The Girl Who Dared to Think 7: The Girl Who Dared to Fight

“No, you didn’t,” said an elderly voice, and I leaned to the other side of the chair to see Astrid Felix, former Knight Commander and longtime family friend. She’d led the investigation into Ambrose’s death, and my mother’s, and while I hadn’t been able to trust her at the time, seeing her filled me with a small sense of relief, as I knew from the files I’d recovered from Sadie’s office that she hadn’t been involved with the legacies.

But that didn’t explain why my father was here. Our relationship was beyond damaged; it had been obliterated after my mother died, with each of us blaming the other for her death. I blamed him for not listening to me like she had—and for turning against her when she did so—and he blamed me because, why not? I was the problem child, and had been my entire life, according to him. Even Alex, who had turned his back on our department, had been preferable to me in my father’s eyes, although Alex didn’t like him any more than I did.

“Hey, Astrid,” I said with forced cheerfulness. “Good to see you! Quick question: What’s he doing here?”

“Liana!” Dylan exclaimed, her tone appalled, and I gave her a sharp look filled with warning, telling her she in no way understood enough about my relationship with my father, before turning back to Astrid.

The older woman was frowning at me, but I ignored it and got to my feet. “Sorry, I just find it a little hard to believe he’s actually on my side. What’s up, Dad? Salvatore send you to plant the dagger in my heart personally, or…”

“Liana, stop it,” my father cut in sharply, looking down and away, his face contorting to something that looked like pain. Seeing it gave my anger pause, and I took a step away from him, disconcerted by what I was seeing. He looked damn near remorseful. I’d never seen an expression like that on his face, and it was so alien that it scared me for some reason.

“What is this?” I asked, unable to help myself. “Why are you on my side?”

He looked up at me, his dark eyes heavy with anger… that wasn’t directed at me. This was getting weirder and weirder by the second. “Astrid and I were meeting with Lieutenant Kellin to find out why Salvatore and his wife had been arrested, when the power went out. We were in the process of trying to figure out what was going on when Scipio sent his message. I knew Maddox’s loyalty to you extended far beyond her role as a Knight and Lieutenant, and started to arrest her—”

“You what?” I sputtered, suddenly furious that he’d even dared to try that. “You better not have hurt her, you rat bastard. If you did—”

“He didn’t,” Astrid cut in, frustration roiling off of her.

I knew she didn’t like the idea of us airing this particular family drama in front of the rest of the people in the hall, but I really didn’t care. I had no reason to trust my father’s intentions. I’d grown up with the man my entire life, and there wasn’t one single time when he’d put his faith in me. I found it very difficult to believe that he’d suddenly had a change of heart now, especially after he’d just admitted to trying to arrest Maddox.

“Your Lieutenant exercised some very quick thinking and offered to let us see the evidence that you’d collected against Salvatore and Sadie. It was pretty convincing, if not deeply terrifying,” she continued. “When Knight Commanders Farmless and Brown were able to get the power back on, we learned of the breach in the cells and were able to quickly mobilize against them. But we didn’t account for Salvatore. His emergency codes were still active, and he managed to slip up a few more levels, collecting followers on the way and convincing them that if they killed you, Scipio would forgive them.”

Her words were like a slap in the face, and disappointment and humiliation rolled through me. Even though I had anticipated there would be a schism in the Knights, a small part of me had hoped that there wouldn’t be. I didn’t want to be the reason the entire department devolved into murdering each other, but I was, and anticipation did nothing to soften the sting.

Still, that didn’t do anything to help me understand my father’s role in all this. “Okay,” I said, giving Astrid a pointed look. “That still doesn’t explain why my father is—”

“She started by showing us the messages between Salvatore and Sadie,” my father blurted out explosively, running a hand through the thick black crop of hair on his head, his mouth twisted with disgust and anger. “I had no idea, Liana. If I had known…”

“No,” I said coldly, but inside I found myself praising Maddox’s cleverness. Because in those messages, Salvatore had told Sadie to use any means necessary to secure his win in the Tourney, and she had. If there was anything that could reach my dad, that was it.

But it still didn’t make me want to forgive him.

“If you had believed me when I told you something was going on, then things might be different. But you chose not to. In fact, you told Salvatore that Mom’s loyalty couldn’t be counted on! You betrayed your own wife and daughter!”

My father met my gaze head-on during my tirade, his eyes solemn as I laid my litany of his crimes at his feet, for the whole world to hear. As soon as I was done, he nodded, his mouth tight. “I know,” he said simply—and to me, it wasn’t good enough.

“You know?” I said, incredulous. “You know?! You know nothing! You don’t know what it’s been like the last few months, trying to survive this nightmare long enough to figure out what was going on! Being set up for Gerome’s death, killing Devon Alexander! And I had no one to rely on except for Alex and my friends! And you tried to make sure of that!”

He sighed heavily and stepped closer to me, reaching for me. I jerked away, almost stumbling over the chair in the process, too angry and bitter to ever want his hands on me. He froze for a moment, arms still out, and then slowly lowered them to his sides.

“Let me try this again,” he said tiredly. “You’re right. I hurt you. I may have gotten your mother killed. It’s my fault, and I know there are no words to ever convey how sorry I am. But that doesn’t matter now. What does is that we stop whatever Sadie and Salvatore have planned.”

I stared at him. His words sounded sincere—hell, he looked sincere—but years of his abuse had left me filled with doubt and mistrust. I couldn’t believe him; it was too bizarre, too far-fetched.

And that had to be showing on my face, because Astrid made an irritated little noise and stepped around my father, placing her hands on her hips. “Look, believe your father or not. We’ve got bigger problems. We brought a contingent of Knights up here to defend against Salvatore and the others three hours ago, but we haven’t heard anything from central command in an hour. They had runners moving around with information and updated orders, but we haven’t seen any since the last one, and we have no idea what the situation is on the levels beneath us, or even in the surrounding areas. Whatever you have planned, you need to get moving. So please tell me you have a plan, or at least know what the hell is going on.”

“Sage,” I said, snapping out of my disbelief and focusing on what Astrid was saying. I didn’t like the news, not one bit, but at least there was some hope. Maddox had been doing an incredible job keeping the Knights on our side organized and working to defend the Citadel. She had been able to organize a defense against our enemies. Even though she didn’t know it, she had kept them from their true goal of getting ahold of Leo. The only problem was, she had no idea that was who they wanted, or that the sentinels were on the loose, so she couldn’t take steps to further ensure his safety.