hands on his chest to convince him. “No, it’s absolutely not you. You’re the only thing that’s keeping me sane.”
“Why?” He looked down at her, but he didn’t reach out and touch her the way she’d hoped he would. “How did I suddenly become your grip on normalcy?”
“Because. I think you’re the only person who sees me for who I really am.”
“Gemma.” He breathed deeply and brushed her hair back, tucking a loose strand behind her ear. Something must have occurred to him then, because he looked around. “Wait. What time is it? Why aren’t you at swim practice?”
She smiled sheepishly at him. “I needed to see you.”
“Why? It’s not that I don’t want to spend time with you, but you never skip practice. You love swimming more than you love anything in the world.”
“Well, not anything.” She lowered her eyes and stepped back so she could sit on his bed. “I know that you’re unsure, but can you just trust me?”
He narrowed his eyes, perhaps afraid of what she might be getting at. “How?”
“Let me spend the day with you. Just one day.”
“Gemma.” He laughed a little and shook his head. “I want to spend every day with you. Why is today so important?”
“I don’t know.” She shrugged. “Maybe it isn’t.”
“You’re so cryptic lately.”
“Sorry.”
“All right, then.” He scratched the back of his head, then sat down on the bed next to her. “So what do you want to do today?”