Only Human (Themis Files #3)

—Ohhhh …

—Yeah. That. We took it home for the night and dumped it in the same tree the next day.

—What happened to it?

—I have no idea. It probably died. That’s not the point. The point is it was a pest, a glorified rat with a fuzzy tail, but it was cute, and helpless, and we felt responsible. Fortunately for us, the Ekt are more patient than Kara and I were, so they took care of us for more than a day while their government decided what to do next.

—And what did they decide?

—Nothing.

—Vincent. I get that you don’t trust me, but if you’re gonna come up with lies, they should at least be reasonably believable. And this is coming from someone who’ll believe just about anything. No, really! I’m supergullible. I buy all these stupid things on television, then I’m too ashamed to return them.

—I told you before. The way they work, it’s slow.

—Nine years slow?

—Yeah! They have a very strict democracy. Some things are hard to decide for them.

—I thought they had an emperor.

—They do, it’s an empress now. But she doesn’t do anything. It’s a lot like the queen. The people make most of the decisions directly. Everything that involves another species, another planet, the decision belongs to the Great Council of Akitast.

—OK, so they vote on things. We do that. I don’t see what’s so hard about it that it would take a decade.

—It’s not like us. What we do, it’s baby vote. These people are major-league voters.

—What does that mean?

—Well, here, we vote on a few things, like government. Some places require an absolute majority, 50 percent of the vote plus one. Some places don’t care, they just pick whoever got the most votes. But we choose from a list; there are a limited number of options. Imagine that instead of a list of candidates, we let everyone write in the name of whoever they’d like, and to be elected to something, you’d need more than half the vote, from everyone. That’s how they decide things. Getting the votes isn’t a problem. These people vote on everything, all day every day. Getting things done depends on the question. If they can formulate it as a yes/no question, then it’s all good. If it’s multiple choice, it gets complicated. The Council had no clue what to do with us. That’s an endless number of possibilities, and they couldn’t agree on any of them. When we left, they were still debating whether they should allow us to stay.

—How stupid do you think I am, Vincent?

—What do you want me to say?

—Hmmm, I don’t know. The truth, maybe?

—That is the truth. What part of it is bothering you? That they’re not a threat?

—Tell me about their army.

—Really? There isn’t much more to say other than what I’ve already told you. We didn’t exactly go on a tour of their military. They have a shit ton of robots. We’ve seen some transport ships, but they said they had … Are you listening to anything I’m saying?

—I’m sorry. We’re gonna have to do this another time.

—What is it?

—It’s … not good. We have a bit of a problem.

—What kind of problem?

—Your daughter.

—Has she done anything?

—Well, she’s gone. I suppose that’s something.

—What do you mean, gone? Where?

—Hmmm. That was gonna be my question. Where is she?

—How the hell should I know? You have me locked in a room all day. I’m not even allowed to see her.

—That’s a bit of an overstatement, Vincent. That room isn’t locked, it’s well guarded. There’s a difference. But you do have a point. Let’s say I believe you. Dr. Franklin was also in her room. Besides, I really don’t think she’s the prison-break type. Are you sure it’s not you?

—What? No. Yes, I’m sure.

—Fine. It wasn’t you. It would just be so much better if it were you.

—Why’s that?

—Because if it’s not your people who broke her out, then it has to be one of my people. You can see how that’s a problem, can’t you? Yesterday, I had three people who could pilot Themis. Three pilots. Now one of them is dead and one’s— —Ekim’s dead?

—Oops! I forgot to tell you, didn’t I? He is very dead. He died two days ago. From cat poo, no less.

—You should have let him go. I told you to let him go home!

—You were serious about that? Well, had I known … We’d have let the alien kid go, with Themis, because why not? That certainly would have solved my pilot problem. Because now … Now Eva’s gone missing. I’m not supergood at math, but I know that robot needs two pilots and three minus two is less than that. As if that weren’t enough, it would appear I have a traitor working for me … CHYORT VOZ’MI! I’m sorry. I’m a little ticked off at the moment. Do you know how much trouble I’m gonna be in for this? I had to fill out three forms just to talk to her. Imagine the paperwork for losing her altogether. We’re, like, not supposed to lose people. That’s a big no-no. It’s kind of our thing, really.

—Am I supposed to feel sorry for you?

—You could! That would be nice. I could use a hug. You could also help me find her before this gets any worse.

—Why would I do anything to help you?

—Good question. There doesn’t seem to be any, does there? I mean, right now you’re just happy she found a way out of here. Right? About five seconds from now, you’ll realize she now has the entire Russian Army and secret service after her. You’ll think: Hmmm, my daughter isn’t the most restrained person in the world. I hope she doesn’t do anything stupid when they catch up to her. And they will, they’re very good at finding people. Soon—OH! I think it’s happening! Now you have this mental image of her getting shot eight hundred times and— —You so much as touch her, and I’ll— —Oh, for God’s sake, Vincent! Run that through in your head one more time! Are you sure that’s the right play? The words you’re looking for are: “Please, Katherine! Pretty please! Isn’t there anything you can do?”

—Is there?

—NO! Not unless I find her first! Are you sure you don’t know where she is? Where would she go to? Where would she hide?

—In Russia? She’s never … We’ve never been here. She doesn’t know anything. She’d have no idea where to go.

—She left you a note.

—What did it say?

—It said: “Dad, how the hell could Katherine possibly know what I wrote? She just found out about the note.”

— …

—Don’t worry, you can have it, after everyone else takes a look at it.





FILE NO. EE066—PERSONAL FILE FROM ESAT EKT


Personal log—Eva Reyes and Vincent Couture


Location: Aptakt Market, Etyakt region


—Yours sees the world in only two dimensions. These ones are born and ready for adoption.

—Eva?

—What?

—Why are you telling me? I wrote the clue. I already know what it is.

—I’m just thinking out loud, Dad. I don’t get it. It’s hard.

—It’s a treasure hunt. It’s supposed to be hard. Otherwise, it’s a treasure stroll or something.

—You still haven’t told me what’s in that jar.

—I’ll tell you when you figure out this clue.

—What’s in the jar?

—Really, Eva?

—I wanna know!

—A couple strands of hair.

—Yours?

—Yeah, mine. Do you think I go around cutting other people’s hair for no reason?

—I don’t know! … Do I really need to ask?

—Ask what?

—Dad! Why do you have your hair in a jar?

—Oh. That. You’ll see.

—That’s not funny, Dad. Tell me!

—You’ll know when you figure out the clue. It’s the last one.

—I don’t know what it means! Mine sees the world in two dimensions. My what?

—Why do you see things in 3D?

—I … because my eyes are facing forward?

—How many eyes?

—Two eyes.

—So …

—What do I have that doesn’t have two eyes? … I don’t have anything!

—Not here. Back home.

— … Kara’s plush gopher!

—Yes!

—All right. These ones are born and ready for—The little furry animals next to the fruit stand?

—Yes! They’re called yotyot, by the way.

—Do you mean …?

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