Damn again!
“I have things on my mind,” Sixx murmured.
“Would you like to share?” Leigh offered.
She did.
God.
She did want to share. With somebody, anybody. She’d talk to a vagrant on the street.
But definitely Amélie, who knew Stellan, liked Stellan, knew Sixx (of a sort) and liked her.
And there was utterly no way she was going to talk to Leigh.
“I’m good,” she replied, turning and finally lifting her lipstick to her lips, leaning into the mirror to freshen it up.
“Sixx?” Leigh called.
“Hmm?” Sixx responded, not taking her eyes from her lips.
“You know I’m here, anytime, right?”
Shit, damn, fuck.
She was going to cry again.
Sixx finished her lips and turned to Leigh with what she hoped was a neutral expression on her face.
“Yeah. Sure,” she answered.
“And Leenie too,” she pushed it. “Mira. Felicia. Romy. Anybody. The start of a new relationship can be wonderful. But even if it is, it can also be confusing. So if you want to talk anything through, any of us would be there for you. Not just to talk through something like that. To talk through anything that might be troubling you.”
“As I said, Leigh,” Sixx started nonchalantly, “I’m good. But just to say, I’m not starting a new relationship.”
Leigh’s perfectly arched brows hiked up. “Sorry?”
“I think you have the wrong impression,” she shared.
“About … you and Stellan,” Leigh stated hesitantly, finishing, “living together?”
That did sound stupid.
But she had to go with it.
“We aren’t really. It’s a temporary thing. We have a spark. We’re working through it. It’s not going anywhere.”
Like someone swiped an eraser across it, Leigh’s face went blank.
But her voice held a distinct timbre when she asked, “Does Stellan know this?”
Sixx nodded. “Absolutely.”
She should have known she couldn’t pull shit with Leigh.
And Leigh didn’t hesitate to remind her she couldn’t.
She did this declaring, “He’s falling in love with you.”
Lord, she wished she could have sustained that with no reaction.
She, however, could not.
She flinched and cast her eyes away.
“If you’re playing with him, Sixx, you need to have a conversation with him so emotions can be held in check.”
Sixx again met Leigh’s gaze. “He’s aware. He just doesn’t want to listen. You know Stellan. He wants what he wants, and that’s all there is.”
“Is there a reason you don’t want him?”
“We don’t suit. Not for the long run.”
“And how’s that?”
Sixx swung a hand low, her meaning clear but she underlined it saying, “Uh … pretty much in everything.”
“Stop it,” Leigh whispered, and Sixx went perfectly still.
Leigh’s expression was no longer a blank slate. Her tone was not cool and unconcerned.
God, she almost looked in pain.
She definitely sounded it.
“Leigh—”
“You’re perfect for each other and you know it. And something is very wrong, and you know that too. If you don’t wish to speak about it, chérie, I will not press, even though everything in me is screaming to do just that. I will only reiterate that I care for you. I want the best for you. I care for Stellan. I want the best for him. Now that the idea of the two of you has been brought to light, I feel deep in my heart that the best for both of you is each other. That said, the last time we spoke of this, you rushed away, which is wholly unlike you. Only for you to return wearing a mask, which, I mean no offense, is not. Now, I’ve taken you by surprise when you’re always entirely aware of your surroundings, and you’re saying the man you’ve moved in with who is obviously enamored with you and that is only intensifying with time is someone you’re just playing with.” Her head tipped sharply to the side. “Are you switching for him? Is that what’s bothering you?”
“I thought you said you weren’t going to press,” Sixx, feeling like a bitch, pointed out.
Leigh shut her mouth.
Sixx shook her head, lifted her hand, dropped it.
“That was bitchy.” She straightened her shoulders. “And yes. He’s an excellent Dom. We’re exploring some things. But that isn’t it. I’m just a temporary kind of girl, and Stellan knows the score so don’t worry. He’s aware of where I’m at, and he’ll be fine when it’s over. You know he will.”
“I know nothing of the sort,” Leigh returned.
Back to the bitch, Sixx pointed out, “He was in love with you maybe a year ago.”
“You were not here maybe a year ago.”
God, why did all her friends have to be so damned smart?
“Amélie—”
“I would say, don’t hurt him, because normally, I would suspect Stellan could survive absolutely anything. With you, the way he looks at you, the change in his manner when he’s around you, I cannot say that’s still correct. But I won’t say that. I’ll say don’t self-harm and do that by denying yourself something that’s good for you for whatever reason that might be. If you’re concerned about switching, I know a switch. He’s perfectly at ease with both sides of that coin, and although a man, I still believe speaking with him would be useful for you. If it’s something else, I can only say what I’ve already said more than once. I’m here to listen, and it would be my honor, my privilege, Sixx, for you to share with me whatever is on your mind.”
To end this awkward conversation, Sixx replied, “Thanks. If I need to talk, I’ll reach out.”
“Promise me.”
Sixx looked her right in the eye.
And lied.
“I promise.”
The disappointment and distress Leigh didn’t hide shared she knew she’d just been lied to, right to her face, by a friend.
Well, there you go, she thought. Perfect. So when you’re gone, now Leigh will realize she’s not missing much of anything. Not that she probably didn’t know that already.
Leigh said nothing of it.
Instead, she shared, “I just need to use the loo. Olly is out with Stellan. If you want to wait, we can walk out together. If not, I’ll see you out there.”
Leigh also didn’t hide that Sixx’s response was disappointing when she said, “See you out there.”
She just nodded and moved toward the toilets.
Sixx shoved her lipstick in her clutch and headed to the door.
She wanted to sit in a booth with Stellan, Olly and Leigh now a whole lot less than she wanted to do it before, and she wasn’t fired up about it in the first place.
This was on her mind as she made her way through the halls back toward the bar.
So she hit Surprise: Part Two of the night when Aryas boomed, “Yo!” Her head shot up, and she saw a smiling, huge Aryas in front of her.
Right in front of her.
They were less than a foot away.
“Lost in thought, trajectory me,” he teased. “Not sure I could be bowled over, but Mistress Sixx on another planet threw me, so you were about to do it.”
“Aryas,” she said in greeting, taking a step back.
The jovial light in his eyes extinguished, and one she was getting too damned used to took its place.
“Christ, what the fuck is up with you?” he asked.
“Nothing,” she lied … again. “I just have an annoying job on the go and it’s on my mind.”
Aryas was not nearly as mannered as Amélie.
Not even close.
He demonstrated this with his reply of, “Bullshit.”
She was at the end of her rope with this crap, and she didn’t feel the need to be mannered about it either.
“Listen, I’ve got something going down at work that’s messing with me, and I don’t need anyone else to mess with me. I just need a drink and time to relax, and tomorrow I’ll be back in the grind, getting it sorted.”