Except, would she have weeks to live afterward? To think about him and regret what she’d let him take from her?
He’d warred with himself over whether or not he should go after her and apologize, but in the end he’d decided to give her some space. Besides, his failure to take her virginity when he’d had a couple of prime opportunities was eating at him. Why the hell was he stalling? He told himself that he was playing with his prey the way he often did, but was he? Or was he holding off the grand finale because for the first time in his life, he was enjoying being with a female for something other than sex?
He’d lain awake for hours thinking about it, and when he finally had fallen asleep, he’d succumbed to nightmares again. He’d been transported back to that dark basement, the dungeon where he’d spent his childhood, locked in a cage with nothing but a scratchy wool blanket on the dirt floor to sleep on and a metal pail in the corner that functioned as a toilet.
He shook his head free of the memories and nightmares as he exited the dining car and headed to Serena’s cabin. She hadn’t shown up for breakfast, and now he was concerned that she’d been spooked by what had happened between them last night and had gotten off the train at Luxor or Cairo, the two stops before Aswan. If she had, he’d be screwed, right to the wall and right into his grave.
Shit.
He increased his pace from a walk to a jog as he approached her sleeping car. When he reached her cabin door, he knocked. Waited. His lungs ached, and he realized he’d been holding his breath.
She didn’t answer. He knocked again and was about to kick the door in when she finally opened up. She wore khaki cargo pants and a long-sleeved, olive button-down, but her feet were bare and her hair was a fluffy tangle of gold around her shoulders, and he got the distinct impression he’d woken her up.
“Hey,” she said. “I must have fallen asleep after I got dressed this morning. Did you already eat breakfast?”
He nodded and held out the box in his hand. “I figured you’d slept in, so I brought you something.”
“You didn’t have to do that,” she said, even as she snatched the box out of his hand. “But thank you. Are you feeling better? How’s your stomach?”
“Fine.” He stood there like a dolt, feeling awkward and stupid, and she wasn’t making things easier by staring at him as if she expected something. Like, maybe, an apology. Fuck. He wasn’t good at those. He rubbed the back of his neck, which did nothing to ease the tension there. “Ah… could I come in?”
She backed up in the narrow space. “Suit yourself.”
He stepped inside. “I owe you an apology,” he blurted. Man, that hurt.
“I agree.”
Okay, what now? He shoved his hand in his pocket and felt up his switchblade, which always comforted him. “So… I’m sorry.”
“Boy, you suck at apologies.”
“What do you want me to do? Fall at your feet and beg for forgiveness?” He snapped his mouth shut, because talking to her this way was definitely not going to score him points.
He seemed to be losing ground with her a lot faster than he was gaining it, and he needed to get back on track and fast. He’d called E this morning, and his brother had sounded like hell as he talked about all the shit that had gone down. Apparently, the hospital’s entire third wing had collapsed. Six staff members had died and it had taken some seriously powerful magic to keep the New York City streets above the underground hospital from caving in.
Suck up. Just suck up. “Serena, I’m sorry. I really am. I’m not good at apologies. Obviously.”
“It’s okay,” she sighed. “It’s not all your fault. I overreacted to something that shouldn’t have been a big deal.”
“No.” He took the box away from her, tossed it onto the bed behind her, and framed her face in his hands. “I’m the one who overreacted. I’m not used to anyone worrying about me. No one except my brothers, anyway.” Hey, that wasn’t so hard. Probably because it was the truth. Novel idea, telling the truth.…
“And your brothers worrying is a bad thing?”
“It’s like they think I need a babysitter.”
She covered one of his hands with hers, stroked his fingers with her thumb. “So, are they overprotective, or have you done something to deserve their concern?”
He blinked, taken aback by her blunt question. “You speak your mind, don’t you?”
“I’ve found that beating around the bush takes too much time to get to the same place.”
Man, he liked her. He really, really liked her. “Baby, you’re speaking my language.”
“So… about your brothers?”
“It’s a little of both with them,” he said, running with the honesty thing. “E’s a doctor, so he’s naturally a worrywart, and Shade’s always been the nurturing kind, but he’s gone overboard since he became a dad.”
“And what about you? What have you done to make them worry?”