I wondered if she hated me, if she blamed me for her parents’ deaths, for all the trouble Oren had caused her since I’d been born.
I didn’t know how close Elora had been with her parents, but before the christening ceremony, she suggested that I take the name Ella, after her mother.
And Elora had spared Loki. His father had gotten her mother killed and nearly cost both Elora and me our lives, yet when given the chance for vengeance, Elora hadn’t taken any on Loki. I was starting to think I had misjudged her completely.
Elora’s insistence on perfection and on me being Queen became much clearer. So much had been lost for me, to ensure that I would someday take the Trylle throne.
My stomach twisted with shame as I realized how ungrateful I must have seemed to her. After everything she and her family and the entire Trylle population had done for me, I had given them so little in return.
When I looked up into Garrett’s worried eyes, I realized something else. His wife—Willa’s mother—had died long before Willa had come home. I wondered if she had died in one of the battles my father had waged against the Trylle. If Garrett had lost someone he loved because of me.
“I’m sorry,” I told him with tears stinging my eyes.
“What on earth for?” Garrett moved toward me, surprised by my display of emotion, and put his hand on my arm.
“Elora told me everything.” I swallowed the lump in my throat. “Everything that happened with Oren. And I’m sorry.”
“Why are you sorry?” Garrett asked. “All of that was before you were even born.”
“I know, but I feel like … I should’ve been better. That I should be better,” I corrected myself. “After everything you went through, you deserve a great Queen.”
“That we do,” Garrett admitted with a small smile. “And you know that, so we should be on the right track.” He lowered his head to meet my eyes. “I’m certain you’ll be a great Queen someday.”
I wasn’t sure if I believed him, but I knew that I had to do everything I could to make that happen. I would not let my kingdom down. I couldn’t.
Garrett needed to tend to Elora, so I left him to it. Thomas stayed outside the door, still standing guard but giving them alone time.
Duncan, Willa, and Matt were waiting for me by the stairs. As soon as I saw Matt’s face, I couldn’t hold it together any longer. Tears spilled down my cheeks, and Matt wrapped his arms around me.
Once I calmed down, we went up to my room. Duncan got us all hot tea, and I made him sit down and pour himself a cup. I hated when he acted like a servant. Willa curled up next to me on the bed, comforting in a way that made me miss my aunt Maggie.
“So she’s dying?” Matt asked. He leaned against my desk, rolling the empty teacup between his hands.
I wasn’t sure how much Duncan or Willa knew about my parentage or about how the Trylle abilities hurt us. I didn’t want to tell them too much, especially Matt, and make them worry. So I left out all the major plot points, and only let them know that Elora was sick.
“I think so,” I said. She hadn’t said that exactly, but she had aged so rapidly. She looked to be in her seventies now, and that was after Aurora Kroner had healed her.
“That really sucks,” Duncan said, sitting on the chest at the foot of my bed.
“You were talking to her and she just collapsed?” Willa asked. She rested her elbow on the pillow next to mine and propped her head up so she could look at me.
“Yeah.” I nodded. “The worst part is I was arguing with her right before it happened.”
“Aw, sweetie.” Willa reached out and touched my arm. “You know it wasn’t your fault, right?”
“Did she say what she’s dying from?” Matt asked. The crease on his forehead deepened; he knew I had left something out.
“You know Elora.” I shrugged. “She’s vague on details.”
“That’s true,” Matt said with a sigh, and that answer seemed to satisfy him. “I just don’t like mysterious illnesses.”
“Well, nobody does, Matt,” Willa said with a teasing lilt to her voice.
“What were you and the Queen arguing about?” Duncan asked. He was changing the subject, which I would’ve been grateful for, until I remembered the answer to his question.
I was supposed to marry Tove Kroner.
“Oh, hell.” I leaned my head back so it thudded against the headboard.
“What was that for?” Willa asked.
“Nothing.” I shook my head. “It was just a stupid disagreement. That’s all.”
“Stupid?” Matt came over and sat on the bed by my feet. “Stupid how?”
“You know, normal stuff,” I floundered. “Elora wanted me to be a better Princess. More punctual and stuff like that.”
“You do need to be more punctual,” Matt agreed. “Maggie was always on you about that.”