They were quiet for a few minutes, concentrating on walking, on the movement of their feet, placing one in front of the other, the repetition providing a strange sort of comfort. Angel glanced at the sky, at the white-hot ball of the sun, at the blue sweep surrounding it. She wished it would rain, but she knew it wouldn’t.
“I guess we have to have faith in him,” Kirisin said suddenly. “The same way we had faith in what we were doing when we went searching for the Loden and didn’t know where it was or how we would find it. Sometimes faith in something is all you have.”
“Sometimes,” she agreed, giving him a smile.
She thought suddenly of Ailie, something she hadn’t done for a while. Losing the tatterdemalion had tested her own faith, but she had gotten past it. In an odd way, it had even acted to focus her on what she must do for those she was trying to help. Ailie had told her she was there to be her conscience, to whisper in her ear when she needed to rethink something. But without Ailie to prod her, she had no one but herself to rely on, and it had made her more careful than ever about thinking things through before she acted. It wasn’t that she was afraid of making a mistake so much as it was not wanting to disappoint Ailie. She owed her that much.
She glanced ahead again where Hawk walked side by side with Panther. How much pressure must he be feeling, she wondered, after what had happened last night?
“I’M TELLING YOU, Bird-Man, they’ll be back!”
Panther was so insistent about it that Hawk almost felt sorry for him. The other was trying hard to make Hawk feel better when doing so was impossible, and it was painful to witness. Say anything, Panther apparently had decided, to make it seem as though somehow it would all work out.
But Hawk knew better.
“Look, it’s just like I said,” Panther went on. “Fixit wanders off and Chalk goes looking for his dim-brained friend ’cause Fixit never knows what’s going on anyway. Chalk thinks he’ll find him, like he’s done before back in the city, but he gets himself lost because he isn’t in the city anymore and can’t find his way out of a closet. He wanders around all night, maybe sleeps, too, wakes up or whatever and starts back. He gets back, finds out Fixit didn’t go anywhere and the only one missing is him. But by then, it’s too late to let us know what’s happened. We’ve left, so now the two of them are stuck at the bridge until the rest of the force can join us.”
He paused, as if considering the reasonableness of his own argument, and then abruptly threw up his hands. “You know, it’s not like there’s any way they can tell us what’s happened! It’s not like there’s cells or radios or anything to call us up on!”
“I know,” Hawk said quietly. He glanced over at the other. “I hope you’re right.”
“But you don’t think I am, is that it?”
Hawk shrugged, shook his head. “I don’t know.”
“That’s right, you don’t know!” Panther was scowling, his frustration getting the better of him. “You don’t know a lot of stuff. Just because you’re some sort of fairy creature all full up with magic and special powers doesn’t mean you see things the right way all the time!”
“Okay, Panther.”
“Doesn’t mean that you got to be responsible for everyone, either. They’re big boys and girls, all but maybe Candle. You can’t be standing around keeping an eye on them every minute. You can’t expect—”
Sparrow pushed up beside him, her face intense. “Give it a rest, Panther. This isn’t helping.”
Panther glanced over dismissively. “You got something to say, say it to him. He’s the one needs it.”
She shifted the weight of the Parkhan Spray from one shoulder to the other, a gesture that caused Hawk to glance over warily. “Just stop talking about it,” she snapped, her eyes dark with anger and frustration. She was on the verge of tears. “We hate what’s happened, and we all wish we’d kept better watch over those two. How many times have we warned them, all of us? But talking about it just makes everyone feel even worse. It doesn’t do any good to shove it in Hawk’s face and say, I told you so. We know all that, so let’s give him a break, okay?”
“I’m saying he’s not to blame, Sparrow, case you weren’t listening to me.” Panther was unwilling to back down. “I’m saying the same thing you are. But he’s the one won’t let it go, not me. He’s the one thinks everything’s his fault since he’s leader and high mucky-muck and what have you. He’s the one wants to take on everything that happens and make it personal.”