“Hello, DJ.” He’d answered in very short order. “Is it done?”
I gripped the phone hard enough to crush it. “No, and I’d like to talk to you about it, sir.” I’d be respectful as long as I could. “I know Eugenie and Rand better than anyone, and they will be able to work this out. We can do damage control with Mace Banyan. There’s no need to take this step.”
The sound of pouring liquid and rattling ice cubes filled the silence on Zrakovi’s end of the call. “This isn’t up for discussion,” he said, finally. “The full Council of Elders has agreed that it’s the best course to take. We must ensure that the alliance of wizards and elves is not threatened, and the presence of this child threatens it.” He paused. “It’s after ten p.m. I suggest you proceed.”
I needed time to think. “This is a direct order? There’s no room for discussion?”
“None.” Zrakovi’s voice was flat. “And it is a direct order. Take care of the child.”
“You mean kill the child.” I wanted him to say those words.
He barely missed a beat. “Good night, DJ. I’ll expect to hear the sad news at tomorrow’s council meeting.”
I ended the call, but kept staring at the cell phone’s screen as if it might offer up some answers.
Alex didn’t ask what Zrakovi had said; there was no need. He looked at his watch. “You might be able to get Eugenie tonight; that would be better than putting it off. You can at least broach the subject with her.”
“No.” I was getting pretty good at using my sharp, icy voice.
Alex thrummed his fingers on the table. “Look, DJ, I know this isn’t something you want to do. It’s not fair to Eugenie. But it’s—”
“It’s wrong.” I fought to keep my voice steady. “It’s not fair to Eugenie, and it’s not fair to Rand. It’s sure as hell not fair to that baby. And it’s not fair to me, damn it. I’ll tell Eugenie that this is what the wizard leaders want, but that’s as far as I step into it. If she wants to abort her child, I will help her find someone to do it. But it’s her decision. Not mine, not yours, not Zrakovi’s, not Mace Banyan’s. Not even Rand’s.”
My voice had grown steadily louder, and from my messenger bag on the table, the end of the elven staff shot out a spew of sparks without my touching it. Charlie agreed with me.
Alex raised his voice to match mine. “DJ, I agree with you, but it’s out of our hands. This is bigger than us and what we think is right or wrong. What if the fae get their hands on Eugenie and use that baby as a bargaining tool? Or the vampires, or the other elves?” He dropped his voice. I hadn’t done a grounding ritual in a while, and I felt his absolute misery. He was torn in half over this. I tried to feel sorry for him, but pity couldn’t escape its blanket of anger.
“Alex, I know it’s your job to do what the Elders tell you, and I know you take it seriously. I know this is tearing you up inside.” I had to try getting through to him. Like it or not, Zrakovi would listen to Alex before he’d listen to me. “Zrakovi is probably right that this baby is going to cause problems, but this isn’t the answer. You know it’s wrong. Somebody has to stand up for Eugenie in all of this, and we’re all she has.”
He closed his eyes. “We can’t win this fight, DJ. If we don’t do it, Zrakovi’ll find someone else who will. Someone who doesn’t give a damn about Eugenie at all. And who knows, it might be better for Eugenie in the long run.”
I’m a snarky person, I’ll admit it. I could be downright cranky. But true, bone-deep anger? I didn’t feel it often, but I recognized it. My veins heated like fire, and my voice burned with it. Alex could tell himself that little lie all night long to make himself feel better, but that wouldn’t make it true. “I seriously doubt Eugenie would feel that way.”
Alex rubbed his eyes; the strain showed in every movement. “I repeat: It’s going to happen, whether you or I approve or not. Zrakovi said it himself when I was trying to change his mind; you aren’t the only Green Congress wizard in town. I thought you’d rather it be you doing it than a stranger.”
“I see.” I saw far, far too much. I had prayed for clarity, and now I had it. The thing that finally turned my world black and white wasn’t what I did or didn’t tell Alex, or how I did or didn’t feel about Jean Lafitte. It was Eugenie, and our friendship, and her baby, and my own sense of right and wrong. It was what I could live with at the end of the day, and what I couldn’t.