“Perhaps not. You’re braver than I, Nefertiti. I never dared try my hand at writing anything of my own. But still”—his eyes twinkled—“still, if you reread it, I think you’ll have to admit that it really is dreadful.”
“It is not!” My voice rose to a shriek. “Take that back! I wrote this for Isis and if you don’t apologize, she’ll curse you for—!”
“Nefertiti! Nefertiti! What’s the matter?” Bit-Bit came racing into the garden. She threw herself at me with such force that the two of us sprawled in the dirt. “I heard you yell! What’s wrong?”
“Get off, Bit-Bit,” I snapped, pushing her off me and sitting up. “Nothing’s the matter. Go away!”
“But I heard—” She stretched out her hands.
I slapped them aside. “I say go away!” I didn’t mean to treat my little sister that way, but I was blinded by anger. Henenu’s words wounded my pride so deeply that I lashed out without thinking at any target that came too close. “Well? Why are you still sitting there?” I stood up, dragged her to her feet, and shoved her again. “Go, you stupid thing! Go!” She flew back into the house, crying.
Henenu looked at me wide-eyed. “Was that necessary, Nefertiti?” he said. “She only came running because she heard you making so much noise that she thought you were in trouble.”
“I don’t care,” I said, folding my arms. “I’m tired of having to look after her all the time. I want to be free to do what I want when I want to do it.”
The dwarf clicked his tongue. “And make everyone else dance to your music? You sound like your aunt Tiye. Unfortunately, she’s got the power to do it.”
“Good for her!” I wasn’t thinking about what I said. I was still seething over how he’d criticized my song. “If she wanted to learn how to read and write, she wouldn’t have to hide it, as if she was doing something wrong!”
Henenu’s face hardened. “With Queen Tiye, there is no right or wrong. There are only her wishes, her plans, and her desires.”
“And what’s so bad about that? I wish I had her power! I’d have real lessons, then, not just a few crumbs dribbled out whenever you come back to Akhmin!” I was shouting again, carried away by my anger. I wanted to fight the whole world.
“Nefertiti, lower your voice. You’ll draw attention.”
“From Bit-Bit again? So what? If she does come back out here, I’ll send her away again. What can she do about it?” I laughed and began to write Bit-Bit is a jumping mouse in the dirt. I couldn’t think of a more easily frightened creature.
A shadow fell over me as my finger traced the last symbol. “What are you doing, Nefertiti?” I looked up into Father’s stormy face.
Henenu and I stood in the cool shadows of the room where Father often met with the local priests and other important city officials. I didn’t know exactly what he did beyond the fact that he served Pharaoh, only that he had enough power in Akhmin to make great men bow to him, flatter him, and bring us gifts. He had left the house that morning in order to meet with the chief priest of the Isis temple. I thought he would be gone the whole day. How was I to know that his meeting would end early and that the first sight he’d encounter on his return home was Bit-Bit in tears, or that the next thing he’d hear would be me making such an angry uproar in the garden?
Now I waited to learn the price I’d have to pay for giving in to my temper. The secret between Henenu and me wasn’t a secret anymore. Father had caught me in the act of writing.
“Is this how you honor our friendship, Henenu?” Father demanded. There were three comfortable chairs in the room, but no one made use of them. There was too much tension in the air for any of us to relax enough to sit down. Bit-Bit was the only one not standing. She huddled at Father’s feet, curled up in a shivering, runny-nosed ball. “Is this how you honor my wife’s memory?” Father held my practice tablet in one hand. He’d seized it out in the garden and now he waved the piece of wax-covered wood in the scribe’s face.
“Your wife, Ay?” Henenu repeated. “Your wife is alive.”
“Don’t try cheating me with your wordplay, scribe!” Father’s knuckles whitened as he grasped my tablet with both hands and flung it to the floor. The sound of wood striking stone was so loud it made Bit-Bit yelp in fright and fall backward. I ran to her side and helped her up, holding her close while Father ranted on. “You know I mean her mother.” He gestured at me. “Why have you been teaching her to read and write? Do you ever use that oversized head of yours to think? You know what Tiye will do if she finds out there’s a second Seshat for her to exploit.”
Seshat? I knew her well. She was a goddess whose name itself meant She-who-writes, the wife of Thoth, who first brought the gift of writing to mortals. Why was Father invoking her now? What did the goddess have to do with my aunt Tiye?
“And how will Queen Tiye find out any of this?” Henenu spoke calmly in the face of Father’s fury. “You certainly won’t tell her, and I hope you don’t think I would do it. I never should have gone behind your back to teach Nefertiti, but I can’t say I regret giving her lessons. Your daughter has her mother’s gift for words. If I didn’t nurture that gift, then I would be dishonoring her mother’s memory.”
“Even if that same ‘gift’ killed her mother?” Father had never spoken so bitterly before, or so fiercely.
“Killed her?” I echoed.
Father turned and stared as if he were seeing me for the first time. “Nefertiti, leave us,” he said quietly. “Take your sister with you. This is between Henenu and me.”
I didn’t move.