“Leave…Cynna.”
Relief spread through every vein and cell. Her pulse slowed as she moved toward him, so thankful she’d found him in time. “There you are.”
“Go,” he rasped.
“No, I—”
Her steps slowed, and the words died on her lips when she got a good look at him. The light jacket he’d thrown on over his gray Henley was ripped at the seams, as if he’d flexed and the garment had shredded like tissue paper. The muscles in his arms were strained. Veins in the backs of his hands bulged. Her gaze slid higher, to his neck, red and covered in a thin layer of sweat, then to his profile, which she could just barely see with his head tipped down—his jaw, hard and rigid, his eyes squeezed shut tight, his temple pulsing with his racing heartbeat.
Another chill spread down her spine, but this one had nothing to do with the temperature. Hand shaking, she reached out to him. “Nick, just let me—”
“No.” He twisted away from her touch. “Just go. I’m not in a good place. And I don’t want to…hurt you…when it happens.”
Her heart pounded hard in her chest. No, she wasn’t giving him up to Zagreus without a fight. And Nick wasn’t getting rid of her that easily. Not after everything they’d been through.
She gripped his arm before he could get two steps away. “I’m not letting you give up like that.”
He whirled on her so fast, she barely saw him. His hands closed around her biceps until pain shot up her arms. But it was quickly overshadowed when he slammed her back against the side of the building, her spine and skull cracking the worn bricks.
“You think this is giving up?” He loomed over her, malice and rage and darkness swirling inside him to twist his features until he didn’t look like her Nick anymore but someone who was…possessed. “I don’t have a fucking choice in this. I never did.” He squeezed her arms so hard, her eyes watered and her mouth fell open in a silent scream. Then he released her and turned away. “Get the hell away from me while you still have a chance.”
Cynna gasped as the pain slowly receded, and rubbed her arms to ease the sting. Looking up, she watched Nick move toward the back of the alley, his shoulders shaking, his body barely holding it together as he put space between them. It was happening. He was about to break. And as soon as that happened, Zagreus would undoubtedly appear to claim his prize. He was right; she needed to run before it was too late.
But she couldn’t. Because whether he knew it or not, he’d brought her back from the brink of self-destruction. And she wasn’t about to let him travel down that same path.
She caught up with him and stepped right in his path. He drew to a stop and glared at her, his once mesmerizing amber eyes now nothing but hard cold pools of black. Just like Zagreus’s. Swallowing back the fear curling into a hot knot in her throat, she lifted her chin. “Focus on me.”
He growled and turned the other direction, but she rushed around him and stepped in his way again.
“Look at me. Stay with me.”
His eyes slammed shut. He shook his head as if trying to rattle something loose. Pressed the heels of his hands against his closed eyelids.
“Listen to the sound of my voice, Nick.”
He stumbled back. His body shook. His hands slid over his forehead until his fingers wrapped around the ends of his hair, pulling tight. Sweat slid down his temple. “Get. The. Fuck. Out. Of. Here.”
“No,” she said softly, stepping closer, knowing she needed to stay calm if she had any hope of pulling him out of this. “I’m not going anywhere. I said I’d stay with you, and I am. Focus on me. Just me. No one else.”
His back hit the building. His legs sagged. His body shook harder.
She needed to reach him on a physical level. Knew he needed that connection, as he had before.
She stepped between his legs and framed his face with her hands. His skin was cold and clammy, but this time, he didn’t push her away. And she focused on that rather than the way he trembled beneath her touch. “I won’t let you fall. I’m right here. They can’t have you. Do you hear me? I’m not letting go.”
His head fell forward until his forehead rested against hers. Against the wall, his shoulders shook, and his chest rose and fell with his shallow breaths as he fought that wicked darkness inside, struggling with every labored breath.
“Leave me,” he rasped.
She tightened her fingers against his jaw. “Not a chance. You’re mine.”
A growl rumbled from his chest, and in a sudden move, he lifted his head and closed his mouth over hers.
She sucked in a surprised breath, then moaned as he pushed away from the wall, yanked her body against his, and devoured her mouth.